# Why don't I just have the damn baby at work?!? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 11, 2002, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486 "2002-03-11T04:35:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/1 "2002-03-11T04:35:43Z")
So, the new baby will be born on or before this coming Wednesday! We are very excited and can’t wait to meet him. The only real glitch is my job. I have worked just about every goddamn day since I got pregnant again- no time off for nausea, good behavior or anything else. Yes, it’s a very busy time for us, and we are a very small company, blah blah blah. But has anyone else noticed that I am NINE MONTHS PREGNANT?!? Not my boss, apparently (who also happens to be my MIL). My husband tends to forget as well (he works for us too). My toddler has no real idea, but he gets a break. Shouldn’t these be the two people who most want me taking good care of myself? For God’s sake, with my first pregnancy I was home for a month before the birth. This time, I will be lucky if the kid’s not born during a conference call… Yeah, I wanna whine, so sue me. I guess it’s because I always have great, easy pregnancies that people just assume that I don’t need rest or a friggin’ day off once in a while, because when I said that I might not go in tomorrow, I got a nice helping of guilt! Gee, who’ll mail that package if you’re not here? I have had to deal with a sick husband and a sick two-year-old for going on two weeks now (not to mention the overworked MIL), which insures that I have been getting almost no sleep, eating like crap and stressing out over stupid things. Ok, guys, here’s the deal- I don’t care if you are sick, or tired, or busy or whatever. I am preparing for the MIRACLE OF BIRTH here, and you need to give me a fucking break. Type your own emails, send your own faxes, print a document (it won’t hurt you) and let me sit on my ass for a day or two before the big event. Sheesh. I can’t wait until this baby is born, maybe I’ll get some fucking rest… :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/2 "2002-03-11T05:25:23Z")
> [@](#): > > Sheesh. I can’t wait until this baby is born, maybe I’ll get some fucking rest… Make sure you do. We’ll be expecting you back in the office, bright and early the following morning! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/3 "2002-03-11T05:36:03Z")
Would this be a good time to bring up [Pearl S. Buck](http://www.pinkmonkey.com/booknotes/monkeynotes/pmGoodEarth13.asp) and _The Good Earth_? > [@](#): > > O-Lan’s character is more fully developed when she shows pride > and strength during pregnancy. She continues to perform all her > usual chores and refuses to take any help from the great house > where she has been a slave. She goes through labor and childbirth > alone and cleans the room before emerging with her son. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/4 "2002-03-11T08:47:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by EJsGirl \* > \*\*So, the new baby will be born on or before this coming Wednesday! We are very excited and can’t wait to meet him. > \*\* Wednesday is a wonderful day to be born - and any child born then will be an absolutely amazing addition to the world. Congratulations! ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 9:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/5 "2002-03-11T09:04:56Z")
dang!!! I think I would be forced to chop someone’s head off. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/6 "2002-03-11T12:06:54Z")
Yikes! Be careful, or you might get mixed up and accidentally Fedex the baby and nurse the filing cabinet… ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/7 "2002-03-11T12:56:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by EJsGirl \* > **Gee, who’ll mail that package if you’re not here?** How about someone who’s not giving birth in TWO DAYS! Sheesh, haven’t these people heard of temps? ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/8 "2002-03-11T13:20:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duck Duck Goose \* > \*\*Would this be a good time to bring up [Pearl S. Buck](http://www.pinkmonkey.com/booknotes/monkeynotes/pmGoodEarth13.asp) and _The Good Earth_? O-Lan, for those of you who haven’t read the book, turns out to be Chinese for “doormat” :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/9 "2002-03-11T14:11:12Z")
> [@](#): > > Why don’t I just have the damn baby at work?!? Well, of course, that’s part of the plan. It’s never to soon to start training the new employee, you know. :rolleyes: Sorry to hear about this, **EJsGirl**. Anyone that close to delivering deserves the royal treatment, IMO. Here’s hoping that your labor, at least, will be easy. ---
**Author:** ![cleosia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@cleosia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cleosia)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/10 "2002-03-11T16:04:23Z")
That’s the problem with working in a family business. You get the same shit at work as you get at home. :rolleyes: (I had to play with the colors!) ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/11 "2002-03-11T16:08:47Z")
See, I thought this was gonna be a rant about your co-workers wanting to be so involved in your pregnancy. Mrs. Sauron is due in about two weeks, and she’s tired of people at her office wanting to feel the baby move. Hey, folks, if you want to feel a baby move inside a woman’s tummy, impregnate your own SO (or get pregnant yourself). My wife’s tired of being your local outlet for Feel-o-Vision. ---
**Author:** ![tisiphone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@tisiphone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tisiphone)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/12 "2002-03-11T17:23:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by EJsGirl \* > \*\* > Sheesh. I can’t wait until this baby is born, maybe I’ll get some fucking rest… > > \*\* :snicker: Bwahahahahaha! You already have one toddler, don’t tell me you honestly believe that. When I was in the hospital having my second, I told the nurses they were gonna have to pry me outta there with a crowbar, as it was the last rest I was getting for eighteen years. I’ve been right so far. Congratulations, by the way! ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/13 "2002-03-11T17:52:57Z")
God, I love you guys! I needed a great laugh for a Monday morning! And yes, I am posting from work… Although hubby has a point- he really doesn’t want me to go into labor at home by myself, with him 30+ miles away. So I guess I will do a little work and THEN kick back and relax, right? Suuuuure… 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![YWalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/6f9a4e/32.png) [@YWalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YWalker)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/14 "2002-03-11T18:22:22Z")
So who’s going to be doing this stuff once you’re in the hospital/have given birth? Are they just going to tough it out, and take on the extra duties themselves (and go out of their way to make you feel guilty with “When are you coming back” crap), or are they going to hire a temp? If it’s the latter, wouldn’t it make sense to go ahead and bring the temp on now, so that you could train him/her on what you do? (And maybe just work a few half-days to do so?) As an alternative, I guess you’re on at least once per week visits to the obstetrician now. How about doing wind sprints in the stairwells before you go in, so your blood pressure reading is high and they tell you you need to stay home and rest more? BTW, will your new kiddo be known as **EJ’sGirl’sBoy?**. Congrats, and best wishes. I hope you’re able to wangle at least a little bit of time off before the birth to have a little time to decompress and get mentally ready for the new little one. ---
**Author:** ![Abe\_Babe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ab097/32.png) [@Abe\_Babe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abe_Babe)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/15 "2002-03-11T19:56:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by EJsGirl \* > For God’s sake, with my first pregnancy I was home for a month before the birth. This time, I will be lucky if the kid’s not born during a conference call… Just be sure to turn off thespeakerphone ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/16 "2002-03-11T20:26:31Z")
YWalker, I am pretty much out of time! Of course, if I quit drinking water (get dehydrated) and do some serious walking, I could probably have the baby any time I want! But the whole point of getting to Wednesday is so that my OB can actually be there! Eh, whatever. I can always fake a couple of labor pains if they ask me to go get lunch for everybody! Which they probably will, any minute… ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2002, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/17 "2002-03-11T22:51:11Z")
Is the FedEx™ dude your lamaze coach? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Kricket](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f14d63/32.png) [@Kricket](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kricket)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2002, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/18 "2002-03-12T14:15:30Z")
You know they could just get you a laptop so you could take it right into the delivery room with you. Holy freakin’ cow! Good luck love and I hope you get some rest soon. Maybe in between contractions? ---
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2002, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/19 "2002-03-12T14:17:56Z")
And if you could be a dear and have the child during a 15-minute break, as opposed to over lunch, your co-workers would appreciate it. Thanks again. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2002, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486/20 "2002-03-13T03:49:13Z")
I know what you mean, EJ’sGirl. My boss has never had a child in her life, and has no idea that pregnancies are different. She threw a fit when I told her I can’t work OT this weekend because my landlord is spraying for bugs, and I can’t be there at all from Friday to Sunday. Too bad. Makes me glad I’m not going back after maternity leave. Robin [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-i-just-have-the-damn-baby-at-work/97486.md?page=2)