# Why do old men like lawns? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 19, 2016, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360 "2016-07-19T21:52:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/41 "2016-07-20T14:53:27Z")
I’m 55, and after years of having both chronic fatigue and a wife with ambitious lawn and garden expectations, I have come to positively loath the very idea of lawn keeping. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/42 "2016-07-20T15:01:15Z")
Trust suburbanites to come up with the idea of planting a crop that you can’t eat, can’t sell, and you have to harvest twice a month. I would prefer to have what we call around here a “prairie garden”, where you just let anything grow that wants to. But there are ordinances about that kind of thing where I live. I’m 60. I don’t particularly care about my lawn, although it gets mowed when it needs to and I spray for dandelions because otherwise my neighbors complain that they spread from my lawn to their lush, perfectly manicured expanse. One neighbor asked me why I let my son and his friends chew up the lawn playing baseball or tag or by generally running around on it. I told him “I am not raising grass, I am raising children”. I want to keep the property looking presentable - I trim the bushes and rake the leaves and so forth - but let’s not get obsessive about it. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/43 "2016-07-20T15:19:16Z")
As for the claim that lawns are “environmental disasters”, there was a recent study showing that they actually act as carbon sinks, absorbing far more carbon than is produced in their maintenance (the report was produced by an independent researcher using multiple peer-reviewed studies and was apparently financed by the Outdoor Power Equipment Institute, so make of that what you will). [http://www.lawnandlandscape.com/article/study-shows-responsibly-managed-lawns-reduce-carbon-footprint/](http://www.lawnandlandscape.com/article/study-shows-responsibly-managed-lawns-reduce-carbon-footprint/) We have reasonably healthy-looking lawn areas without the use of supplemental water, fertilizer or pesticides. I am fine with the idea of people having meadows or other plantings to replace lawns (which probably reduces one’s carbon footprint even further). What is insane is a lawn in a desert or other arid zone that uses up scarce water resources. Note to deer: Get the hell off my lawn. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/44 "2016-07-20T15:31:54Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > Lawns are part of the green space around a property that includes trees and birds, shrubbery, flowers, and other greenery. It’s all part of the natural ambiance that makes a house pleasant to be in and around. > … > What are you going to have if you don’t have a lawn? It’ll either be dirt or paving. There are other kinds of landscaping; you mentioned non-grass plants yourself. You really only need a grass lawn if you want to do things _on_ grass. Other approaches may take a little more thought to get started, but can be lower-maintenance in the long term, and more interesting visually. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/45 "2016-07-20T15:34:04Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > We don’t like lawns, we hate young people. This. And I am so much closer to seeing the grass from the other side I plan on enjoying this side as long as possible. And you aren’t getting your ball back either you snot-nosed stinking little crumb-cruncher. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/46 "2016-07-20T15:41:42Z")
I’m old … I hate my lawn … I delight on making the grass plants _scream_ in pain when I mow … it’s so dry right now they’ve all turned brown and dead looking … there they are begging for even a little dew … I like waving a bottle of Round Up at them, threatening to kill them all outright. They started it by catching fire one summer and tried to kill me, burn me out of house and home, filthy buggers. When they got the hawthorns to join them was the last straw … it’s war I say … ---
**Author:** ![BlackKnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eb8c5e/32.png) [@BlackKnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlackKnight)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/47 "2016-07-20T15:42:45Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I think that annoying buzz of the lawnmower is way more disruptive to peace and quiet in suburbia than a slightly unkempt lawn. I agree completely. With today’s technology there’s no reason why we can’t make mowers that are vastly quieter. When I worked 2nd and 3rd shift, lawn mowers were worse than sunlight. At least I could block out the windows reasonably well. But the annoying buzz was impossible to escape. I think large blank sections of grass are ugly. (With the exception of natural prairie land, with 6+ foot tall grasses swaying in a light breeze.) I vastly prefer a significant number of trees to blank expanses of grass. As for watering the lawn? With all the rain this season I’m more worried about it eroding into the lake! ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/48 "2016-07-20T15:44:43Z")
One reason to keep your lawn nice and neat is that a untended lawn, full of weeds and tall grass will attract vermin like rats and snakes. Why people would want their property to look like a complete shithole is beyond me. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/49 "2016-07-20T16:41:41Z")
> [@spamforbrains](#): > > I think lawns are an environmental disaster, and I have never encountered\*\* a single woman\*\* who thinks lawns are in any way important or even remotely interesting. But I have met a lot of men who think a perfect green expansive is important. I dumped a sexual partner once when he suddenly changed from normal to actually caring about what the lawn looked like, and I’m currently completely mystified about my dad’s obsession with the lawn. Is this like a peacock’s tail? Is a message board an encounter? Because if so, now you have. Assuming you mean “one woman” and not “an unmarried woman.” I like my lawn and care about what it looks like, and I mow it. I do make my husband or son use the weed whacker. But if they refused, I would do that, too. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/50 "2016-07-20T16:57:16Z")
I think for some people, maintaining a lawn is simply a sort of hobby. They derive pleasure from putting work into something and achieving a desirable result. In this case, putting effort into maintenance and gaining the satisfaction of having a nice looking yard. Hobbies aren’t generally something that one expects to justify to another as having a general societal benefit. I like watching football, but think collecting comics is dumb. Many on this board would disagree with my opinion on the merits of either hobby. Unless the OP’s father is having actual OCD episodes of interrupting normal life routines to care for the lawn – for example, leaving family dinner to spend ten minutes with the leaf blower because a single leaf was spotted on the lawn – it sounds like the OP’s opinion of lawns is far more irrational than the father’s behavior. Dumping someone because they like lawns? That’s fucked up. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/51 "2016-07-20T17:14:05Z")
A nice, flat, big, trimmed, verdant green lawn is a thing of beauty. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/52 "2016-07-20T17:16:04Z")
> [@spamforbrains](#): > > I think lawns are an environmental disaster, and I have never encountered a single woman who thinks lawns are in any way important or even remotely interesting. But I have met a lot of men who think a perfect green expansive is important. I dumped a sexual partner once when he suddenly changed from normal to actually caring about what the lawn looked like, and I’m currently completely mystified about my dad’s obsession with the lawn. Is this like a peacock’s tail? The real reason why men like lawns is because the stupid feminists will not let us own slaves anymore. Men have an inherent need to control and hurt things. So we do that with a lawn these days by keeping it nice and trim and neat and by slicing it up a couple of times a month. > [@spamforbrains](#): > > Lawns were invented in the 1800s by rich people showing off how much land and labor they could waste. Who told you these lies? The lawn was invented in 1957 when Leave It to Beaver aired. The creators invented the lawn for the show and then the sheeple audience copied the idea. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/53 "2016-07-20T17:19:16Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > One reason to keep your lawn nice and neat is that a untended lawn, full of weeds and tall grass will attract vermin like rats and snakes. > > Why people would want their property to look like a complete shithole is beyond me. It deters would-be robbers. ---
**Author:** ![davida03801](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5e925/32.png) [@davida03801](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davida03801)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/54 "2016-07-20T17:20:56Z")
As a guy I have a hard time getting worked up about the status of the lawn. However my wife, oh my, she is on my case daily about it during the summer months. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/55 "2016-07-20T17:23:24Z")
> [@gnoitall](#): > > I like having a lawn because it’s a damn fine place to exile the children when they want to play tag, or war, or race. No expensive electronics or fragile knick-knacks to break out there. It’s true now (52-year-old father of three children under the age of 11), and it was true 20 years ago (as a 32-year-old father of three children under the age of 11). > > I don’t attach much emotion or ego in the lawn, mind you. It’s just practical to have some greenspace under my direct supervision. Our lawn is used for similar purpose. However, I have noticed over the years, if a lawn is used as the kids’ playground it doesn’t stay that beautiful, even expanse of rolling green grass and quickly takes on that barren lot terrain suitable for kids playing. Soccer balls are a great way to kill grass. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/56 "2016-07-20T17:26:57Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > It deters would-be robbers. So you purposely keep your house looking like a shit hole in the practically no chance that you will be robbed? ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/57 "2016-07-20T18:15:01Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > So you purposely keep your house looking like a shit hole in the practically no chance that you will be robbed? I’m thinking it’s more like they purposely keep their house looking like a wildlife preserve with dangerous carnivores lurking in the ample underbrush. “Beware of predator” ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/58 "2016-07-20T18:39:13Z")
> [@davida03801](#): > > As a guy I have a hard time getting worked up about the status of the lawn. However my wife, oh my, she is on my case daily about it during the summer months. We’re the opposite. My husband starts fretting if the lawn guy hasn’t been here in exactly two weeks. Me, I figure if he comes twice a month, does it matter if he’s on a set schedule? As long as the grass is short-ish? Also a lot of people here seem to see only two options: perfectly manicured, green, lush lawn, or WASTELAND. I cut my grass (or have it cut) regularly. I just don’t care if it’s not a perfect emerald green, or if there are dandelions, or other pretty flowering weeds in it. ---
**Author:** ![GunnarFranz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/da6949/32.png) [@GunnarFranz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GunnarFranz)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/59 "2016-07-20T18:44:29Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > Some places, like in the northeastern US, lawns are not “an environmental disaster” and don’t even need much irrigation. And they’re desirable if you have children. Being from this region, I can attest that the input is minimal. As a lawn-liker, it is as much about aesthetics as anything. I wouldn’t call myself obsessive but fourth to your spouse, house and car, your lawn/landscaping is often the most readily apparent façade for judgment by your peers. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2016, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360/60 "2016-07-20T18:49:15Z")
Another thing. In some places without connections to municipal water and sewage systems, homeowners need to have wells drilled for water, and septic tanks and leaching fields for sewage. These need to be separated, of course, and so in these places the minimum lot sizes are an acre or more. That much land has to be covered with something. But I don’t think you can’t have trees over your septic tank and leaching field, so people have lawns over them. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-old-men-like-lawns/760360.md?page=4)