Why I hate JJ Abrams (nothing to do with lens flare)

[Intergalactic_Gladiator]

@Aji_de_Gallina

A smooth metal surface that spends energy balancing its head is a terrible locomotion system. It incredibly wasteful where simple tracks or wheels are so much better. It’s almost product placement. I still don’t know what it is supposed to do aside from having the smallest, yet conveniently shaped, drawer.
R2 is, conveniently never shown moving in places where its locomotion system would suck (it does some stupid hoping/waking thing). It also moves absurdly slowly. MY 94-year old gramma had a stroke 40 years ago and her left side is paralyzed and she moves more quickly with a cane.

My take on this is that an engineer somewhere in the Star Wars universe said “Wouldn’t it be cool if…” and then designed the BB series. People do that on Earth all the time. Low-rider pick up trucks look flashy but I wouldn’t want to haul anything in them or drive them over rough terrain.

[Aji_de_Gallina]

What was the point of the Nuremberg-rally thingy? Those things are usually for civilians, not for mind-controlled troop.

@Intergalactic_Gladiator

My take on this is that an engineer somewhere in the Star Wars universe said “Wouldn’t it be cool if…” and then designed the BB series. People do that on Earth all the time. Low-rider pick up trucks look flashy but I wouldn’t want to haul anything in them or drive them over rough terrain.

Yeah, but then it goes into the an x-wing as, I imagine, some sort of help.

[terentii]

@Aji_de_Gallina

What was the point of the Nuremberg-rally thingy? Those things are usually for civilians, not for mind-controlled troop.

Uhhhh … what?!? :dubious:

http://cache1.asset-cache.net/gc/548123281-germany-third-reich-nsdap-nuremberg-rally-gettyimages.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=X7WJLa88Cweo9HktRLaNXk3nKtAw%2B29ccU9K2NwZH8YmzPTHnyLyHdgfQ5nfnK%2FEuEMhs%2B%2ByxPMkJqXqvjhgVQ%3D%3D

[Doctor_Who]

@msmith537

Of course it’s “explained”. The world of Star Wars is basically a medieval one with knights and swords and whatnot (Vader stylized after a Japanese shogun, Kylo and his light-claymore more similar to a European knight). Boba Fett wears his for protection just like everyone else. And since he is a mercenary and not regular Imperial Army, his armor can be unique.

That’s kind of my problem with JJ Abrams Star Wars. He threw in a lot of stuff because it looked “cool”, but ultimately kind of doesn’t make a lot of sense.

Like the whole scavenging on Jakku thing. Wouldn’t a graveyard of downed star destroyers attract more than a tent city full of desert rats pulling the batteries out of the smoke detectors? After 30 years, I would expect to see a city full of salvage teams from half the quadrant breaking it apart for scrap and spare parts.

Sorry that’s just YOU explaining it. Please post a link to the clip from Empire or RoTJ or the Holiday Special that explains where Boba Fett got his armor. I’ll take my answer off the air.

[Miller]

@Doctor_Who

Sorry that’s just YOU explaining it. Please post a link to the clip from Empire or RoTJ or the Holiday Special that explains where Boba Fett got his armor. I’ll take my answer off the air.

The show where he got the armor from in Attack of the Clones, but I’m not sure I understand your complaint. Boba Fett wears armor because he’s frequently in situations where people are trying to violently kill him. His armor looks different from all the other armored bad guys, because he’s a bounty hunter, not an Imperial agent. What part of this is confusing you?

[Doctor_Who]

@Miller

The show where he got the armor from in Attack of the Clones, but I’m not sure I understand your complaint. Boba Fett wears armor because he’s frequently in situations where people are trying to violently kill him. His armor looks different from all the other armored bad guys, because he’s a bounty hunter, not an Imperial agent. What part of this is confusing you?

None of it. I’ll reiterate my point: Boba Fett shows up in his badass armor with no explanation of why he looks the way he does, says a few lines, and becomes a smash fan favorite. THAT is the explanation for why Captain Phasma shows up in her badass armor with no explanation of why she looks the way she does, says a few lines, and (hopefully) becomes a fan favorite. It’s just one more callback to the original trilogy that was brought in to the Force Awakens.

That was my point, not “why does Boba Fett wear armor?” which seems to be the question you guys think I want answered.

[Harvey_The_Heavy]

@msmith537

Why does Captain Phasma the only stormtrooper in silver armor? All the other officers don’t wear armor. And captain isn’t such a high military rank that we wouldn’t see dozens of similarly clad stormtroopers in the larger formations.

Didn’t the Empire use the naval rank structure? That would make a Captain the equivalent of an army Colonel, pretty high up.

But yeah, limited edition collectable toy action figures.

@RickJay

The very existence of a sequel requires a galactic conflict. The conflict as described so far - one in which it appears the Galaxy really has no clear governing authority at all, but is an ongoing struggle between the old Empire reborn as the First Order and the old Republic cobbled back together (I believe the Resistance is the continuation of the Rebels fighting in First Order territory) is consistent with the end of Return of the Jedi. It’s hardly original but it is perfectly consistent with the end of Episode VI.

I imagine after ROTJ, the remnants of the Empire would devolve into many factions fighting amongst themselves for control, like a Mob war. It would take some time for any one of them to consolidate power to the extent the First Order did. We’ll probably see all that in the midquels in about 2035 or so.

[GuanoLad]

@msmith537

Why does Captain Phasma the only stormtrooper in silver armor?

Personally, I think she’s a droid.

[Bryan_Ekers]

@Aji_de_Gallina

Super hot women living in a shitty places are regularly molested, it’s the norm. There is no societal structure that could help her, no cops, mayor, family, no bonds between them. Ask any woman how many days can they live there without getting raped.

Well, while she may be varying degrees of hot to us, the audience, she’s living on a planet that may not have a significant human population, i.e. the beings around her don’t find her attractive since she’s of a different species than they.

Plus she seems capable of defending herself, even without a blaster.

[Pushkin]

@Jonathan_Chance

Disney - again rightly, in my opinion - have confidence that their production and writing people can do a better job of universe and story building than the hodgepodge that happened in the past. The movies will be the better for it

I had absolute faith that they could too, it seemed that Star Wars would be in really good hands under the Disney umbrella.

But there was precious little world building going on, nothing unique about TFA as an entry in Star Wars canon. Maybe their faith in themselves wobbled a little bit, although I doubt it was worry about nerd rage.

@Penfeather

Ah yes, I remember when the Disney vans rumbled down the street, stopping for faceless masked goons to kick down doors and pile up N64 Shadow of the Empire cartridges and dogeared copies of Han Solo At Star’s End as the flames mounted higher. It was the nerd Kristallnacht.

Although the great purge did take away from the victories I’d scored flying for the Rebellion and then the Empire in X-Wing and TIE Fighter, so I guess I can summon some nerd rage against Disney for that one.

[Aji_de_Gallina]

@Bryan_Ekers

Well, while she may be varying degrees of hot to us, the audience, she’s living on a planet that may not have a significant human population, i.e. the beings around her don’t find her attractive since she’s of a different species than they.

Plus she seems capable of defending herself, even without a blaster.

I’ll recant on the hot and simply specify that she has a vagina. There are enough humans in Jakku (according to Wookiepedia and other wikis).

She’s good at defending herself due to Plot Armor +3. She’s skinny and has a stick nest to faster-than-light stuff.

[Dale_Sams]

@Smapti

I dunno. How does a farm boy whose piloting/gunning experience consists of bulls-eyeing womp rats in his T-16 manage to fly an X-Wing with no training and blow up a planet-sized battle station with one shot?

He may have been a sanitation worker, but he was also a stormtrooper trained for combat duty, and as we see in his duel with the stormtrooper armed with a riot baton on Takodana, stormtroopers are trained in melee combat. While he may not have been familiar with the lightsaber as a weapon, he knew enough about the basics of melee combat to briefly hold his own against a gravely injured and irrationally angry man who had never really completed his lightsaber training in the first place.

Exactly. Having neat unseen Force tricks doesn’t make Ren a Windu-level lightsaber wielder. Hell he wields the thing like a broad-sword. That alone should show he’s got some learnin to do. He’s been hit with a Crossbow blast, which the movie has PAINFULLY shown to be powerful as hell,…and Abrams has stated killing *** made Ren weaker not more resolved.*

*Now…the issue of ‘losing your connection’ is something else entirely, and not one i’m particularly happy with.

[Dale_Sams]

Oh…and this has gone astray from the OP somewhat so I’ll chime in…I don’t hate him, but anyone had to see he was just cannibalizing the Star Trek universe for parts and fanboy writing it into a corner. Yes the 2009 flick was entertaining.

Give me 150 million and i’ll give you an X-Files movie unlike one you’ve ever seen! I’ll cannibalize it, blast it with homages, give The Lone Gunmen cameos…cast famous actors as young versions of Deep Throat and X…etc…etc…and it’ll make a kabillion bucks!

[Sam_Stone]

@Lobohan

I has grapnels, I’m sure can make it up stairs.

…because what you really want in your domestic robot is a design that forces it to shoot grapnels into your walls every time you tell it to bring you a damned beer.

I liked the movie well enough, because Abrams got the tone and feel right, and that’s what was missing from the second trilogy.

But I have to say, Starkiller base is perhaps the dumbest weapon ever made. It’s a single-shot device, since it eats its own star to fire. So way to go, First Order. Your multi-gajillion dollar super base is now a drifting frozen planet, doomed to drift through the black for thousands of years before it gets close enough to another star to make another shot.

[Lobohan]

@Sam_Stone

…because what you really want in your domestic robot is a design that forces it to shoot grapnels into your walls every time you tell it to bring you a damned beer.

The same thing could be said about R2. At least until Lucas decided he could fly. Also, we haven’t seen him go up stairs. Maybe he can do it with an arm propping him up. Also, he’s a repair/piloting droid. Most hangars are flat.

I liked the movie well enough, because Abrams got the tone and feel right, and that’s what was missing from the second trilogy.

But I have to say, Starkiller base is perhaps the dumbest weapon ever made. It’s a single-shot device, since it eats its own star to fire. So way to go, First Order. Your multi-gajillion dollar super base is now a drifting frozen planet, doomed to drift through the black for thousands of years before it gets close enough to another star to make another shot.

According to Wookiepedia it can hyperjump.

[MrDibble]

@Sam_Stone

But I have to say, Starkiller base is perhaps the dumbest weapon ever made. It’s a single-shot device

So the entire second half of the movie, when they were trying to prevent its second shot at D’Qar, was all just a snipe hunt…

[terentii]

@Sam_Stone

But I have to say, Starkiller base is perhaps the dumbest weapon ever made. It’s a single-shot device, since it eats its own star to fire. So way to go, First Order. Your multi-gajillion dollar super base is now a drifting frozen planet, doomed to drift through the black for thousands of years before it gets close enough to another star to make another shot.

Sort of like this guy… :rolleyes:

[Voyager]

@Grumman

I do not agree that it succeeded at that. The implications of the end of Return of the Jedi were that the Rebel Alliance was victorious and the Empire was defeated, and that Luke Skywalker had his head screwed on straight with regard to the Dark Side. Episode 7 should not have been about the New Republic being treated like it was still the Rebel Alliance, the Imperial Remnant still being treated like it can secretly build even bigger and more destructive planet killers than the Death Star, and about Han, Luke and Leia failing utterly at raising a child to not be a serial killer.

And I don’t believe in World War II, because the Allies beat the Evil Empire, so why should it be back 25 (not 30) years later?

But they could have had a bit more backstory.

[Voyager]

@msmith537

I have to say that casting Adam Driver as a petulant douche wannabee Vader works a lot better than trying to top one of the most iconic villains in movie history.

Yeah, everyone complains about TFA being the same as ANH, and then complains about this major difference. I can see Luke saying “I knew Darth Vader, and you’re no Darth Vader” to him.

As for Finn standing up to him, even wounded, I’m betting that Finn has some Force in him. That would explain why he is the only Stormtrooper in history to be able to resist the indoctrination. You don’t have to be related to Anakin to have the Force after all.

I could have done without Death Star III, but all in all it beat the hell out of the Star Trek reboot.

[Voyager]

@Sam_Lowry

Same thing with the Star Trek movies. After the poor box office performances of the last few Star Trek movies, there was no way that new ones were going to be made unless they were a sure thing. And the way to do that was to make them big action movies. Abrams brought his specific style (and lens flare) to them, but the fact that they exist and that they are somewhat Star Trek in name only is because of the studio, not Abrams.

Yeah, but there was plenty of room for him to have done a movie even with a young Kirk without shitting on everything that made Star Trek great. I don’t mind the big explosions - that is kind of required. I do mind him screwing with Kirk and Spock.

Kirk pushed the limits, but he also was successful within Star Fleet. He would never have made Captain otherwise. When the real Kirk beat the simulation, I bet he acted surprised, which led his teachers to have had to figure out what was going on. The fake Kirk thumbed his nose at everything. I also bet that the real Kirk beat it the first time.
As for Spock, the thing that made the character great was his split between logic and emotion. Having Spock throw his entire culture away is absurd, and destroys a lot of what made ST more than just an action show.

I’m steeling myself to see the second one some time, but I think I’m going to need a barf bag at the ready.