# Why do more women like dancing than men do? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 2, 2025, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501 "2025-01-02T22:16:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/61 "2025-01-03T15:57:47Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > I didn’t say _men_ I said _societal_ expectations.That includes other women too - their peers, their moms. And then there’s the entire media industry pushing the notion. Fair enough. > [@MrDibble](#): > > I don’t see why it needs more specificity than that. > > I mean, for one thing, this picture you paint of women going dancing in groups by themselves is a fairly recent phenomenon, so you have to see how that means it’s obviously a cultural construct, right? It could be that women are dancing to meet societal expectations (despite not particularly enjoying dancing), or it could be that (straight) women like dancing so much that they’re willing to hit the dance floor without any men in attendance. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/62 "2025-01-03T16:04:38Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > And my response is that they’re a broad spread of subcultures, when it comes to demographics. Goth, punk, and rave are all subcultures in which putting on the subculture costume and going to a club is a main activity; and at that club, dancing is one of the main things to do. They share a lot more in common with one another than they do with other subcultures like knitting groups, hiking groups, or political groups–groups that don’t go clubbing as a major social activity. For myself, I love dancing, but haven’t danced in years, for reasons I don’t entirely understand but blame largely on stress and exhaustion and this fuckin world. But I’ve definitely observed gender disparity, in some specific settings: - **Children’s dance classes**. This may have an element of “dance moms” to it, but there’s also a huge element of differential preference from the kids. Far fewer boys than girls express interest in dance classes. At every amateur production of _The Nutcracker_ that I’ve seen (and believe me I’ve seen my fair share), most of the child dancers are girls, with half of them dressed in traditional boys’ clothes so that it doesn’t look like the extended Silberhaus family suffered a culling of firstborn sons. - **Sexuality Perception**. If I told you about a teenage boy who wanted to become a professional ballet or Broadway dancer, would you wonder, even momentarily, if he were gay? I would, and then I’d hate myself for it. A straight teenage boy who wants to dance will no doubt be aware of the stereotypes, and might be discouraged from pursuing dance out of fear of being thought gay. Hell, a gay boy might be discouraged for exactly the same reason. I’ve never heard of a similar stereotype about girls who want to dance. - **Dancers as objects of beauty**. To the extent that dance is for the dancer’s benefit, this one doesn’t apply; and to the extent that dance is an expression of strength, it doesn’t apply. But often our culture puts dance as an art form based on the beauty of the dancer’s body and its movements, and boys and men are strongly encultured away from considering ourselves beautiful. All of this is, of course, toxic nonsense that deprives people of the joy they might otherwise get from dancing. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/63 "2025-01-03T16:11:53Z")
A man goes into a club where there’s 100 women he doesn’t know. He sees a few who aren’t with other men, engaged in a group of girlfriends, or absorbed on their phones “Would you like to dance?” “No” Would you like to dance?” “No” No matter what else they were occupied with, 98 women instinctively are aware they don’t want to dance with that guy who no one else wants to. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/64 "2025-01-03T16:19:41Z")
> [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > No matter what else they were occupied with, 98 women instinctively are aware they don’t want to dance with that guy who no one else wants to. Wait, what? This guy has no friends to go to the club with? Or he’s unaware of club culture, that it’s a group activity that you usually go to with folks you already know? Maybe the 98 women realize that he’s got some social issues going on that make it sketchy to hang out with him, that if they say yes, he’s going to want to parlay that dance into something much more? If that’s why he doesn’t want to dance, he’s vastly misunderstanding the situation. Instead of going clubbing, he should be going to a contra dance, where there’s much more of a “would you like to dance” culture (in my experience). Edit: my comments about club culture are based on my going to clubs back in my late teens and early twenties, with a focus on goth and punk clubs. It may be that club culture has changed since then, or that other types of dance clubs are much more open to single guys approaching single girls and asking them to dance. But I’d be a little surprised. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/65 "2025-01-03T16:28:15Z")
> [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](#): > > Are you implying that you disagree with the premise of what I said? Yes. I disagree that they involve different kinds of coordination. > [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](#): > > I said upthread that the male brain tends to be better at tracking movement of objects You are aware that ballet _also_ involves tracking movement of objects, right? They’re called “the rest of the corps”. > [@Ulfreida](#): > > White men don’t move their torsos or their hips very much. I have a standard “Dancing like a White Boy” routine that kills at parties, and that’s basically all it is. > [@Machine\_Elf](#): > > t could be that women are dancing to meet societal expectations (despite not particularly enjoying dancing), or it could be that (straight) women like dancing so much that they’re willing to hit the dance floor without any men in attendance. I think both sorts of women exist. > [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > They share a lot more in common with one another than they do with other subcultures like knitting groups, hiking groups, or political groups–groups that don’t go clubbing as a major social activity. Fair enough - of the _dancing subcultures_ I know, most don’t seem to have a male deficit on the dancefloor. I do know of ones that have a lack of proportionality - ballroom, for instance, had a strong female-favouring disparity, as does English and Scottish country dance. But a lot more people go to Ibiza than a ceilidh… > [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > A man goes into a club where there’s 100 women he doesn’t know. Sorry, is this the 70s? Or prom? Unless you’re at a specifically ballroom-y event, you don’t need a partner to dance. That guy should just dance. By all means, chat to other people. But asking women to dance, at a modern club, feels like something from a John Hughes movie. ---
**Author:** ![Ulfreida](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ulfreida/32/8014_2.png) [@Ulfreida](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulfreida)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/66 "2025-01-03T17:10:56Z")
Back in the early 80’s, my bestie and I would go dance at the lezzie disco. They had no cover charge, no guys to hit on you, and since we were together, women didn’t either. Used to dance blisters on my feet. Most white guys are so awful at dancing we never wanted to dance with them anyway. I used to dance with gay men and black and hispanic guys. They all could dance. That same era, my bestie and I heard music coming out of an upstairs window at night, downtown, and we just started dancing in the street. A guy leaned out and asked if we wanted to come up, so we did. It was a bunch of black people up there, dancing. It was fun. I was way more adventurous in the olden days. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/67 "2025-01-03T17:14:09Z")
> [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](#): > > What I am saying is that women seem to be more inclined to gravitate towards sports that purely involve body coordination, as opposed to body coordination with a ball or ball-like object, which is what men seem more inclined to gravitate towards. I think you are not giving enough weight to social expectations. Lots of women play tennis, because that’s seen as a “normal thing for a woman to do”, in a way that playing baseball or football isn’t. > [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > **Children’s dance classes**. This may have an element of “dance moms” to it, but there’s also a huge element of differential preference from the kids. Far fewer boys than girls express interest in dance classes. My mother told me that when i was in kindergarten, the teacher put on some music and told the whole class to dance, with no other instruction. And every other girl did something resembling ballet. And i pranced around doing my interpretation of an “Indian war dance”. And that’s when she knew i wasn’t like the other girls. (I think I’ve mentioned that my kids think I’m trans, or at least, non-binary. Not having those concepts at the time, my mother pegged me as lesbian.) Anyway, none of the boys tried to dance ballet. That was no-doubt seen as a “girl’s thing”. But there are a lot of types of dance. Morris dancing is traditionally done by teams of men. But mainstream, white, American culture does tend to mark “dance” as feminine. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/68 "2025-01-03T17:17:29Z")
And on an unrelated note, ballroom dancing is harder for the lead (traditionally a guy) than for the follow (traditionally a gal). A lot of my square dance friends also ballroom dance, and they all prefer to follow, especially for dances they don’t know well. So at least part of the disparity may be that we (mainstream white Americans) think “ballroom” as the default dance form, and that’s actually a lot more accessible to women. Except for the problem of them finding a lead to dance with. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/69 "2025-01-03T17:33:41Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > at least part of the disparity may be that we (mainstream white Americans) think “ballroom” as the default dance form Either line dancing or nightclub/prom-style dancing would be the default, surely,? And I don’t think even the slow dances of the latter qualify as “ballroom” ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/70 "2025-01-03T17:39:33Z")
It’s not that ballroom dance is the dominant dance form – not by a long shot – but i think it’s what comes to mind when someone says “dancing” without any qualifiers. Except to people who actually dance, who will likely think first of whatever dancing they do. And yes, the most popular dance form in the US is “club dancing” , I’d guess. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/71 "2025-01-03T17:59:19Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > i think it’s what comes to mind when someone says “dancing” without any qualifiers. For you (and possibly many other Dopers). For me, it’d be a scene from an 80s teen movie. Like both types of dancing on display [in this bit of Sixteen Candles](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aiRoNlyOhzo). So yeah, akin to your “club dancing”, I guess, but surely that’s the kind most Americans who attended high school have at least _some_ experience with even if they no longer dance, themselves. ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/72 "2025-01-03T18:33:53Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#): > > To be a good dancer, you need an elegant streamlined body, and women have that by default, while men have to really work hard to achieve that, so I think dancing comes a bit more naturally to the willowy and slender, rather than the stocky and top-heavy WTF? Many women are stocky and/or top-heavy. And many women work their butts off (more or less literally) to try to become willowy and slender; and quite a few of us fail at it. > [@Princhester](#): > > Not even close to representative. Of society or dancing. If they comprised more than 5% of Western society I’d be surprised. “Western society” isn’t particularly representative of “humans in general”; however much it likes to think so. ---
**Author:** ![The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_wind_of_my_soul)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/73 "2025-01-03T18:47:05Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > I think you are not giving enough weight to social expectations. Lots of women play tennis, because that’s seen as a “normal thing for a woman to do”, in a way that playing baseball or football isn’t. That’s fair. I agree that there are elements of social expectations in play as well. ---
**Author:** ![jnglmassiv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f07891/32.png) [@jnglmassiv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jnglmassiv)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/74 "2025-01-03T18:49:07Z")
I enjoy dancing but understand the OP. I remember a school dance truism: If you lift your arms above your waist, you’re gay. > [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > Would you like to dance?” > “No” [![](https://i.redd.it/o9105uc7aeae1.png) ](https://i.redd.it/o9105uc7aeae1.png) Source: [Reddit - Dive into anything](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/1hr48u9/keep_on_dancing/) ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/75 "2025-01-03T18:51:47Z")
Oh, I’m a challenge square dancer. The first thing that comes to mind when i hear “dancing” is something like this: [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/yFlk-e5T-9Q/maxresdefault.jpg "Square Dance patter tip with all dance programs") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFlk-e5T-9Q) But yes, what’s in the video you linked is something most Americans have at least tried. ---
**Author:** ![Ulfreida](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ulfreida/32/8014_2.png) [@Ulfreida](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulfreida)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/76 "2025-01-03T19:09:18Z")
I know three men who are really into dancing: two tango, one salsa. These and a number of others (folk dancing, clogging, line dancing, there’s quite a list) have devoted participants who meet regularly. Probably any large town has a few of these ongoing. Many of these dances are accessible to anyone reasonably coordinated who puts effort into it, some are not couples dances, nor are they about showing off or demonstrating your sexuality. Dance includes and transcends all of this. It is as universal as music. It’s one of the things straight white Anglo guys often miss out on experiencing. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/77 "2025-01-03T20:00:41Z")
> [@thorny\_locust](#): > > Many women are stocky and/or top-heavy And many men are willowy and elegant, but neither are the default. If your body shape fits the medium, then you excel at it, and when it doesn’t you don’t. The typical fit woman is a shape that’s perfect for dancing, the typical fit man is a shape that’s perfect for sports. Of course there’s plenty of crossover potential, but it tends to be more women lean toward dance, and more men lean toward sports. Which is the OP’s question. ---
**Author:** ![jjakucyk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3d9bf3/32.png) [@jjakucyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjakucyk)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/78 "2025-01-03T20:10:22Z")
> [@jnglmassiv](#): > > [Reddit - Dive into anything](https://i.redd.it/o9105uc7aeae1.png) Oh wow that’s brutal. Anyway, most of the responses seem to be focusing on the “doing” part of dancing rather than the “liking” part. Societal expectations, gender norms, etc., can and do influence whether someone likes a thing, but they more often influence if they do it or not. Sure women do tend to dance more than men for various reasons, but is it because they like it more, or is it because men feel like they can’t, even though they might want to? I think that’s the more interesting question. A way to filter out the bias and gender normative performance expectations might be to look at solo dancing. For instance, people dancing while mopping or vacuuming, usually while listening to music. There’s even sitting dancing, such as in the car or at the computer. Obviously you can’t do much when sitting down, but some people bip and bop to the beat while others don’t. So I think if you dance with a broom, that says something more about what you like than whether you sit off to the side at the club because you’re afraid of embarrassment. ---
**Author:** ![Ulfreida](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ulfreida/32/8014_2.png) [@Ulfreida](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulfreida)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/79 "2025-01-03T20:15:50Z")
Just my opinion but I think the differences between men and women physically are really unimportant in this discussion. Otherwise, why do many many cultures dance with equal delight of the sexes? It’s really just Anglos. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2025, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501/80 "2025-01-03T20:22:53Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#): > > The typical fit woman is a shape that’s perfect for dancing, the typical fit man is a shape that’s perfect for sports. This is completely bananas. Where on earth are you getting this idea from? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-more-women-like-dancing-than-men-do/1012501.md?page=5)