# Why Doesn't My Son's Classmate Celebrate Valentine's Day? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [February 8, 2010, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199 "2010-02-08T23:14:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Lord\_Mondegreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/91b2a8/32.png) [@Lord\_Mondegreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Mondegreen)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2010, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/61 "2010-02-10T01:36:22Z")
> [@Cunctator](#): > > I checked with my sister about the practice at my nieces’ school. It’s the same as that described by **Aspidistra**. The school doesn’t get involved in outside social events. My nieces’ birthday parties are generally fairly small affairs - 10 guests would usually be the maximum. So the majority of the class won’t be invited. And those that aren’t invited just have to get over it. That’s been the experience with my daughters too. I’ll be buggered if I’m going to be forced by the school to put on a party for 25 kids (unless the school is offering to pay for it). Particularly since a good percentage of the classes are little bastards that my daughters don’t even like. Edited to add: I worked in a small company a number of years ago. We always had a Christmas Dinner, paid for by the company. When we hired a JW we had to change the name of the occasion to an End of Year Dinner, otherwise she wouldn’t have come. ---
**Author:** ![Southern\_Yankee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/southern_yankee/32/2800_2.png) [@Southern\_Yankee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Southern_Yankee)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2010, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/62 "2010-02-10T01:51:19Z")
> [@Skara\_Brae](#): > > I remember making “mailboxes” in art class (old tissue boxes recovered with paper and the like) and we would leave them on our desks for the other kids to drop cards into…It was fun. Aw, simpler times. 😉 We did the same thing in NJ, in the '70s. ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2010, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/63 "2010-02-10T07:28:53Z")
> [@Skara\_Brae](#): > > I remember making “mailboxes” in art class (old tissue boxes recovered with paper and the like) and we would leave them on our desks for the other kids to drop cards into…It was fun. Aw, simpler times. 😉 Before your post I had completely forgotten about how we used to that too. That was fun, and I eagerly opened them all–especially from that brunette beauty in the third row–even though we all knew some of them were written at gunpoint. Thanks! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![md2000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/73ab20/32.png) [@md2000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/md2000)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2010, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/64 "2010-02-10T16:10:52Z")
One JW I knew, I heard from people he grew up with that he would stand outside the classrom when the national anthem was being sung. It’s not just religious holidays. OTOH, some Pentecostalists I knew mentioned that they thought a radio station event at the local mall was “inappropriate” because it involved kids dancing, to music, in mixed groups. That was only about 15 years ago, before their kids were teenagers… I’m sort of glad for these discussions that I went to an all-boys school and completely skipped the whole Valentines thing. Like most modern American “Hallmark Holidays”, things have become completely out of hand. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2010, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/65 "2010-02-10T16:50:30Z")
I’m in my thirties now and when I was a kid Valentines was all about the candy. As soon as I got home from school that day the cards went in the trash and I binged on the candy hearts and the chocolates. Also I didn’t know they revamped the hearts so I’ll be stopping by the store today to pick some up and also to get some chocolate cherry cordials. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2010, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/66 "2010-02-10T17:49:44Z")
> [@SmartAlecCat](#): > > [Despair, Inc. - Demotivators®, The World’s Best Demotivational Posters](http://despair.com/bittersweets.html) Cool. What about St. Patrick’s Day? While it’s still a religious holiday in Ireland, here in the U.S. people mostly go out and get drunk on green beer. Or it’s time for McDonalds’ shamrock shakes. (Damn, I love those things) ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2010, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/67 "2010-02-11T00:23:26Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > Mind you, this everybody-gives-to-everybody custom is comparatively recent in most American schools, AFAIK. It was the rule in our school as far back as 1975. > [@Aspidistra](#): > > Do US schools tend to have a policy with that? A number of kids in my daughter’s class handed out cards last christmas (I’m sure we never did this when I was in primary school, but then, I think the vast majority of these were parent-written, and I don’t think most parents had time for that back in the 70’s) Would that also be disallowed-unless-to-all? In the schools I’ve been in (since 1975, as I said above) the general rule was that if you were going to be handing _anything_ out in class, be it invitations, treats, or holiday cards, you should be handing them out to everyone. Any other inviting or gift-giving would have to be done outside of the classroom. ---
**Author:** ![Jinx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Jinx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jinx)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2010, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/68 "2010-02-11T00:49:40Z")
Then, are birthday celebrations pagan? I understand they do not recognize birthdays. ---
**Author:** ![obfusciatrist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4af34b/32.png) [@obfusciatrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/obfusciatrist)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2010, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/69 "2010-02-11T01:37:51Z")
No, not really pagan (or at least I don’t recall pagan issues ever being raised). The birthdays thing is pretty much guilt by association and following the lead in the bible. There are no accounts in the bible of Christians celebrating birthdays and in the two Biblical accounts of birthday celebrations, horrible things were done. No Christmas because of the pagan roots for the date and many trappings of the celebration, it isn’t actually Jesus’s birthday, they don’t celebrate birthdays and it is a form of idolatry (JWs are not trinitarians, Jesus is not god). Also, Christmas celebrations were not part of the early church they feel is a more correct form that has been corrupted. No Easter because they don’t commemorate Jesus’s resurrection but rather his death (that is why Memorial is on the same day as Passover). They feel there is scriptural support for doing it this way. Also the pagan trappings. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2010, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/70 "2010-02-12T04:30:39Z")
It’s sounding like these kids who don’t get to participate in a school activity, or in multiple holidays, because their parents don’t believe in participating. Don’t the parents feel guilty for depriving their kids of fun? Or of forcing their beliefs on their kids? I live by some pretty rigid religious rules (but I call them ‘principles’ or ‘beliefs’ to justify them). But what would give me the right to force someone else to follow my beliefs? And if I care about my kids, and want them to have faith, aren’t I undermining that by forcing them to follow rules without making their own decisions? I’m getting upset just thinking about over-controlling parents… which would apply to an atheist family not wanting Billy to get Christmas presents, or tree-hugger parents shunning little Buffy because she wants to waste paper celebrating Valentine’s Day. This might be worth its own thread. Coming soon to a Pit near you… ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2010, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/71 "2010-02-12T04:56:19Z")
> [@BrightNShiny](#): > > I’m a Hindu, and I’m pissed off about Valentine’s day because I have nobody to smooch. ☹ Move here and you can be upset thrice! Korea has Valentines Day (February 14) for girls to give gifts to guys, [White Day](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Day) for guys to give gifts to girls, and [Pepero Day (November 11)](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pepero_Day) for girls and guys to give Pepero to each other. Or you could just commiserate with other lonely hearts on [Black Day (April 14)](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Day). ---
**Author:** ![Dog80](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6bbea6/32.png) [@Dog80](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dog80)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/72 "2010-02-15T12:20:11Z")
In Greece too (and I assume most of Europe) St. Valentines is the day you buy an inflatable butt plug and bondage equipment to your girlfriend. Definitely not for kids. ---
**Author:** ![Palo\_Verde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/65b543/32.png) [@Palo\_Verde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palo_Verde)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2010, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/73 "2010-02-16T01:40:46Z")
My Kindergarten son’s teacher told them not to exchange cards for very dumb PC type reasons. She declared it was all just a plot by the card companies to make money. The disappointment in the kids eyes was pitiful to see. We made Valentines out of red construction paper cut into hearts with stickers on them and gave them out anyway. ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2010, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199/74 "2010-02-16T02:38:24Z")
You guys are missing a very important detail here: The list of classmates specifically said to all that Ashley doesn’t celebrate Valentine’s which, I assume, would leave her open to the mockery of all of the less-enlightened students in the class. That is, unless kids have become much more tolerant than they were in my day (early 80’s). We had a performance at school (those types where the whole class sings songs while your parents sit in the audience and take pictures) before X-mas one year where the music teacher asked us all to wear Santa hats. A JW classmate couldn’t do it and was mercilessly made fun of for it (not by me, of course. I was a nerd who was also made fun of mercilessly, so I silently sympathized with her but said nothing, fearing retribution. In my defence: I was only 8). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-doesnt-my-sons-classmate-celebrate-valentines-day/528199.md?page=3)