# Why don't Americans use "mate" when talking to others? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 8, 2016, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576 "2016-04-08T18:32:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2016, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/41 "2016-04-09T03:25:05Z")
I think we’re all overlooking the real issue, which is the _blatant_ misuse of l33t moderator powers which allowed **RickJay** to multipost posts #18 and 19 within a minute of each other. ---
**Author:** ![Nars\_Glinley](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nars_glinley/32/8177_2.png) [@Nars\_Glinley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nars_Glinley)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2016, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/42 "2016-04-09T08:20:57Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > I think we’re all overlooking the real issue, which is the _blatant_ misuse of l33t moderator powers which allowed **RickJay** to multipost posts #18 and 19 within a minute of each other. It was nice knowing you. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2016, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/43 "2016-04-09T12:53:02Z")
> [@TBG](#): > > If I haven’t put my penis in you, you aren’t my mate. I have lots of classmates with whom I didn’t have carnal relations. The Britishism that I can’t wrap my head around is “luv.” I’ve known two British men who would occasionally address me that way - no matter that I know it is just a throw-away phrase that didn’t mean they loved me, it still freaked me out every time. ---
**Author:** ![JustinC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justinc/32/8083_2.png) [@JustinC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustinC)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2016, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/44 "2016-04-09T13:20:39Z")
> [@CairoCarol](#): > > I have lots of classmates with whom I didn’t have carnal relations. > > The Britishism that I can’t wrap my head around is “luv.” I’ve known two British men who would occasionally address me that way - no matter that I know it is just a throw-away phrase that didn’t mean they loved me, it still freaked me out every time. It’s a northern English term of affection, without any underlying connotations. Also used are ‘petal’, ‘flower’, ‘pet’, ‘darlin’', ‘honey’, ‘hun’, ‘sweetie’, ‘duck’, ‘poppet’, ‘treacle’, ‘duckie’, ‘chief’, ‘squire’, ‘guv’, ‘boss’ and ‘geezer’. The usage will vary depending on which part of England you’re in. I was out in the most violent town (per capita) in England - Keighley - and was in a club which was pretty rough, you could sense the underlying tension. Someone dropped a bottle which missed me by an inch or two, I ran up the stairs but no one was looking for a confrontation (maybe it was a mistake), coming back down I stepped aside for a mean looking, lean drunk and he growled at me “Cheers, flower.” The town has a great rugby team, the Keighley Cougars, and I guess people take their violence quite seriously. I was in a Blockbusters and looked out across the street, it was about 1 in the afternoon on a Saturday, and four guys tumbled out the pub opposite and were fighting. Shoppers and women with prams had to step around them as they continue wrestling each other on the pavement. Hardly anyone gave them a second look and continued on their way. So, yeah, ‘luv’ is just a part of the language and not meant in the carnal sense. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2016, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/45 "2016-04-09T15:31:43Z")
The US is [home](http://bridgedeck.org) to the International Organization of Masters, Mates & Pilots. We tend to associate the term with seamen. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2016, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/46 "2016-04-10T07:30:28Z")
> [@JustinC](#): > > Also used are ‘petal’, ‘flower’, ‘pet’, ‘darlin’', ‘honey’, ‘hun’, ‘sweetie’, ‘duck’, ‘poppet’, ‘treacle’, ‘duckie’, ‘chief’, ‘squire’, ‘guv’, ‘boss’ and ‘geezer’. The usage will vary depending on which part of England you’re in. I’ve read _some_ of those terms in the mystery novels I like to read, but did not know that something like “pet” or “flower” might be used. And I also thought some were only used by grandmotherly women, and/or when talking to children. Fortunately neither of the British gentlemen who would occasionally call me “luv” ever used some of those other terms. I could process “luv” after a moment or two, but “darlin” would have had me worried… ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2016, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/47 "2016-04-10T07:50:08Z")
> [@JustinC](#): > > It’s a northern English term of affection, without any underlying connotations. Also used are ‘petal’, ‘flower’, ‘pet’, ‘darlin’', ‘honey’, ‘hun’, ‘sweetie’, ‘duck’, ‘poppet’, ‘treacle’, ‘duckie’, ‘chief’, ‘squire’, ‘guv’, ‘boss’ and ‘geezer’. The usage will vary depending on which part of England you’re in. I’m told that in Devon it has been known for policemen, when restraining offenders and issuing traffic tickets, to address the miscreant as “my lover”. The Great Australian Mateship may well date back to the earliest days when transported convicts were in as much danger from each other as from the brutal conditions in which many of them were held, and needed an absolutely reliable ally. Given their circumstances, in some settlements, there are plenty of reports of this extending into much more physical relationships. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2016, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/48 "2016-04-10T08:20:06Z")
I think Australian politician [Bronwyn Bishop](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bronwyn_Bishop) gave a good insight into the use of “mate” in Australia. She is one of those people I wouldn’t imagine would ever use the word however I heard her interviewed on the radio once. She was asked why Australia was going along with an action by New Zealand that didn’t accord with US wishes. “Well, New Zealand are our mates,” she replied. The interviewer then asserted that surely the US were our mates too. Bishop replied, “They are very important friends but I don’t think we would call them mates.” I was amazed. Oddly the comment didn’t seem to get much coverage at all. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Gadai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@An\_Gadai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Gadai)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2016, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/49 "2016-04-10T13:16:35Z")
Bud, mate, man, dude, chief, boss and sir are all used in Ireland. ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2016, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/50 "2016-04-11T05:26:59Z")
I’d have to toss in a vote for dude being our version of mate. Not the same, but almost used the same. Duuuuuude. ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2016, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/51 "2016-04-11T06:53:26Z")
There’s also “bro”. It seems to me most millennials use that nowadays rather than “dude”. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2016, 8:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/52 "2016-04-11T08:41:34Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > We tend to associate the term with seamen. _snerk_ I think only Cockneys and South Africans use “China” for their mates. ---
**Author:** ![JustinC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justinc/32/8083_2.png) [@JustinC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustinC)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2016, 9:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/53 "2016-04-11T09:26:18Z")
> [@PatrickLondon](#): > > I’m told that in Devon it has been known for policemen, when restraining offenders and issuing traffic tickets, to address the miscreant as “my lover”. > > The Great Australian Mateship may well date back to the earliest days when transported convicts were in as much danger from each other as from the brutal conditions in which many of them were held, and needed an absolutely reliable ally. Given their circumstances, in some settlements, there are plenty of reports of this extending into much more physical relationships. Yeah, I can really see Bruce, Mad Max, Wayne, Croc Dundee, Wayne, Bruce, and Bruce getting it on :rolleyes: Also ‘mate’ is used in the UK a lot, between men mostly, without any connotations apart from platonic friendship. > [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > I think Australian politician [Bronwyn Bishop](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bronwyn_Bishop) gave a good insight into the use of “mate” in Australia. She is one of those people I wouldn’t imagine would ever use the word however I heard her interviewed on the radio once. She was asked why Australia was going along with an action by New Zealand that didn’t accord with US wishes. > > “Well, New Zealand are our mates,” she replied. The interviewer then asserted that surely the US were our mates too. Bishop replied, “They are very important friends but I don’t think we would call them mates.” > > I was amazed. Oddly the comment didn’t seem to get much coverage at all. Not so odd, the number of people who are working/have worked in NZ who are originally from Oz and vice versa over the years runs into millions. Just as the US and Canada are closer than the US and Oz (physically, metaphorically, culturally etc), plus Oz and NZ share a lot of restrictions being so far from the major, western continents. ---
**Author:** ![JustinC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justinc/32/8083_2.png) [@JustinC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustinC)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2016, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/54 "2016-04-11T09:30:25Z")
> [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](#): > > I’d have to toss in a vote for dude being our version of mate. Not the same, but almost used the same. > > Duuuuuude. Very close, although ‘mate’ is inter-generational and I believe ‘dude’ will mostly be used by younger guys. Don’t forget in British English ‘fag’ has no sexual connotations whatsoever, when used in place of ‘cigarette’. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2016, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/55 "2016-04-11T15:14:26Z")
[QUOTE=MrDibble;19250412I think only Cockneys and South Africans use “China” for their mates.[/QUOTE] [And](http://www.tmz.com/2016/04/11/rob-kardashian-blac-chyna-wedding-tv/) Rob Kardashian. ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2016, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/56 "2016-04-11T16:34:45Z")
As an American, yeah, I rarely hear “mate”, but I think it’s just a difference in the common vernacular. I think the best approximate usage I regularly hear is “dude” and and it’s almost always a term of endearment between friends in much the same way I understand “mate” is used. I also hear “bro/bruh/brah” sometimes and I’ve come to use it occasionally as a tongue-in-cheek sort of term, but only in those contexts, like friendly jesting at the gym. As others mentioned, I hear “man”, “boss”, “chief”, but those tend to be in different circles than I’m usually in. I do have one friend who is also American who says “mate” a lot, but I honestly don’t know where he picked it up since, as far as I know, he’s never left the country and no one else in that circle of friends says it. > [@Ranger\_Jeff](#): > > In the CG, we might call someone “shipmate”. I was a contractor at the CG for over a decade, and heard this a lot. I heard a few occasionally shorten it to just “mate”, but that was definitely the exception, not the norm. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2016, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576/57 "2016-04-11T20:02:02Z")
[quote=“PatriotGrrrl, post:33, topic:751576”] “We like to say ‘What’s up, guy?’ It’s our way to say hi. In February It is good to know a plow guy” [/QUOTE] Well played, hon. (I love when a gal half my age calls me that – it should only be used by veteran diner waitresses 🙂 .) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-americans-use-mate-when-talking-to-others/751576.md?page=2)