# Why don't men understand conception? Why do women lie about it? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 19, 2007, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604 "2007-06-19T16:33:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/101 "2007-06-20T18:45:34Z")
[QUOTE=Kimstu] Okay then, we cool. (And I agree with you that most men are unlikely to lie about women’s reproductive functions, though ISTM that some of them will lie about their own. Surely at least **some** of the guys who say “It’s okay honey, we don’t need to use a condom because I have a low sperm count!” or “We only need a condom for my first ejaculation in one night!” must be aware that it’s bullshit.) [/QUOTE] Yep. OTOH I have almost zero sperm count. At some point I stopped using condoms with wife- after 4 1/2 years of infertility, it seemd a bit stupid to use condoms. Never made a baby, but the paranoia was there, oh man was it. Millions of lazy water-treaders and all it would have taken was one Mark Spitz. I said one Mark Spitz. Spitz. Helloooo ? God people. As for sex during menstruation, it never squicked me out. As an added bonus, it delighted my lover that I used my tongue to create a lovely macrame with her tampon string. 😉 > [@WhyNot](#): > > Y’know how men make a bunch of stuff besides sperm in their semen? We make something similar for a few days a month, and it provides a nice slippery race track and the perfect pH environment to keep the sperm alive for a few days until the egg shows up. I wish I had small children so I could wait till that special day and then sit them down and say, " Honey, when a Race Car Driver loves a Race Car Driver very, very much… " 😛 ---
**Author:** ![LinusK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@LinusK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LinusK)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/102 "2007-06-20T20:03:44Z")
[QUOTE=Autolycus] Wait, what? I genuinely thought women could not get pregnant from a sexual act done during the period. [/QUOTE] It depends on whether you’re trying NOT to have a baby, or trying TO have one. If you’re trying NOT, then you can get pregnant anytime. If you’re trying TO, then you’d be well-advised to do it when the woman’s actually fertile. ---
**Author:** ![stretch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a6a055/32.png) [@stretch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stretch)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/103 "2007-06-20T20:06:50Z")
We don’t have all the Straight Dope on contraception yet anyway, so how is someone supposed to speak completely accurately? They are discovering that some women ovulate more than once a month. Other women are super-fertile–in my family, we get pregnant if we keep our underwear in the same drawer as the SO\*. One perfect form of birth control–no sex. It’s unreasonable to expect anyone to go through life that way. I tell my children, “Don’t have sex with anybody you don’t want to have a baby with. And always multiple forms of birth control.” My daughter got pregnant on the Pill due to interactions with antibotics and because she did not believe me when I told her to use a condom anyway. Be careful out there. \*hyperbole, but only barely. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/104 "2007-06-20T20:09:29Z")
[QUOTE=stretch] My daughter got pregnant on the Pill due to interactions with antibotics [/SIZE] [/QUOTE] Well then, perhaps she needs to interact with a nicer strain of medicines. Some medicines won’t even KISS on the first date. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Tristan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tristan/32/18058_2.png) [@Tristan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tristan)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/105 "2007-06-20T22:50:51Z")
[QUOTE=stretch] Other women are super-fertile–in my family, we get pregnant if we keep our underwear in the same drawer as the SO\*. \*hyperbole, but only barely. [/QUOTE] Ahem. “Do you _really_ keep your SO in a dresser drawer?” Sorry, I was forced too. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/106 "2007-06-20T23:01:27Z")
[QUOTE=Cheesesteak] The woman in your other story had 10 years of unprotected sex, and 1 baby, that is the kind of result you get from regular condom use. Would you be bitching as much if she insisted on using only a condom, and got pregnant, which happens all the time? You have over a 10% chance of conceiving per year with “average” condom use. [/QUOTE] Raw statistics about ‘average’ condom use are not appropriate in this comparison. A couple in a steady relationship, regularly using condoms, will both be familiar with them and also will probably receive advice at some stage on minimising the risk of problems. The ‘average’ condom use includes every teenager and one-night-stander who never quite has worked out which side is the inside. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/107 "2007-06-20T23:11:25Z")
[QUOTE=Cartooniverse] Never made a baby, but the paranoia was there, oh man was it. Millions of lazy water-treaders and all it would have taken was one Mark Spitz. I said one Mark Spitz. Spitz. Helloooo ? God people. [/QUOTE] Tough crowd. Next time maybe go with the “Greg Loug-anus” joke. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/108 "2007-06-20T23:14:35Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] As I understand it, women are really only fertile twice per year. [/QUOTE] Isn’t that true? I believe it’s when they don’t have a headache and… that other time they don’t have a headache. ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/109 "2007-06-20T23:16:36Z")
[QUOTE=IntelSoldier] Isn’t that true? I believe it’s when they don’t have a headache and… that other time they don’t have a headache. [/QUOTE] There’s another lie women tell. Sex is good for a headache IME. I get headaches pretty often, and sex is better than Advil for making them go away, at least until about 10 minutes after the sex is over. ---
**Author:** ![flight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbce88/32.png) [@flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flight)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/110 "2007-06-20T23:20:48Z")
It is so strange. When we first got together my GF always said sex was great for her migraines, now it makes them worse. Funny how that happens. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/111 "2007-06-20T23:22:20Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] There’s another lie women tell. Sex is good for a headache IME. I get headaches pretty often, and sex is better than Advil for making them go away, at least until about 10 minutes after the sex is over. [/QUOTE] Are you joking? What works for you may not work for others. I know for a fact that sex does dick (heh) for my migraines. So does Advil, for that matter. ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/112 "2007-06-20T23:23:20Z")
[QUOTE=Queen Bruin] Are you joking? [/QUOTE] Yes, in fact, I am. Thanks for checking! ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/113 "2007-06-20T23:25:19Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] There’s another lie women tell. Sex is good for a headache IME. I get headaches pretty often, and sex is better than Advil for making them go away, at least until about 10 minutes after the sex is over. [/QUOTE] And this is where you are giving off an unintentional antagonistic vibe here. You experience isn’t enough of a basis to call other women liars. And I don’t think you mean that it is. But when you say That’s a “lie women tell”, it sounds like you are setting your self up as an authority on what women think/believe/experience because you happen to be one. And that raises people’s hackles. Surely you can see why? ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/114 "2007-06-20T23:26:25Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] Yes, in fact, I am. Thanks for checking! [/QUOTE] In future, you may want to be more explicit than that. Just trying to be helpful. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2007, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/115 "2007-06-20T23:33:06Z")
I’m too lazy to check the whole thread to see if anyone mentioned that it doesn’t, in fact, take just one sperm. Sure, one sperm _fertilizes_ the egg, but that’s like saying that only the running back scored the touchdown. He needed the whole team. In fact, it takes hundreds of sperm to wear down the egg’s jelly coat enough so one can get in. I’m not debating anything about chances of pregnancy here, just being technically accurate. ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2007, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/116 "2007-06-21T00:05:55Z")
[QUOTE=Manda JO] And this is where you are giving off an unintentional antagonistic vibe here. You experience isn’t enough of a basis to call other women liars. And I don’t think you mean that it is. But when you say That’s a “lie women tell”, it sounds like you are setting your self up as an authority on what women think/believe/experience because you happen to be one. And that raises people’s hackles. Surely you can see why? [/QUOTE] I’m KIDDING. Tell your hackles to relax. The whole “I have a headache” thing is a cliche worth spoofing on, don’t ya think? Or do you have a headache too? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2007, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/117 "2007-06-21T02:01:28Z")
> [@Rubystreak](#): > > There’s another lie women tell. Sex is good for a headache IME. I get headaches pretty often, and sex is better than Advil for making them go away… [QUOTE=Manda JO] And this is where you are giving off an unintentional antagonistic vibe here. You experience isn’t enough of a basis to call other women liars. And I don’t think you mean that it is. But when you say That’s a “lie women tell”, it sounds like you are setting your self up as an authority on what women think/believe/experience because you happen to be one. And that raises people’s hackles. Surely you can see why? [/QUOTE] I have to side with **Manda JO** on this one. What works for one person _is not_ going to work for another. Saying that the old “I have a headache” is just another lie that women tell is definitely antagonistic. I’ve heard that sex is good for making a headache go away, but when I have a full-blown migraine, I don’t want anyone to _touch me_, much less have sex with me. ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2007, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/118 "2007-06-21T02:04:16Z")
[QUOTE=BiblioCat] I have to side with **Manda JO** on this one. What works for one person _is not_ going to work for another. Saying that the old “I have a headache” is just another lie that women tell is definitely antagonistic. [/quote] Yeah, it would be if I was serious. Do you not believe that I was joking, or did you just not read that, or is everyone so defensive about my stance in this thread that it doesn’t matter what I say anymore, it’s antagonistic and you’re going to take it to task? > [@](#): > > I’ve heard that sex is good for making a headache go away, but when I have a full-blown migraine, I don’t want anyone to _touch me_, much less have sex with me. Honestly, did you sincerely, truly think I was saying, in a serious way, that sex cures migraines, and you just need to put out to make it better? Think about it… There you go. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2007, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/119 "2007-06-21T02:09:32Z")
> [@Rubystreak](#): > > Do you not believe that I was joking, or did you just not read that, or is everyone so defensive about my stance in this thread that it doesn’t matter what I say anymore, it’s antagonistic and you’re going to take it to task? Me, at this point I’m kind of leaning toward the position that you’re just bad at making jokes. I recommend more lavish use of smilies in order to flag your joke attempts for the unwary reader. ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2007, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604/120 "2007-06-21T02:12:58Z")
[QUOTE=Kimstu] Me, at this point I’m kind of leaning toward the position that you’re just bad at making jokes. I recommend more lavish use of smilies in order to flag your joke attempts for the unwary reader. [/QUOTE] You’re right, I’m terrible at making jokes. You know me so well (who are you again?)… or maybe the lack of sense of humor and willingness to read the absolute worst into whatever I say here is coming from elsewhere in the thread. YMMV. 😃😃😃 \<–smilies for your greater edification But at least you aren’t actually accusing me of being serious. I guess that’s better than previous posters. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-dont-men-understand-conception-why-do-women-lie-about-it/408604.md?page=7)