# Why is a dating preference for Asian women so readily disparaged? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 8, 2013, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506 "2013-06-08T21:52:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![simple\_homer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@simple\_homer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simple_homer)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/161 "2013-06-14T16:49:39Z")
> [@Mijin](#): > > ETA: This post is responding to **fjs1fs** and **simpler homer** > > I don’t know why you guys are trying to hard to fight over this point, but it doesn’t work. You can’t claim “well obviously, bodyweight is the most important factor so we can say asian women are more attractive”. > You’ll never get agreement on what is the most important factor, and even if you did, you don’t know if all the other factors combined might actually mean asian women are less attractive on average. > > Furthermore, it could be the case that obesity is very unattractive but below that there may be little or no correlation between weight and attractiveness. > > As I mentioned before, I’m living in China, in an area where 9,999 out of every 10,000 people I see is Han Chinese, and at the moment Chinese women leave me cold. > The only ones I come close to feeling any attraction for are the ones with a slightly chunkier, Western-style physique. > I’m sure my preferences will shift eventually but nevertheless, it’s very odd for me to hear people attempt to prove that thinner is objectively better so asian women are more attractive. I have traveled to many countries around the world, and attractive black, white, yellow and brown people are to be found all around the world. To try to say that a country does not have many attractive people seems very racist to me. Beauty is beauty, and to not be able to see that beauty seems to be very sad, and racist, to me. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/162 "2013-06-14T17:03:53Z")
> [@simple\_homer](#): > > To try to say that a country does not have many attractive people seems very racist to me. It’s a good thing I didn’t say that. ---
**Author:** ![fjs1fs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9e8a1a/32.png) [@fjs1fs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fjs1fs)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/163 "2013-06-14T17:43:07Z")
> [@Mijin](#): > > ETA: This post is responding to **fjs1fs** and **simpler homer** > > I don’t know why you guys are trying to hard to fight over this point, but it doesn’t work. You can’t claim “well obviously, bodyweight is the most important factor so we can say asian women are more attractive”. > You’ll never get agreement on what is the most important factor, and even if you did, you don’t know if all the other factors combined might actually mean asian women are less attractive on average. > > Furthermore, it could be the case that obesity is very unattractive but below that there may be little or no correlation between weight and attractiveness. > > As I mentioned before, I’m living in China, in an area where 9,999 out of every 10,000 people I see is Han Chinese, and at the moment Chinese women leave me cold. > The only ones I come close to feeling any attraction for are the ones with a slightly chunkier, Western-style physique. > I’m sure my preferences will shift eventually but nevertheless, it’s very odd for me to hear people attempt to prove that thinner is objectively better so asian women are more attractive. If you’re going to put quotes around a point I have supposedly made, please quote an actual quote of mine. when the hell did I say “bodyweight is the most important factor?” Please re-read all of my points. What I said about body weight is that it’s one measure that MOST of the POPULATION agrees on–that THIN and FIT are more attractive than OBESE or even OVERWEIGHT. That’s why exercise classes, gyms, weight loss products, drugs, and diets have Mega-Millions of annual revenues and weight gain products are quite sparse by comparison. This is Point #1. Point #2 is that Asian women tend to be fitter and slimmer than Caucasian American women. Point #3 is that except for body weight, just about ALL other traits are Subjective. These include hair color/length, eye color, skin tone, height. Conclusion (just math): Using the statistics (i.e. point #2) re: the MOST OBJECTIVE trait (i.e. body fitness/weight), it follows that as perceived by the average person (not necessarily ME and not necessarily YOU), on average more Asians will be considered “Attractive.” ---
**Author:** ![fjs1fs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9e8a1a/32.png) [@fjs1fs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fjs1fs)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/164 "2013-06-14T17:53:43Z")
> [@pancakes3](#): > > A. I’m just objecting to the idea that Asian women are wholesale better looking than White women because they’re thin. > > B. Thinner may be better, unless you want a Karashian-esque buttock on your lady or a Christina-Hendrix-esque bust, or a Sophia Vergara-esque everything. > > C. Asian women are shorter. Shorter women don’t have very good looking legs. > > D. For many east Asian women being pale is a mark of beauty and they take great lengths to keep their skin white. It’s a cultural thing. I don’t know why you’re being so incredulous. > > I just find the defense of “oh come on… skinnier is better and asian women are skinnier!” to be a strange reconciliation of racial preference in attraction. Nobody is forcing you to date an obese woman if you choose a white woman just the same as nobody is forcing you to date a pale, moon-faced asian midget if you choose Asian. There is beauty in both races, and others. > > To take a stand and say “Asians are better because they’re thinner” suggests that you’re playing the odds somehow and preferring one race of woman over another because of a generalization rather than taking attraction on a case-by-case basis which to me seems entirely bizarre. Please see my response to Mijin re: Asians being “wholesale better looking.” I am in no way saying that. If I had to rank the 100 most beautiful women I have ever seen, probably 60-70 of them would be caucasian. But given the statistics on obesity and overweightedness in the non-Asian female population, the percentage of TOTAL WHITE WOMEN I find attractive (and I AM NOT ALONE) is driven down way below that of the Asian population. Re your examples - you gave three women with AMAZING bodies. I actually prefer women with curves (but if you think CURVES = OBESITY/OVERWEIGHT, then you no Zero about the female body). Do you think when people discuss America’s obesity problem that they’re talking about The Kardashians–if so, you are out of your mind. Re: the good looking legs–I again am amazed at this stereotype I’ve never heard: i.e., Asians have ugly legs! WTF!!! Tan vs non-Tan. I’m only “incredulous” that you believe that Asians (multi billions of people) don’t have tans. My Chinese girlfriend always wears spf 50 or a sun hat because she’s TOO TAN! She bronzes right through the SPF. I sure wish my IRISH SKIN was like hers. So again, WTF! Re: your last point, I will reiterate that I have never dated based on race preference, and I’ll add that in my lifetime, 80% of the women I’ve been with have been white, including my 5-2 105 lb. ex-wife of 11 years. I’m just pointing out statistics, and with the growing obesity of the white American population, my preference has moved more toward Asians, who tend to be thinner and FITTER. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/165 "2013-06-14T18:03:40Z")
> [@fjs1fs](#): > > If you’re going to put quotes around a point I have supposedly made, please quote an actual quote of mine. when the hell did I say “bodyweight is the most important factor?” My apologies. It was a paraphrase, not an attempt to put words in anyone’s mouth. I don’t think it’s an inaccurate paraphrase though. > [@](#): > > Please re-read all of my points. What I said about body weight is that it’s one measure that MOST of the POPULATION agrees on–that THIN and FIT are more attractive than OBESE or even OVERWEIGHT. That’s why exercise classes, gyms, weight loss products, drugs, and diets have Mega-Millions of annual revenues and weight gain products are quite sparse by comparison. This is Point #1. Already I’ve diverged from you here. It’s true that many people believe that they would be more attractive if they lost weight. It doesn’t necessarily follow that they would be. It’s like drawing a conclusion about whether people have well-reasoned opinions based on whether they themselves believe they do. We’ve had countless threads where people have said they don’t find size 0 models attractive _and don’t know anyone who does_. So the beauty ideal and what people actually like may be pretty far separated. And note that for exercise, trying to become skinnier is not the only purpose. Many do it to tone up, bodybuild, or improve strength, fitness etc. Finally, even if it’s true that slim is universally more attractive than overweight, we’d still need to compare underweight to overweight to see if a shifted average is overall more attractive. > [@](#): > > Point #3 is that except for body weight, just about ALL other traits are Subjective. These include hair color/length, eye color, skin tone, height. Well all traits are subjective, but I don’t think many are arbitrary. ---
**Author:** ![fjs1fs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9e8a1a/32.png) [@fjs1fs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fjs1fs)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/166 "2013-06-14T18:03:57Z")
outside the edit window: oops, I spelled “Know” incorrectly, as “No.” ---
**Author:** ![fjs1fs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9e8a1a/32.png) [@fjs1fs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fjs1fs)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/167 "2013-06-14T18:10:13Z")
> [@Mijin](#): > > My apologies. It was a paraphrase, not an attempt to put words in anyone’s mouth. > > Already I’ve diverged from you here. > > It’s true that many people believe that they would be more attractive if they lost weight. It doesn’t necessarily follow that they would be. It’s like drawing a conclusion about whether people have well-reasoned opinions based on whether they themselves believe they do. > Also note that for exercise, trying to become skinnier is not the only purpose. Many do it to tone up, bodybuild, or improve strength, fitness etc. > > Finally, even if it’s true that slim is universally more attractive than overweight, we’d still need to compare underweight to overweight to see if a shifted average is overall more attractive. > > Well all traits are subjective, but I don’t think many are arbitrary. I’ve never once said the word SKINNY, but you keep saying it. I say thinner and FIT in every discussion. I don’t like skinny. You REALLY don’t think that this fat population of ours would look better if people lost the weight they were trying to lose? Re: your underweight point, I agree. But if we limit this discussion to Americans (which may be unfair–I’m not even sure of your location), underweightedness is clearly a MUCH SMALLER ISSUE than overweightedness. Quick cite (2% of population underweight) [http://www.cnn.com/2012/06/22/health/diet-fitness/trying-to-gain-weight](http://www.cnn.com/2012/06/22/health/diet-fitness/trying-to-gain-weight) Quick cite (69% of population overweight) [http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/overwt.htm](http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/overwt.htm) Wow, the discrepancy is worse than I would have guessed! ---
**Author:** ![fjs1fs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9e8a1a/32.png) [@fjs1fs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fjs1fs)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/168 "2013-06-14T18:12:59Z")
My apologies, Mijin. I now see that you’re in Shanghai, so it’s quite possible that you are unfamiliar with the obesity issue in America (perhaps those links I gave will help familiarize you). I"m quite unfamiliar with Shanghai, so I cannot comment at all on the state of affairs there. ---
**Author:** ![fjs1fs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9e8a1a/32.png) [@fjs1fs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fjs1fs)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/169 "2013-06-14T18:16:17Z")
Despite my admission about my lack of knowledge of Shanghai, I am going to assume that the population tends to be much thinner than the US population. That being the case, your definition of “chunky” may really be the curves that I (and I think most men) find attractive on women. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/170 "2013-06-14T18:26:42Z")
> [@fjs1fs](#): > > I’ve never once said the word SKINNY, but you keep saying it. I say thinner and FIT in every discussion. I don’t like skinny. Well that’s just it. It’s trivial to find data that East Asian women are on average _slimmer_ than Caucasian women, but _fitter_ is a less precise term. If we compare a woman who is quite slim, to a woman who has both more muscle and more fat, which woman is fitter? > [@](#): > > My apologies, Mijin. I now see that you’re in Shanghai, so it’s quite possible that you are unfamiliar with the obesity issue in America (perhaps those links I gave will help familiarize you). No need to apologize. I am quite familiar with the issue of obesity in America of course, but was just considering the claim that (East) Asian women were more attractive than Caucasian women. Indeed, did anyone limit the discussion to the US? If so, I think that’s a little unfair as one group is being limited to a particular nation (with bad eating habits), but the other is not. All this is playing devil’s advocate anyway. There simply is no fact of which group is more attractive. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/171 "2013-06-14T18:43:58Z")
> [@fjs1fs](#): > > That being the case, your definition of “chunky” may really be the curves that I (and I think most men) find attractive on women. Well, whatever it is, it is something that is less common among the Chinese population I have seen so far than it was in Europe. And I actually think it’s muscle mass. We don’t normally think of muscle as being something that makes women more attractive but I think it’s what’s necessary to give the right _kind_ of curves. Disclaimer: I do not objectify women or condone anyone else doing the same. Personality and compatibility is important for me in dating, I’m just limiting myself to talking about non-facial physical features for the context of this discussion. ---
**Author:** ![pancakes3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ba9def/32.png) [@pancakes3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pancakes3)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/172 "2013-06-14T19:00:06Z")
I’m not here to directly butt heads with anyone. I’m just pointing out inconsistencies in the arguments (imo). The OP asks why there’s backlash over having a racial preference. _somebody_ brought up that asians as a whole are less obese. I (amongst others) said that be that as it may, it’s a silly reason because you’re choosing Asians over Caucasians wholesale based on generalities rather than individuals _somebody_ said that body weight is overwhelmingly the major deciding factor for determining beauty I said that if you’re going to judge based on generalities, Asian women are shorter, have founder faces, and not as buxom as a whole compared to other races. Doesn’t that sound silly though? To make generalizations to exclude Asians from consideration? That’s all. I’m not saying Kim Kardashian is representative of the obese, Chinese people don’t tan, or whatever nitpicky semantic misunderstanding there is gumming up the general debate germaine to the OP. ---
**Author:** ![BrianJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/54ee81/32.png) [@BrianJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrianJ)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/173 "2013-06-14T22:57:00Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > Does that count for posters who are in interracial relationships? How about for posters who have had long term relationships with people of Asian descent? I’m haing difficulty seeing what your question has to do with my post. Clarification please? ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/174 "2013-06-14T23:13:12Z")
> [@pancakes3](#): > > _somebody_ brought up that asians as a whole are less obese. While I realize that Asian often means East Asian, let’s not forget their West Asian brethren, who are often chunkier and tend to seek out the same. We get a lot of Arab, Iranian etc tourists, and the Grace Hotel and the sidewalks around it are chock-a-block with some of the meatier streetwalkers, because that’s what the men are looking for. I spent one evening in the Grace Hotel coffee shop and had no idea before then that there were that many heavy Thai ladies! ---
**Author:** ![Doggo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/87869e/32.png) [@Doggo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doggo)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2013, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/175 "2013-06-16T05:51:04Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > You can’t draw any conclusions from that. Obesity is one arguably “universal” beauty-nullifier, but there are clearly others. Maybe Asian women are more likely to have poor dentition, disfigurement, and so on. Good grief! Have you ever been to East Asia? ---
**Author:** ![Doggo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/87869e/32.png) [@Doggo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doggo)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2013, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/176 "2013-06-16T05:52:48Z")
> [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](#): > > You think this is about the difference between many and most? The mind boggles. > > Let’s try it again but read slower this time. Looks are subjective. What you find drop dead gorgeous can be just okay or even ick to other people. Whippity doo that hundreds of thousands of western men think it’s true. Hundreds of thousands of western men probably also don’t agree. Maybe millions of men think Swedish women are the hottest around while millions more may be unimpressed. > > To pretend that you can factually say that a group of people are hotter than another group of people (especially as wide a group as “Asian women”) is nutso crazypants or hopelessly daft. Facts when it comes to attractive? Hell you could take the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit edition and show it to a hundred thousand men and each model will have numerous guys thinking she’s the hottest thing ever while simultaneously having numerous guys think she’s a dog. That’s what’s so awesome about different tastes. > > Now, this little side conversation has gone on long enough for me. If you want to continue to act like you can say these things as if they are fact rather than just your opinion then I say bless your heart and don’t let things like logic stop you. Be you! So you come on an anonymous forum, and get offended by other anonymous posters opinions, sigh. ---
**Author:** ![Doggo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/87869e/32.png) [@Doggo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doggo)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2013, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/177 "2013-06-16T05:55:11Z")
> [@Koxinga](#): > > Ah, so, who knows what issues afflict these mysterious dragon ladies of the East? > > [Koxinga goes outside his door to check, returns] > > Ahem. It’s hot pants. I can report that these poor benighted young women of the Orient are afflicted by an unseemly preponderance of hot pants in the hot sticky summer months. Now if you’ll excuse me . . . And, if not wearing the shortest of short shorts, they are wearing micro miniskirts… ---
**Author:** ![squeegee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/squeegee/32/14537_2.png) [@squeegee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squeegee)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2013, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/178 "2013-06-16T05:57:26Z")
> [@Doggo](#): > > So you come on an anonymous forum, and get offended by other anonymous posters opinions, sigh. And yet you get offended by his offense? “sigh” ---
**Author:** ![Doggo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/87869e/32.png) [@Doggo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doggo)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2013, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/179 "2013-06-16T06:00:37Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > While I realize that Asian often means East Asian, let’s not forget their West Asian brethren, who are often chunkier and tend to seek out the same. We get a lot of Arab, Iranian etc tourists, and the Grace Hotel and the sidewalks around it are chock-a-block with some of the meatier streetwalkers, because that’s what the men are looking for. I spent one evening in the Grace Hotel coffee shop and had no idea before then that there were that many heavy Thai ladies! Ah, the Grace Hotel! Do you know the saying " the Grace is the Place" nudge nudge. Surely you haven’t been in LOS that long if you weren’t aware that Thai women are becoming heavier. Something to do with western diet, I’m sure. They even have a Miss Jumbo pageant for the real large ladies. However, you are way less likely to see women waddling down the street in Thailand than in any western country ( unless they are tourists ). ---
**Author:** ![Doggo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/87869e/32.png) [@Doggo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doggo)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2013, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506/180 "2013-06-16T06:03:43Z")
> [@squeegee](#): > > And yet you get offended by his offense? “sigh” Why do you say I’m offended? I am just astonished that anyone on an anonymous forum would get offended about other people’s opinions. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-a-dating-preference-for-asian-women-so-readily-disparaged/660506.md?page=10)