# Why do people find their airline seatmates so intollerable? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 17, 2004, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365 "2004-11-17T23:02:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2004, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/21 "2004-11-18T14:43:24Z")
> [@threemae](#): > > In another thread, someone was pitting a jackass of a seatmate on an airline. Sure, I can understand pitting an individual, but all sorts of people came in to tell of how they absolutely refused to talk to anyone about anything aboard an airplane unless they were a highly attractive member of the opposite sex. I see you read my post šŸ†’ Most others here nailed it. Iā€™ll just quote a couple of them, as nothing I can add will say it better. All apply. > [@fetus](#): > > I donā€™t make a special effort to socialize with people on an airplane, just because itā€™s so easy to get into a situation where youā€™re stuck talking to someone you donā€™t want to talk to, for hours. > [@continuity eror](#): > > Iā€™m just not a social person. I donā€™t like making ā€œsmall talkā€ at all, but I especially donā€™t like making it with a person Iā€™m never going to see again. > [@FilmGeek](#): > > Iā€™m a plane sleeper. As soon as weā€™ve taken off, Iā€™m out like a light, most times. > [@Nametag](#): > > Because in other human interactions, you can walk away from the annoying people, or at least step back a bit. A full plane flight MAKES you sit RIGHT NEXT to the annoying person, and TRAPS you there for HOURS. Itā€™s best to remain silent and miss a possible friendship, rather than speak and invite hours of verbal torture. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2004, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/22 "2004-11-18T14:55:19Z")
I donā€™t _completely_ ignore the person next to me, but itā€™s rare for me to offer more than a ā€˜helloā€™ or offer to put items in the overhead for ladies or older persons. My seat mate is already way too close to my personal space, and if I find them annoying or boorish, itā€™s a dreadful combination. An ipod with isolation headphones works wonders. Iā€™ve had more losses then wins when with seat mates: - One guy had to be arrested upon landing after threatening the stewardess, and following that threatened me when I told him to leave her alone. - Iā€™ve had multiple supersized persons take up a portion of my seat, often with the arm rest up because it simply could not come down. - Iā€™ve been stepped on by a not too-agile tourist who tried to hurdle me as opposed to asking me to move so he could get up. - Iā€™ve had women dig their nails into me during takeoff, landing, and turbulence. Iā€™ve also had women expose themselves and one delightful young lady take off her shoes so she could touch me with her bare feet. Iā€™m as hetero as the make them, but even I was uncomfortable. Who wants to involuntarily sport wood in 3A? - I had my eye poked by a walking stick. - More spills and trips to the drycleaner than I can count I can think of only 2 people who I met and had real conversations with during a flight. I fly 80 to 100 segments a year. ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2004, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/23 "2004-11-18T15:13:42Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Itā€™s a common situation with grizzly bears during salmon feeding. If theyā€™d feed me salmon during a crowded flight, Iā€™d act less like a grizzly bear. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2004, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/24 "2004-11-18T15:18:41Z")
Flyimg is often a source of fear & tension for a great many people. This creates an atmosphere of tension, as the other passengers sense it, & respond. Flights are alway much, much worse near a person who is _really_ freaked about heights. ---
**Author:** ![threemae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f9b8f/32.png) [@threemae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threemae)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2004, 7:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/25 "2004-11-19T07:02:41Z")
Wow, Iā€™ve flown a decent amount I guess, but I just havenā€™t had the bad experiences that you all have had. Maybe I am _that guy._ Iā€™ll be seeing _you_ soon. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2004, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/26 "2004-11-19T13:55:50Z")
Iā€™ll pitch in, too - Iā€™m a young woman who has almost always flown alone. Well, there is always some guy who thinks I need to be rescued that I must be some kind of DID, and I wonā€™t survive if he doesnā€™t lend me his STRONG ARM right then. Needless to say I find this annoying. Iā€™m quite cable of getting of the plane. I may look innocent, but Iā€™m not. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2004, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/27 "2004-11-19T14:29:01Z")
> [@Ghanima](#): > > For example, Iā€™ve had to: > -spend the entire flight sitting sideways because the guy sitting next to me was pretending to read but kept stroking his elbow up and down my breast. I thought I recognized you. šŸ˜ƒ On behalf of decent (and yet still single) guys, let me apologize for this schmuck. Itā€™s guys like him that give the rest of us bad reputations. Iā€™m a social person. Iā€™ll talk to everyone. Not necessarily on a plane, as I generally have no desire to, other than a wisecrack or two. That said, though, I donā€™t mind conversing with someone on a plane. Then again, Iā€™ve also never flown more than 2, 2 1/2 hours at a time. This thread reminds me of Dave Barryā€™s comment in _In Cyberspace_: > [@](#): > > I carry my laptop computer everywhere, and Iā€™ve found it to be an invaluable tool for getting into deadly no-escape conversations with friendly people sitting next to me on long plane trips. You know those friendly, Forrest Gump-like people who get on cross-country flights with absolutely nothing to read or do, so that after they have studied the barf bag (this takes them about 20 minutes) they start to prey, leechlike, on the passengers around them for entertainment? I am always - apparently it is an FAA regulation - seated next to these people. When I pull out my laptop computer, they become fascinated. And why not? Itā€™s even more interesting than a barf bag! > > They stare at for a while, and then we have a conversation like this: > > _ **Friendly Person** (gesturing at the computer, which is obviously a computer)_: Is that a computer? > _ **Me:** _ Yes. > _(Having determined that we are really hitting it off, the friendly person leans over and peers closely at the screen. I really, really hate it when people look at what Iā€™m writing; much of the time, I donā€™t even want to look at what Iā€™m writing, because itā€™s usually some semi-random collection of words desperately trying to form themselves into a joke. I try to appear busy, so that the friendly person wil realize that Iā€™m working and leave me alone, but this never happens.) > **Friendly Person:** _ So, whatā€™re you doing? > _ **Me:** _ Writing. > _(I turn busily back to my computer, although now I canā€™t think of anything to write, because Iā€™m just waiting for the friendly person to sayā€¦) > **Friendly Person:** _ What are you writing? > _ **Me:** _ A newspaper column. > _Now of course the friendly person wants to read the column. I try to turn the computer screen away from him, but this only causes him to lean over even closer, so that heā€™s practically in my seat.) > **Friendly Person** (reading):_ Whatā€™s a ā€œboger?ā€ > _ **Me:** _ Itā€™s not ā€œboger.ā€ Itā€™s ā€œbooger.ā€ > _ **Friendly Person** (loud enough so that other passengers turn to look:_ ā€œBooger?ā€ > _ **Me:** _ Yes. > _ **Friendly Person** (a little suspiciously):_ What kind of newspaper do you work for? > > My feeling is, if the airlines want to appeal to the frequent flyer, they should stop advertising that they have comfortable seats, and start advertising that they have _ejection_ seats. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2004, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/28 "2004-11-19T15:27:11Z")
> [@threemae](#): > > Wow, Iā€™ve flown a decent amount I guess, but I just havenā€™t had the bad experiences that you all have had. Maybe I am _that guy._ No, Iā€™m the same way. I fly EVERY WEEK and I havenā€™t any idea what these people are complaining about - a geniunely combative passenger who assaults you is one thing, but these other minor things are no big deal. I just go with the flow and everything is fine. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2004, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/29 "2004-11-19T15:45:03Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > No, Iā€™m the same way. I fly EVERY WEEK and I havenā€™t any idea what these people are complaining about - a geniunely combative passenger who assaults you is one thing, but these other minor things are no big deal. I just go with the flow and everything is fine. If you donā€™t _see one_, Then you must _be one!_šŸ˜›šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2004, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365/30 "2004-11-19T16:46:28Z")
> [@Waverly](#): > > My seat mate is already way too close to my personal space, and if I find them annoying or boorish, itā€™s a dreadful combination. > > ā€¦ > > Who wants to involuntarily sport wood in 3A? Wow. If youā€™re having such a rotten time up in First, youā€™d just \*DIE \* if you had to take a middle seat in Coach. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-people-find-their-airline-seatmates-so-intollerable/275365.md?page=1)