# Why hasn't Jennifer called?!? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 3, 2000, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454 "2000-03-03T03:22:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Jeannie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e480ec/32.png) [@Jeannie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeannie)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/21 "2000-03-04T03:48:00Z")
I got Harrison Ford as well. Um…I’ll give him up if someone can get me Harry Connick, Jr. ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/22 "2000-03-04T05:08:00Z")
Awwwww, quitcherbitchin! I got Danny Devito. ---
**Author:** ![thirdwarning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecccb3/32.png) [@thirdwarning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdwarning)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/23 "2000-03-04T05:34:00Z")
Jeannie, I got Harry Connick, Jr. Wanna trade? ---
**Author:** ![mega\_the\_roo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3da27b/32.png) [@mega\_the\_roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mega_the_roo)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/24 "2000-03-04T06:14:00Z")
ooh ooh, i’ll trade my harrison for a harry! * * * “If anybody wants a sheep, that is proof that he exists.” ---
**Author:** ![Jeannie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e480ec/32.png) [@Jeannie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeannie)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/25 "2000-03-04T16:29:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by thirdwarning: > **Jeannie, > I got Harry Connick, Jr. Wanna trade?** Sure! Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a crush on Harrison since I was a kid. But, I was always taught to share 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![xekul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/838e76/32.png) [@xekul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xekul)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/26 "2000-03-04T16:42:00Z")
Ick, I got Britney. The irony is that they call me a dirty old man but she’s older than I am… Say, anyone know if it’s possible to get Tori Amos? 🙂 * * * ``All of your dreams will come true. All of my dreams came true, but now… I have a bunch of other dreams.’’ – Sonic Youth. ---
**Author:** ![PurpleCrackwhore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc348/32.png) [@PurpleCrackwhore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PurpleCrackwhore)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/27 "2000-03-04T16:50:00Z")
Hmmmm Ricky Martin… I think I would much rather have Harrison Ford. Any one want to trade??? * * * I really try to be good but it just isn’t in my nature! ---
**Author:** ![mega\_the\_roo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3da27b/32.png) [@mega\_the\_roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mega_the_roo)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2000, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/28 "2000-03-05T06:24:00Z")
i have a question about this thing: how does it know when it’s a male or a female answering the questions? i mean, nowhere did it ask me for my sex and yet all the women are getting men, and the men women… how oh how? * * * “If anybody wants a sheep, that is proof that he exists.” ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/29 "2000-03-04T20:06:00Z")
I got Heidi Klum. She’ll do. I also found out that the sex god in me is Dionysus, God of Ecstacy. Cool. * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![Studi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Studi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Studi)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/30 "2000-03-04T20:12:00Z")
Fine, fine: I conceed. Selma Hayek. Studi * * * When I grow up, I want to be the Minister of Silly Walks. ---
**Author:** ![xekul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/838e76/32.png) [@xekul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xekul)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/31 "2000-03-04T21:57:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by mega the roo: > \*\*i have a question about this thing: > > how does it know when it’s a male or a female answering the questions? i mean, nowhere did it ask me for my sex and yet all the women are getting men, and the men women… how oh how? > > \*\* Actually, it does… you choose `Celebrity Matchmaker'' and I choose `Celebrity Matchmaker for Men’’… * * * ``All of your dreams will come true. All of my dreams came true, but now… I have a bunch of other dreams.’’ – Sonic Youth. ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/32 "2000-03-04T22:15:00Z")
I just know that Harrison would prefer me, as I have just found out that the sex goddess in me is DEMETER, Goddess of the fruitful Earth. I’m going to e-mail bluesman, and tell him how darn lucky he is. ---
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2000, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/33 "2000-03-04T23:12:00Z")
Eeeeeeeeeewwwwww!!! I demand a re-test! I got **Richard Simmons** … “We sense from your responses a desire to find someone who will make you feel like a free spirit, without a care in the world. Your choices reflect an appreciation for the outrageous and funny. We think that you should be sweating to the oldies with Richard Simmons! This peppy, big-haired Adonis knows just how to make you feel special. His intense enthusiasm coupled with his nylon short-shorts will make you squeal with glee. He is fit and firm and is guaranteed to make you burn. This fabulous fitness guru will stun you with his endurance, and with Richard, you are guaranteed to get a real workout!” Like I said above… Eeeeeeeeeewwwww!!! * * * “How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” - Anne Frank ---
**Author:** ![Rosebud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@Rosebud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rosebud)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2000, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/34 "2000-03-05T00:31:00Z")
I think something must be wrong with my connection… I was reading this thread and thought I saw the words “Richard Simmons” and “Adonis” in the same para-- aaggh! My eyes! * * * Gamera is really neat, he is full of turtle meat, we’ve been eating Gam-er-aaaa… ---
**Author:** ![Wage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7993a0/32.png) [@Wage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wage)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2000, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/35 "2000-03-05T01:28:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Studi: > Probably the same reason why this thread isn’t going to last very long. Hahaha! ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2000, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/36 "2000-03-05T02:33:00Z")
Neutron, I too got Ms. Stewart. I’m not too depressed though. Sure, she’s not as hot as the rest of the lasses and yeah, she did once pin a guy up against a wall with her car after getting into an argument with him, but she’s rich! Way rich! Multi-million dollar industry that’ll last way after Heidi and Jennifer’s breasts are sagging and Miss Spears has a C-section scar and dark rings under her eyes that sleep won’t get rid of. Besides, I bet she keeps a clean house. * * * “I guess one person can make a difference, although most of the time they probably shouldn’t.” ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2000, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/37 "2000-03-05T04:31:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by PurpleCrackwhore: > **Hmmmm Ricky Martin… I think I would much rather have Harrison Ford. Any one want to trade???** Not me. Not a chance. I’ve taken the test twice and gotten Harrison both times. Obviously he’s destined for me. I’ve also found out that I am HERA, Goddess of Devotion, that there’s a strong chance (51 out of 100) I’m really who I think I am and that my superpower is to be a chameleon. * * * Your Official Cat Goddess since 10/20/99. _SD chat:_ **\** Kat’s here! the board must be down! ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2000, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/38 "2000-03-05T10:11:00Z")
I got Howard Stern. Are they crazy? * * * If life were always like this…if they took your guns and left this stuff…we’d live a lot better. ---
**Author:** ![Wendell\_Wagner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8491ac/32.png) [@Wendell\_Wagner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wendell_Wagner)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2000, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/39 "2000-03-05T16:20:00Z")
I got: “Your best chance is to find some prostitute. And make sure it’s some drug-addicted one who’s HIV-positive, because that’s the only way she’d ever be desperate enough. No, forget it, no one is that desperate. Give it up.” Oh, excuse me, that’s my own assessment of my chances, not the test’s. The test says my perfect woman is Jennifer Anniston. Yeah, right. Get real. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2000, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454/40 "2000-03-05T17:37:00Z")
I can’t believe I took the test. I got Jennifer Aniston. Oh well, she’s taken. (Right, like if she wasn’t taken, I’d be calling her asking her out) * * * “Life is hard…but God is good” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-hasnt-jennifer-called/14454.md?page=3)