# why is it.... \[people telling others when they are not feeling well\] **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 13, 2019, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474 "2019-06-13T15:31:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Dana\_Scully](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5daacb/32.png) [@Dana\_Scully](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dana_Scully)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2019, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/1 "2019-06-13T15:31:11Z")
Why do some people think it’s their bounden duty to tell the world they’re not feeling well? (the person in question is not ill, just a little under the weather). It’s really irritating but taking this person to task would cause more problems than it would solve; I just have to live with it. Someone should remind this person of what Winston Churchill said (or at least, it’s attributed to him): “Most of the work of the world is done by people who aren’t feeling well.” And she isn’t even working–she’s retired. I wake up feeling funky often (chronic illness; nothing can be done) but I don’t think I’m obliged to stand in a doorway and inform the world. Sheesh! ---
**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2019, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/2 "2019-06-13T15:37:41Z")
For some people, illness, tragedy and disaster is their Life’s entertainment. And it is always the worst, the biggest, the most devastating, too. Try putting a vacuous expression on your face as you look over the person’s shoulder and saying, “That’s nice, dear. What do you think about the riots in Hong Kong?” ~VOW ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2019, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/3 "2019-06-14T16:42:26Z")
> [@Dana\_Scully](#): > > Why do some people think it’s their bounden duty to tell the world they’re not feeling well? (the person in question is not ill, just a little under the weather). It’s really irritating but taking this person to task would cause more problems than it would solve; I just have to live with it. > > Someone should remind this person of what Winston Churchill said (or at least, it’s attributed to him): “Most of the work of the world is done by people who aren’t feeling well.” And she isn’t even working–she’s retired. I wake up feeling funky often (chronic illness; nothing can be done) but I don’t think I’m obliged to stand in a doorway and inform the world. Sheesh! I would suggest recreational one-upmanship. “My back is just so sore this morning. And my nose is itching so terr…” “I have pancreatic cancer. I have 3 months to live.” Alas, it probably wouldn’t work. “Sure, OK, but my nose!” ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2019, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/4 "2019-06-14T16:53:02Z")
When anyone asks me how I’m doing, I usually answer, “better than can be expected”. Just because. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2019, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/5 "2019-06-14T16:56:41Z")
> [@gnoitall](#): > > I would suggest recreational one-upmanship. > > “My back is just so sore this morning. And my nose is itching so terr…” > > “I have pancreatic cancer. I have 3 months to live.” Lucky you!! At least it’ll be over soon. But ohhh… my bursitis… ---
**Author:** ![scr4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2019, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/6 "2019-06-14T18:09:07Z")
When I do that, it’s usually to try to explain why I’m in a foul mood, to make sure they don’t think I’m annoyed with them. ---
**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2019, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/7 "2019-06-14T19:21:08Z")
**Moderator Note** I edited the thread title to more clearly indicate the topic. Please use more descriptive thread titles. ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2019, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/8 "2019-06-14T19:23:18Z")
well some times when someone asks how are you to me I reply " well i ain’t dead yet and in this world that’s about as good as can be expected " and then move along as they try to parse that statement with a look on their face, ---
**Author:** ![Dana\_Scully](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5daacb/32.png) [@Dana\_Scully](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dana_Scully)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2019, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/9 "2019-06-16T04:04:14Z")
> [@VOW](#): > > For some people, illness, tragedy and disaster is their Life’s entertainment. And it is always the worst, the biggest, the most devastating, too. > > Try putting a vacuous expression on your face as you look over the person’s shoulder and saying, “That’s nice, dear. What do you think about the riots in Hong Kong?” > ~VOW putting on a vacuous expression on my face?? It’s already there. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2019, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/10 "2019-06-16T04:39:17Z")
Vacuer? Vacuier? Completely blank expression, mouth open, a line of drool hanging off your lip? ~VOW ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2019, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/11 "2019-06-16T06:03:00Z")
I’m always surprised at the Lil’wrekkers friends who answer my query of “how are you doing?” These are late teens and 20yo., I get descriptions worse than my ol’ Grannys worst day. If they only knew. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2019, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/12 "2019-06-16T07:31:11Z")
Maybe people just want a little sympathy. ---
**Author:** ![Tzigone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@Tzigone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzigone)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2019, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/13 "2019-06-16T11:11:36Z")
Or they are just chit-chatting about their day, and feeling poorly has a big effect on their day. If people constantly bemoan their illnesses, yes, that’s annoying. If they actually answer “how’re you doing” or mention just feeling ugghy during general conversation, that’s fine. Why do other people feel like it’s their right to never hear anything mildly unpleasant ever? ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2019, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/14 "2019-06-16T11:34:09Z")
A common greeting is, “How are you?” Although it’s typically treated as rhetorical, it shouldn’t be surprise if the response is an answer. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2019, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/15 "2019-06-16T11:55:44Z")
Some people just “enjoy ill-health” ---
**Author:** ![Dana\_Scully](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5daacb/32.png) [@Dana\_Scully](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dana_Scully)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2019, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/16 "2019-06-18T18:20:18Z")
> [@Tzigone](#): > > Or they are just chit-chatting about their day, and feeling poorly has a big effect on their day. > > If people constantly bemoan their illnesses, yes, that’s annoying. If they actually answer “how’re you doing” or mention just feeling ugghy during general conversation, that’s fine. > > Why do other people feel like it’s their right to never hear anything mildly unpleasant ever? I don’t know; why don’t you tell me? ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2019, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/17 "2019-06-18T18:35:12Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > When anyone asks me how I’m doing, I usually answer, “better than can be expected”. Just because. I say, “So far, so good.” ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2019, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/18 "2019-06-19T04:38:16Z")
I have two aunts. One is always upbeat, even when she was going through cancer treatment. The other just absolutely had to let you know how absolutely horrible life is for her. A stubbed toe is the end of the world. Her second husband had to go onto oxygen, so she had to, too. So many ch of her identity is caught up in being sick ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2019, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/19 "2019-06-19T04:45:12Z")
Damn typos. I hate posting on my phone. Grrrrrr. ---
**Author:** ![The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_wind_of_my_soul)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2019, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474/20 "2019-06-19T15:59:06Z")
This is ironic, because I was complaining about people commenting on OTHER people being sick yesterday. Like if I blow my nose, some people have to be like, “Getting a cold? Allergies?” and I want to be like “Just let me blow my nose in peace!” Or if someone’s coughing up phlegm, and another person goes “You sick?” I mean, come on, what healthy person coughs up phlegm? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-it-people-telling-others-when-they-are-not-feeling-well/835474.md?page=2)