# Why is polygamy immoral? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [June 4, 2004, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652 "2004-06-04T17:02:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/21 "2004-06-05T04:10:32Z")
> [@Stonebow](#): > > Short Answer: it’s not immoral at all. As long as everyone is an adult and consents, it’s all good. > > Long answer: as **Giles** noted, it would be a nightmare to regulate. I believe that we had this discussion a few months ago, and pretty much everyone agreed that the devil was in the details. You might want to do a search on polyamoury/ polyamouraous relationships. > > And never underestimate the sour taste left in our collective mouths by the US’s history with institutionalized polygamy among splinter groups of the Mormon church- it tends toward the exploitation of women- child brides and the like. > There’s a lot to overcome to make a good case for it in practice. What Stonebow said. Polygamous marriages in the US are not “immoral” in an of themselves as a contract between adult men and women, but in practice you tend to get stuff like child brides, along with coercive, cult like environments and family structures. Thee’s also the potential for violent conflicts between patriarchs of polygamous famlies, or between patriarchs and the family of daughters the group is trying to recruit. It’s just not a practicularly good deal all around. ---
**Author:** ![Lilairen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lilairen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lilairen)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/22 "2004-06-05T04:35:53Z")
> [@astro](#): > > What Stonebow said. Polygamous marriages in the US are not “immoral” in an of themselves as a contract between adult men and women, but in practice you tend to get stuff like child brides, along with coercive, cult like environments and family structures. Thee’s also the potential for violent conflicts between patriarchs of polygamous famlies, or between patriarchs and the family of daughters the group is trying to recruit. It’s just not a practicularly good deal all around. Child brides are not a problem if age of consent for marriage is enforced. Cultlike, abusive marriages exist with monogamy, and nobody uses that as an argument against them. Most of the “patriarchs” out to “recruit” get soundly laughed out of most communities for people practicing multiple relationships. And as many women are interested in multiple relationships as men. In brief, religiously-influenced patriarchal polygyny is a poor model for the general case of polygamy, and almost certainly not the majority among people who prctice some form of multiple-adult relationship in the West. ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/23 "2004-06-05T05:46:20Z")
> [@](#): > > What Stonebow said. Polygamous marriages in the US are not “immoral” in an of themselves as a contract between adult men and women, but in practice you tend to get stuff like child brides, along with coercive, cult like environments and family structures. Thee’s also the potential for violent conflicts between patriarchs of polygamous famlies, or between patriarchs and the family of daughters the group is trying to recruit. It’s just not a practicularly good deal all around. Those effects do come along with the particular brand of polygamy practiced by the splinter groups; but I think it’s more a result of the secretiveness, control, and general ickiness of a tightly controlled separatist atmosphere than the polygamy itself. I think polygamy is fraught with potential complications, and that it must be very difficult to practice in most cases–but I don’t agree that it automatically results in abused child brides and violence. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/24 "2004-06-05T06:30:29Z")
> [@AZCowboy](#): > > It is obviously not good enough because the Bible doesn’t say so. The Bible practically endorses polygamy. Polygamy was accepted among most societies of biblical times, You ain’t just whistlin’ Dixie there. The Book of Samuel described King David as having 4 simultaneous wives, and the Book of Kings (or was it Chronicles?) described King Solomon as having _700_ wives and 300 concubines. The Pauline Letters in the NT state that _deacons_ and _ministers_ in the Church should limit themselves to one wife apiece, but place no such restriction on the general congregation. However, Biblical polygamy was a one-way street. A man could have more than one wife, but a woman could _not_ have more than one husband. Adultery was defined as sex between Man 1 and a woman who was married to Man 2; the marital status of Man 1 didn’t enter into the equation. ---
**Author:** ![Aeschines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aeschines/32/16251_2.png) [@Aeschines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aeschines)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/25 "2004-06-05T11:27:16Z")
I think it’s a great idea. Here’s basically the same OP, started by me awhile ago. > **[Gay marriage, then polyamory, please.](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=234605)** > > As a corollary to the gay marriage thread, this one. Why stop at gay marriage? Let people who want to have more than one spouse have one. You may be surprised at the number of people out there who already support polyamory, and they’re not all... ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/26 "2004-06-05T21:20:03Z")
I once read an anectdote about Abraham Lincoln. At a social gathering, he got into an argument with a Mormon over polygamy. Finally the Mormon said, “But can you point to any Scripture which expressly forbids polygamy?” “Certainly,” Lincoln replied. “‘No man can serve two masters.’” ---
**Author:** ![AZCowboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/97f17d/32.png) [@AZCowboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AZCowboy)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/27 "2004-06-05T21:43:19Z")
Not Abraham Lincoln, but Mark Twain. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/28 "2004-06-05T21:47:14Z")
> [@AZCowboy](#): > > Not Abraham Lincoln, but Mark Twain. It does sound more like Twain than Lincoln . . . I’ll look it up next time I’m at the library. ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/29 "2004-06-05T21:50:49Z")
I don’t see anything “immoral” if it’s among consenting adults. Certainly, it’s illegal, and as mentioned above, the complications that arise as more people get introduced into the marriage contract, the more difficult it becomes to litigate that contract. Simple solution: Do away with the marriage contract as a legal entity, and let people commit whatever consensual acts in their bedrooms they damn well please, short of breaking other laws (like those against homicide, or bestiality, for instance). Children are the legal responsibility of the two parents. Who owns the property? Well, who’s name is on the mortgage? And so on. It shouldn’t have to be complicated. ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2004, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652/30 "2004-06-05T21:58:40Z")
> [@](#): > > It does sound more like Twain than Lincoln . . . I’ll look it up next time I’m at the library. The anecdote can be found online, and it is indeed supposed to be Mark Twain. On the webpage, it was attributed to _A treasury of laughter_ by Louis Untermeyer, which I assume to be a garbled version of the [_Treasury of Great Humor; Including Wit, Whimsy and Satire from the Remote Past to the Present_](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0070659397/qid=1086472311/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/103-4001260-1716623?v=glance&s=books). You can find it in the library under 808.87. Abraham Lincoln didn’t have much contact with the Mormons, though he did practice law in a courthouse where Joseph Smith once went for a case. By the time Lincoln became president, the Mormons were established in Utah. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-polygamy-immoral/248652.md?page=1)