# Why is the Straight Dope running like Straight Shit? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 14, 2002, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983 "2002-05-14T06:32:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Phlip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Phlip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlip)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/1 "2002-05-14T06:32:26Z")
What the hell has happened to this wonderful website? As soon as they implemented this new sexy message board everything seems to have slowed to a screeching halt. I work mids and am on here at night mainly and for the last month or so it seems that 3 out of five times the damn board wont even load! I thought it may have been my connection at work (t-1) but it is the same story at home (cable). I can go to any other website on the non porn planet and have instant access to whatever my heart desires. Its strange because I will be surfing the SDMB at high speeds for about 20 minutes or so and then BOOM, none of the boards will load. Or they load so slowly that it is not worth waiting to see people ignore my posts. At 2am? Doesn’t make sense. Oh yeah, its not the time that the board is down for maintenance. Thats at 2:45-3am MST. Is this just a problem in Colorado? Or is everyone experienceing this phenomenon? ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/2 "2002-05-14T06:47:14Z")
Same thing here at this Europeans end. Works best during my morning, when it’s night in the US. My evenings (afternoon US) is almost impossible. I hit preview reply and can go to the kitchen and get a cup o’ java. When I come back, that little meter thing at the bottom of IE, is only halfway done. ---
**Author:** ![Truth\_Seeker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5fc32e/32.png) [@Truth\_Seeker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truth_Seeker)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/3 "2002-05-14T06:55:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\*Its strange because I will be surfing the SDMB at high speeds for about 20 minutes or so and then BOOM, none of the boards will load. \*\* I’ve noticed this myself. The board zips along quite nicely for a bit and then, BAM, nothing. Perhaps the server is selectively ignoring some IP addresses when the load gets to high. Most frustrating. ---
**Author:** ![Phlip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Phlip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlip)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/4 "2002-05-14T07:04:41Z")
At least I know its not just me now. Thats exactly how it is for me. The worst is when I type out a well thought out response to a post and I get ready to post it (so people can ignore it anyway) the shit freezes up and then I am off to literotica to chat about how big my cock is or how many chicks I have been with. Anyone ever been to the literotica board? Its not too bad. Actually some semi-normal people over there. Thought they would all be freak outs or child molesters or something, but they are just people who are horny, like me! 🙂 And if you think this board moves fast, your lucky to get a post to last 15 minutes on the front page of there general board. ---
**Author:** ![Neptune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5a626/32.png) [@Neptune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neptune)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/5 "2002-05-14T07:06:17Z")
What do expect for free? A rubber biscuit? Bar Bor bar. ---
**Author:** ![White\_Lightning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@White\_Lightning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Lightning)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/6 "2002-05-14T07:24:57Z")
Feel free to hie yourself on over to ATMB and check out the FAQs at the top of the forum that explain this, **Phlip**. If you’d like to get the story in a little more detail, the answers are only clicks away. The discussion of the pace of the board comes up pretty frequently, so you should be able to find multiple threads in that forum on the topic. ---
**Author:** ![Demosthenesian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Demosthenesian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demosthenesian)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/7 "2002-05-14T07:37:40Z")
I’d just like to know why it keeps crashing my browser. ---
**Author:** ![Caught\_Work](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/919ad9/32.png) [@Caught\_Work](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caught_Work)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/8 "2002-05-14T08:08:03Z")
You see, when the hamster dies, it takes a few minutes to get the entrails out of the little running wheely thingy and insert a new hamster. Hmmm, insert a new hamster. ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/9 "2002-05-14T12:50:41Z")
[Simpsons]Shut up! That’s why![/Simpsons] 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/10 "2002-05-14T14:57:04Z")
## +++OUT OF CHEESE ERROR+++ REDO FROM START. I’, sure some guys here will get that. ---
**Author:** ![Surreal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@Surreal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surreal)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/11 "2002-05-14T15:10:25Z")
Maybe it is being done- or it has not been fixed- because they want it slower to reduce the post volume here. If the boards are slower, it will encourage people to go away, which will reduce the volume, which will reduce the need for moderators (are they paid?). Website is now more manageable. ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/12 "2002-05-14T16:24:12Z")
Moderators… _snort_ _PAID???_ _giggle_ They can’t even use it on their resumes! (Lynn Bodoni may be paid, but he’s the Admin, not a mod.) ---
**Author:** ![Surreal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@Surreal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surreal)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/13 "2002-05-14T16:56:46Z")
Why ON EARTH would they do it if they aren’t paid? ---
**Author:** ![sidle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee59a6/32.png) [@sidle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sidle)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/14 "2002-05-14T17:00:32Z")
😕 WHA- BAH- You mean to tell me that Lynn Bodoni is MALE? That just screws up my whole mental image… Why did I not get this? So Lynn Bodoni _doesn’t_ look like a blond lady librarian? ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/15 "2002-05-14T17:22:31Z")
> [@](#): > > Why ON EARTH would they do it if they aren’t paid? It gives us something to do between bouts of “abusing” ourselves. Either that or we’re power mad fascists. And Lynn is most definitely female. And unpaid, just like all the other admins, Arnold, TubaDiva, C K Dexter Haven, Gaudere. Jill Gat is also an unpaid assisstant to Cecil; she runs the southwest branch office. Dex (and Jill) does an incredible amount of volunteer work organizing the staff reports. Tuba, and now Gaudere & Arnold, perform the more technical stuff in regards to day-to-day operation. In addition to this, there’s Jerry Davis who actually works in The Reader office filling an IT/MIS function. The boards are only one of his many duties; he, obviously, is paid for his work. This thing ain’t no chickenshit operation here. And as White Lightning has said, or at least pointed you to, is that the site is slow due to traffic; our server just can’t handle everything we ask of it. Occasionally, it bogs down and you experience degraded, or as you’ve noticed, non-existant, performance. ---
**Author:** ![CnoteChris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/278dde/32.png) [@CnoteChris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CnoteChris)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/16 "2002-05-14T19:01:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cornflakes \* > **They can’t even use it on their resumes!** Huh? What’s stopping them? ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/17 "2002-05-14T23:36:11Z")
Who needs a salary when we have the undying gratitude of the Teeming Millions, in addition to being allowed to inflict our sadistic quirks on the helpless SDMB denizens? I tried putting it on my résumé once, but at the job interview, in addition to the standard drug test (please provide us with a urine sample - we only need a small quantity the nurse said, but I figured, hey, I’ve got plenty where that came from, so I returned a brimming cup), when they saw the words “Straight Dope volunteer staff member”, I was given the full rectal probe. So now I keep it a closely guarded secret. ---
**Author:** ![Purd\_Werfect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47c2d/32.png) [@Purd\_Werfect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purd_Werfect)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/18 "2002-05-14T23:40:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Arnold Winkelried \* > \*\* …when they saw the words “Straight Dope volunteer staff member”, I was given the full rectal probe. \*\* Lucky dog. I suspected you guys got lots of wild lovin’ due to your status as moderators, and here’s the proof. ---
**Author:** ![reprise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@reprise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/reprise)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2002, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/19 "2002-05-14T23:47:01Z")
Just out of interest, are we now back on our old, tweaked, server or is that still being used by the CR for other things? ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2002, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983/20 "2002-05-15T01:00:36Z")
> [@](#): > > Is this just a problem in Colorado? Or is everyone experienceing this phenomenon? Now, I’m not gonna cite any statistics or anything, but I’d say it has a lot to do with all the college students getting out about this time and having a little extra time to go and find the coolest place to fucking be… FUCKING VIRGINIA TECH RULES! GOBBLEGOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE …but I think it might have something to do with it. By the way, I’m just an alumnus. You should see the students. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-the-straight-dope-running-like-straight-shit/108983.md?page=2)