# Why do you hate me? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 9, 2013, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827 "2013-02-09T23:02:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/41 "2013-02-10T20:33:48Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > \ > Nice. And I am totally being sarcastic. But you’ve made the book.\ Yay! I made the book! I can die happy! 🙂 Now I don’t hate you any more. But I do hate your book. ---
**Author:** ![dexter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dc4da7/32.png) [@dexter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dexter)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/42 "2013-02-10T20:34:46Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > Because you destroyed the small village where I’m from and stole the sacred crystal that protects us Well, in all fairness, the crystal didn’t seem to work anyway. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/43 "2013-02-10T20:42:42Z")
It’s the leather pants. You are not, quote, “bringing sexy back”. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/44 "2013-02-10T20:45:59Z")
I hate you because you add a nose to your smileys because you don’t have a small petite nose. I hate you because you’re sense of right and wrong as well as your sense of humor has kept you from ever holding anything more than an entry level job. I hate you because you always gamble on the wrong things, never gamble on the right things, and never believe yourself when you should. I hate you because you Are funny, but you’ve never brought a nickle home to show for it. I hate you because you only answer brow-beatings with a guilty look. I hate you because you look 20 years older than you are but are like someone 20 years younger than you are. I hate you because no matter how hard you try, you can never succeed. I hate you because even knowing that, you never stop trying. I. Just. Hate. You. No wait… thats all me. You’re fine. Never mind. ---
**Author:** ![Merneith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Merneith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merneith)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/45 "2013-02-10T21:06:35Z")
I hate you because you’re beautiful. ---
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/46 "2013-02-10T21:57:16Z")
> [@LavenderBlue](#): > > You declawed your cat and circumcized your son. We all voted. You’re not allowed near sharp things ever again. You should have done it the other way around. Then I would love you. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/47 "2013-02-10T22:09:47Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > in fact I think that you should be skinny dipping in mall fountains at least three times a week. I had to quit doing that—those pennies that people throw in there kept getting stuck to my ass. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/48 "2013-02-10T22:22:31Z")
I hate you because I pretty much hate humanity as a whole, so what’s one more. ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/49 "2013-02-10T22:26:09Z")
[quote=“Happy\_Lendervedder, post:35, topic:649827”] Try again. This will never make the book. See, you’re back again, always wanting more. You’re a f\*cking whore for verbal abuse. You’re like Bill Murray in “Bob”. You just don’t get it, do you? I know you want me to use stronger language against you. But I won’t. I know how this tortures you. Pest.😛 ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/50 "2013-02-10T23:16:30Z")
It’s because you’re planning to publish a memoir which I am supposed to help write, whereas I have not published my own memoir. But you know what? You’re not worth it. Oh, wait, you wanted an itemized list - hold on… 1. It’s because you’re planning to publish a memoir which I am supposed to help write, whereas I have not published my own memoir. ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2013, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/51 "2013-02-10T23:46:24Z")
I hate you because of the thing you did to that bagpiper. Don’t get me wrong, he totally deserved it, but you should have cleaned up afterwards. Also, you have a stupid, stupid face. > [@YogSosoth](#): > > Because you destroyed the small village where I’m from and stole the sacred crystal that protects us You sure that wasn’t me? Because I’ve destroyed a lot of small villages and stolen a lot of sacred objects. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2013, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/52 "2013-02-11T18:55:52Z")
Dang, y’all are a bunch of jerks. I thought that all those things were off limits. Way to hit below the belt. Dang. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2013, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/53 "2013-02-11T20:15:52Z")
Another reason I hate you…you’re happy all the time. Obviously, you’ve got The Good Stuff and you aren’t Sharing. ---
**Author:** ![dexter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dc4da7/32.png) [@dexter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dexter)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2013, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/54 "2013-02-11T21:09:09Z")
Of course, the penultimate reason you are hated is the way you vedder the lenders. You are so compulsive about it (and happy). ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2013, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/55 "2013-02-12T02:31:36Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > Dang, y’all are a bunch of jerks. I thought that all those things were off limits. Way to hit below the belt. > > Dang. You say, ‘Tell me why you hate me!’ and we tell you. Then you say ‘Wah, wah, wah, you can’t talk about those things! I’m stupid, and lame, and I smell bad!’\* That is one of the many, many reasons why _ **I** _ hate you… you dick. \*I don’t actually listen to anything you say anything you say anymore because you’re such a cry-baby. If I’m wrong you don’t have my apologies because you really, really suck… you bastard. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2013, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/56 "2013-02-12T02:37:20Z")
> [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](#): > > You say, ‘Tell me why you hate me!’ and we tell you. Then you say ‘Wah, wah, wah, you can’t talk about those things! I’m stupid, and lame, and I smell bad!’\* That is one of the many, many reasons why _ **I** _ hate you… you dick. > > \*I don’t actually listen to anything you say anything you say anymore because you’re such a cry-baby. If I’m wrong you don’t have my apologies because you really, really suck… you bastard. Oh I wasn’t talking to you. That bagpiper thing? Totally within bounds for your hatred. ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2013, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/57 "2013-02-12T05:14:21Z")
I hate you because of your race, politics, religion, gender, and sexual orientation. I hate you because you are not exactly like me. I also hate you because you started such a lame-ass thread, which has turned out to be quite entertaining. ---
**Author:** ![dba\_Fred](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c37758/32.png) [@dba\_Fred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dba_Fred)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 8:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827/58 "2013-02-13T08:23:28Z")
Joan Jett hates herself for loving you, leaving me to love myself for hating you. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-do-you-hate-me/649827.md?page=2)