# Why in nee hell don't water fountains work correctly? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 5, 2001, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776 "2001-03-05T02:39:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/1 "2001-03-05T02:39:05Z")
Ok I didn’t pay much attention to this problem the first 30 years of my life but now I am getting sick of it. Got a drink tonight at an ice cream place here in town. Walked over to the water fountain, leaned over, pressed the button and got hit right between the friggin eyes with stream of water. _Shit_ I stepped back and hit the button again. The water arc’d right over the fountain edge and out into the floor and splattering my shoes. :mad: The water fountain at work puts out a stream so fucking low that you might as well lap the water out of a freaking bowl. Is this a global joke being pulled by water fountain installers around the world? If so I just don’t get it. I would just once like to punch the button on one and see a middle of the road stream come up outa there. So I ask you, what the hell is up with water fountains and the people who install them? I mean have we not been to the moon? Do we not have technology that will take us to the other planets? So why can’t we get a NORMAL STREAM of water coming out of the water fountains? Huh? Well?? _note_ If you don’t know the answer to this gut wrenching problem don’t worry about it, I just haven’t posted in a while and I thought I would do so. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/2 "2001-03-05T02:46:06Z")
I have to ask: What is “nee” Hell? Is “nee” a place, a religion, or a state of mind? Does it have anything to do with Monty Python’s Holy Grail? The Teeming Minions need to know! ---
**Author:** ![waterj2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/858c86/32.png) [@waterj2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/waterj2)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/3 "2001-03-05T03:28:33Z")
> [@](#): > > Main Entry: née > Variant(s): or nee /'nA/ > Function: adjective > Etymology: French née, feminine of né, literally, born, past participle of naître to be born, from Latin nasci – more at NATION > Date: 1758 > 1 – used to identify a woman by her maiden family name > 2 : originally or formerly called \ Apparently, it’s not called “hell” anymore, according to **aha**. ---
**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/4 "2001-03-05T03:30:52Z")
> [@](#): > > Is “nee” a place, a religion, or a state of mind? Nee is nirvana baby. It exists in the state of Oklahoma where the men are men and the sheep are nervous. All water fountains there work as they are supposed to. And you get laid everyday. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/5 "2001-03-05T03:32:59Z")
With that many sheep available, I would _hope_ so! ---
**Author:** ![Silo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Silo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silo)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/6 "2001-03-05T03:38:47Z")
Hey! like welcome back!! ya fucker!! 😉 A-hmmm… about these water fountains: Must be that “water fountain maintainence” is pretty low on most people’s budgets. Generally speaking I think they are just one of those things that fall under the - if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it catagory. Maybe it’s time to become a _bottled water_ man. ---
**Author:** ![MysterEcks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f475e1/32.png) [@MysterEcks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysterEcks)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/7 "2001-03-05T05:25:10Z")
Me ‘n’ yer mamma tried, aha, we really did. “There’s a differ’nce 'tween water fountains and bidets,” we kep’ sayin’, but would you listen? Nosirree. ---
**Author:** ![Eo\_Echo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ebca7d/32.png) [@Eo\_Echo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eo_Echo)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/8 "2001-03-05T06:42:57Z")
From what I understand, water pressure variance is usually the culprit for such things. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/9 "2001-03-05T19:00:51Z")
There is a water fountain at the park down the road from my house, it is broken, but you see a tap near the softball fields and you find it has a lock on it. A few feet away, you find another water pump, but this faucet also has a lock on it. Finally you see the last tap you look down and this one too is locked. You curse the loser who decided to lock the water, and you curse the one-horse town where this park is. Apparently you can only get the water if you play softball. Every time i go to the park the water pumps are always locked. and then i wonder why i do not go to the park much… ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2001, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/10 "2001-03-05T23:16:46Z")
anya marie On visits to this park, don’t forget the pipe wrench for removing the head, or an adjustable wrench for removing the top that accesses the valve gasket. aha I believe if the manufacture can put a compressor in the unit to cool the water, they sould have built in pressure regulaters. The cooler at work is hooked into a well. Sometimes you need an aquarium air line to stick into the hole and suck the water. Other times the water shoots over the side and runs down the wall to the electical outlet. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2001, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/11 "2001-03-06T03:10:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Silo \* > **Hey! like welcome back!!** Were you gone? ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Call\_Me\_Tech-Mex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@Just\_Call\_Me\_Tech-Mex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Call_Me_Tech-Mex)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2001, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/12 "2001-03-06T03:19:20Z")
I’ve had the same complaint. Only the ones I see won’t drain. They put a brand new one in at the local park’s baseball field. It got clogged up the very first day, when guys rinsed their muddy bats off with it. Couldn’t anyone see this coming? Was this the first fountain ever installed? Don’t they have some guidelines by now about what won’t work in a park!! ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2001, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-in-nee-hell-dont-water-fountains-work-correctly/56776/13 "2001-03-07T00:05:10Z")
Phobia: or a hacksaw to cut off the lock with, but then i’d have to go buy 1 new hacksaw …but i think i can dig up a wrench or two. [sub]we are not the Goodwrench family, alas.[/sub] Haven Hollow Park: Fuck you! Bring your own goddamn water! Water only for the softball players, limp dick!