# Why do gays want to call their relationship a "marriage"? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [July 7, 2015, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-gays-want-to-call-their-relationship-a-marriage/724436 "2015-07-07T01:03:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 21
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2015, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-gays-want-to-call-their-relationship-a-marriage/724436/401 "2015-07-16T13:49:03Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > That’s varied a lot by time and place. In traditional Jewish law, a wife is sort of a superior slave, who is owned by her husband, but women do have rights to own property. It was customary for a woman to sell herself into marriage in exchange for a bride price which was held in escrow, but given to her outright in the event her husband divorced her. And in Muslim marriages, the man can take up to four wives, provided he can indeed provide for all four, and if the man divorced her, she is supposed to be entitled to her bride price. In reality it didn’t always work that way. When women are subjugated and kept as second class citizens it is too easy for those in power to deprive them of what few rights they have. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2015, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-gays-want-to-call-their-relationship-a-marriage/724436/402 "2015-07-16T15:02:51Z")
> [@cornopean](#): > > I would say that a father brings a measure of bravado, discipline, risk-taking, and other such things typically associated with maleness. Father’s typically discipline their children with greater severity and consistency than the mother. On the other hand, a mother brings tenderness, compassion, and other such typically associated with femininity. When a child gets hurt, s/he runs to mom, not dad. Wow. I cannot believe anyone would say this in this day and age. My sister the lesbian has raised eight daughters, and she gave them more discipline than we ever had in our two parent marriage. I supposed you don’t support single motherhood because “a child needs a father and a mother.” Every single pregnant mother should be forced to give birth and then put the child with a married, opposite sex couple. If one member dies, the child goes to another opposite sex couple. Shit! In his book “Pro-Life Answers to Pro-Choice Questions,” author Randy Alcorn never mentions adoption without talking about married, Christian couples. I personally wish every woman considering abortion would give the child to a gay or lesbian couple. That would certainly put a stick into the anti-abortion crew’s wheels. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2015, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-gays-want-to-call-their-relationship-a-marriage/724436/403 "2015-07-16T15:58:53Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > And in Muslim marriages, the man can take up to four wives, provided he can indeed provide for all four, and if the man divorced her, she is supposed to be entitled to her bride price. > > In reality it didn’t always work that way. When women are subjugated and kept as second class citizens it is too easy for those in power to deprive them of what few rights they have. Or, as was the case for our guide in Cairo, the husband can take other wives and make life so intolerable for the first wife that she initiates the divorce. Which she can do at least, but she loses the bride price. Our guide said it was well worth it. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2015, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-gays-want-to-call-their-relationship-a-marriage/724436/404 "2015-07-16T16:06:38Z")
> [@cornopean](#): > > Seriously, my interpretation of marriage may be “odd” to you but it has been the understanding of marriage of the vast majority of world history including the three major theistic religions. It at least deserves respect. To quote Reconstructionist Judaism: The past gets a vote, not a veto. Nothing wrong with respecting past traditions until that respect becomes a chokehold on the future. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-gays-want-to-call-their-relationship-a-marriage/724436.md?page=20)