# Why does this forum allow member complaints?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856
**Category:** About This Message Board
**Created:** [November 8, 2010, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856 "2010-11-08T01:58:19Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Sister\_Vigilante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sister_Vigilante)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/1 "2010-11-08T01:58:19Z")
This forum should be about what this board is about. Message board issues. Not for complaints. If the Dope wants a complaint forum, add one. This should not be the place.
I prefer complaints be handled privately. I don’t like the obvious pitting of mods in this forum. Do it privately, through normal channels. Take it to an admin if necessary. Stop lambasting them in public. I don’t care to see it. It makes you look like an ass, even if you’re right. And believe me, sometimes you are right. But you still look like an ass.
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### Author:  [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/2 "2010-11-08T02:05:54Z")
Seriously, what’s with all the mod asskissing lately? They make stupid, unfair judgments sometimes, they deserve to be called on them. End of story.
I also don’t get the whole “complain in private” thing. Do you know what happens when you complain about a mod in private? Nothing. They smirk at your complaint and then ignore it. Take it to another mod and they side with the original mod in question and both of them ignore you.
> [@Sister\_Vigilante](#):
>
> I don’t care to see it.
Then read something else. Problem solved.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/3 "2010-11-08T02:14:07Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#):
>
> Seriously, what’s with all the mod asskissing lately? They make stupid, unfair judgments sometimes, they deserve to be called on them. End of story.
>
> I also don’t get the whole “complain in private” thing. Do you know what happens when you complain about a mod in private? Nothing. They smirk at your complaint and then ignore it. Take it to another mod and they side with the original mod in question and both of them ignore you.
Actually, the most you can claim, because you cannot access the private correspondence between the mods and other posters, is that this may happen to _you_. Because we have only your word on what happens in private between you and the mods, the rest of us can either conclude that this happens to a lot of people like you claim and that you are brave soul bringing to light a grave injustice, or that what you are claiming never happened to you, _or_ that this happens to you alone for perhaps a very good reason.
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### Author:  [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/4 "2010-11-08T02:34:25Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> Actually, the most you can claim, because you cannot access the private correspondence between the mods and other posters, is that this may happen to _you_
Duh. I can only base my observations on “my own experiences,” and in “my own experiences” mods have ignored all of my complaints. Thus, I conclude that the mods ignore complaints. A+B=C.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/5 "2010-11-08T04:04:14Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#):
>
> Duh. I can only base my observations on “my own experiences,” and in “my own experiences” mods have ignored all of my complaints. Thus, I conclude that the mods ignore complaints. A+B=C.
Question for the mods-would shortening his quote to just the first sentence be inappropriate?
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### Author:  [@Mother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mother)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/6 "2010-11-08T05:26:19Z")
Amen, Sister! I wholeheartedly agree, especially with the “makes you look like an ass” part.
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### Author:  [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/7 "2010-11-08T05:28:52Z")
I mostly get decent answers from when I PM the staff. I mean, sure they make some gaffes sometime, but who doesn’t?
I post on a lot of boards, and overall the staff here is damn good.
Mind you, when I first started lurking here, things were pretty damn scary.
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### Author:  [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/8 "2010-11-08T06:00:11Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#):
>
> Seriously, what’s with all the mod asskissing lately?
In what universe is the constant litany of complaints and accusations of wrongdoing ‘asskissing’?
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### Author:  [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/9 "2010-11-08T06:14:01Z")
We used to be able to Pit the mods in the BBQ Pit, and they’d fight back just as hard. I don’t agree that disagreements with mods should be hidden; that’s a good way to make it look like everyone thinks everything is just fine, all the time. Sometimes it’s good to know that a whole bunch of people are thinking that something is rotten.
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### Author:  [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/10 "2010-11-08T06:30:40Z")
Yeah, the pit used to be awesome back when they trusted us with grownup words and mod pittings.
But this foam sword and the ball pit are just as good. _WHIFF WHIFF_
☹
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### Author:  [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/11 "2010-11-08T08:35:12Z")
I always assumed it was because the SDMB, despite what some people think, does strive to be a fair place. Any authority that you cannot question is likely to become a problem, even if they don’t intentionally abuse their power. Mods are human, and mistakes will be made.
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### Author:  [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/12 "2010-11-08T11:35:53Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#):
>
> Duh. I can only base my observations on “my own experiences,” and in “my own experiences” mods have ignored all of my complaints. Thus, I conclude that the mods ignore complaints. A+B=C.
Actually, we do act on many complaints.
We also get many complaints that are baseless, and we generally don’t act on those. However, if we get a complaint by PM or email, we pass them around in the mod email, to ask for other opinions about the complaint.
Your conclusion is false, because you didn’t have enough info.
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### Author:  [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/13 "2010-11-08T12:37:56Z")
We allow those things because they keep our actions more transparent and hopefully increase people’s understanding of the rules, since they establish some precedents. Plenty of questions and complaints are handled in private, but coordinating those things in emails and private messages between all the moderators would probably be a pain.
> [@kidneyfailure](#):
>
> Do you know what happens when you complain about a mod in private? Nothing. They smirk at your complaint and then ignore it.
False. You once asked asked me to take back a warning I gave you. I didn’t ignore you, which you know because in another recent thread, you quoted a little bit of a private message I sent you explaining why I was not taking back the warning. We don’t ignore all complaints in private. You just did not convince me to reverse your warning (and you didn’t persuade **twickster** that the decision that preceeded your warning was wrong). I’ve reversed decisions based on ATMB postings and on emails and private messages. I think just about everybody on the staff has done that. They’re equally effective in getting complaints addressed.
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### Author:  [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/14 "2010-11-08T13:16:28Z")
If you think that any complaint made in public, regardless of how justified or politely worded, makes the complainer look like an ass then I’m afraid that you are the one with the problem.
Hashing it out in public lets the mods and other posters get a sense of the validity of the complaint. I think in many cases that’s a good thing.
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### Author:  [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/15 "2010-11-08T13:52:18Z")
> [@CarnalK](#):
>
> If you think that any complaint made in public, regardless of how justified or politely worded, makes the complainer look like an ass then I’m afraid that you are the one with the problem.
Probably true. On the other hand, since no one has posted an idea that even resembles this remark, it would appear that this comment was misplaced from another thread. 😛
(The “look like an ass” comment was in reference to “lambasting” staff, not in reference to any and all complaints.)
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### Author:  [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/16 "2010-11-08T13:56:06Z")
There’s very little that gets decided behind the scenes by Mods that would do harm if it were discussed openly in public.
Except as far as Mods getting embarrassed over mistakes or deliberate abuses of their powers goes. Personally, I think that would act as a check on Mods doing dumb (or evil) shit, but obviously the Mods are far more interested in having their embarrassing moments miminized than in providing incentives for them to act judiciously and well. More’s the pity.
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### Author:  [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/17 "2010-11-08T13:58:54Z")
> [@BigT](#):
>
> I always assumed it was because the SDMB, despite what some people think, does strive to be a fair place. Any authority that you cannot question is likely to become a problem, even if they don’t intentionally abuse their power. Mods are human, and mistakes will be made.
This.
The great thing about this board’s moderation – and it’s not perfect, as mods and ex-mods will be the first to tell you – is that it’s _moderate_ and nuanced. neither “We are the All-Knowing Elite, to question whose decisions is tantamount to high treason” and who enforce Da Roolz zealously and to the maximum amount possible – which is always a tendency, and one endemic to a team privileged to wield authority, and which ha come close to destroying many other boards – nor at the other extreme the “anything goes except child porn and other blatant illegalities” laissez-faire _Moddus otiosus_. The mods here enforce rules, but realize they’re enforcing them on real people. If somebody reacts to an insult in GQ in kind clearly out of momentary anger, they’re likely to get a gentle reminder not to, not a one-size-fits-all Cease and Desist warning. There’s surprisingly little us-vs-them here; we’re Dopers first, members and staff much later if at all.
That’'s not to say we haven’t had our problems: **Marley** seemed to be going through a short bout of “If it moves, warn it” several months back (he’s gotten over it IMO), and all three of the Charter Admins. have had doses of “siege mentality – they’re out to get us!” show up in their posted comments, then recovered from it and regained their equilibrium. (If I were **Tubadiva** , I’d take a week or two of voluntary leave of absence from SDMB management, as opposed to her front-page duties, now that **Lynn** is back on active duty – in my considered opinion as someone who cares both about the SDMB and about the woman who’s given more of herself than any other volunteer for over eleven and a half years now, she’s starting to feel stressed by that ‘siege mentality’ thing again, and could use a chance to get a breather and replant her feet on level ground where she can be her normal even-tempered and genuinely caring self.)
But the point is that these are aberrations from the norm, not the norm itself – mostly there’s a balanced, thoughtful, moderate moderating style here that they, past and present, should be collectively proud of. (And that includes **Giraffe, TVeblen, Frank, Czarcasm** , and any other active-Doper former mods.)
**That’s** why this forum exists. They listen to criticism and react. It’s not us vs them, it’s All of us working together to make this place what it is, with them having authority and carrying responsibility the rest of us do not – and them realizing this and listening to complaints openly and publicly, and acting on them, again openly and publicly.
That’s damn rare on the Interwebs. And it’s one part of why I’m proud to be a Doper.
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### Author:  [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/18 "2010-11-08T14:01:06Z")
> [@tomndebb](#):
>
> (The “look like an ass” comment was in reference to “lambasting” staff, not in reference to any and all complaints.)
Nitpicky, but not all that important quibble:
> [@](#):
>
> I prefer complaints be handled privately. I don’t like the obvious pitting of mods in this forum. Do it privately, through normal channels. Take it to an admin if necessary. Stop lambasting them in public. I don’t care to see it. It makes you look like an ass, even if you’re right. And believe me, sometimes you are right. But you still look like an ass.
Lambasting in context is a subset of complaints aired in public. The OP is very clear that ALL complaints are (to her) the same as “lambasting”.
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### Author:  [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/19 "2010-11-08T14:16:01Z")
Bizarre, tomndebb, that you would say “no one has posted an idea that even resembles this remark” when any rational person could see you are just parsing the comment a little different than me. I’m inline with Fenris’ reading of the OP.
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### Author:  [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)
#### Post date: [November 8, 2010, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-does-this-forum-allow-member-complaints/559856/20 "2010-11-08T14:43:34Z")
A little hyperbole never killed anyone.
WHAT?! 😉
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