# Why is this word allowed on the boards?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730
**Category:** About This Message Board
**Created:** [July 16, 2001, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730 "2001-07-16T22:40:09Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@TubaDiva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TubaDiva)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2001, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/21 "2001-07-17T20:25:35Z")
A slight hijack here . . .
the Victorians used a variant of the term affectionately, romantically, as “cunny.” I’ve always thought that was sweet. In that sort of context, there’s no harm and some beauty in the C word.
your humble TubaDiva
No, I don’t own a pornograph, why do you ask?
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### Author:  [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2001, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/22 "2001-07-17T20:44:20Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by pldennison \*
> But the definition to which you linked does **not** say that the word is disparaging when used to refer to the pudenda (although it does say “usually obscene”), which is exactly the context to which AHunter was referring. Because a word is disparaging in one context does not mean it is disparaging in all contexts.
I realize that pldennnison. As you say, however, the word “cunt” is qualified as _usually obscene_, whereas “dick” and “cock” are not (instead the dictionary describes them as _vulgar_), so even in the meaning used in the thread, there is a difference in degree between the word used for the female genitalia and the ones cited as an example for the male organ.
Getting back to the subject at hand, here’s my way of thinking. To describe a certain object (be it a human body part or something else), I have the choice between two words: word A is commonly considered unobjectionable; word B can be interpreted as being disparaging, and in the context is considered obscene. Which word would I, Arnold Winkelried, choose to use on a public message board? I would use word A. Would I, Arnold Winkelried, think it unreasonable to ask people, in a public forum where posters are expected to eschew insults, to refrain from using word B, and instead use word A? I would not think it unreasonable. Would I object if someone changed word B to word A? No.
[Edited by Arnold Winkelried on 07-17-2001 at 05:25 PM]
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### Author:  [@stofsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stofsky)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2001, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/23 "2001-07-17T23:58:57Z")
Gonna get all semiotic on ya ass!
Isn’t the power of a word in the listener rather than the speaker? I used the “C” word as an example of this in my frosh English classes, meaning that if I say the word in casual conversation with no disparaging intent (Nah, I didn’t fuck her up the ass, I just fucked her cunt), then the only offensiveness is in the prejudice of the receiver of the sound.
But it’s only a sound. If _you_ allow it to have power over you, then you’re giving that power away. _Remember, it’s only a sound_! Aren’t we all unignorant enough to keep that in mind? Haven’t we all read our Eco?
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### Author:  [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/24 "2001-07-18T01:07:57Z")
The power of a word is in a listener, but it also helps reveal the intent of the speaker. If I went to a message board and saw thread titles of the type
“Cornholing - how do I do it?”
“Who wants some pussy now?”
“Are unshaved clits better?”
“Nigger women vs. gooks - who fucks best?”
etc…
I would think that the people frequenting that message board are a bunch of boorish idiots, and I wouldn’t go back. So trying to maintain some standards
a) helps attract the kind of posters we like to see at the SDMB, and
b) helps turn away the kind of posters we don’t like to see here.
It’s all part of our public relations efforts.
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### Author:  [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/25 "2001-07-18T01:09:38Z")
Note - the above are examples of things **not** to do. Now that I’ve posted that, I’m having second thoughts, so I’ll ask TubaDiva to review my wording. :o
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### Author:  [@TubaDiva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TubaDiva)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/26 "2001-07-18T01:12:51Z")
Now Arnold, that’s just offensive.
your humble TubaDiva
but you did make your point.
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### Author:  [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/27 "2001-07-18T01:34:08Z")
Arnold Winklereid:
> [@](#):
>
> “Are unshaved clits better?”
Uh oh, someone ELSE need an anatomy lesson, methinks! Either that or you’ve known some…unusually…uh…
😮
anyway, I don’t think I would’ve used that one as an example!
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### Author:  [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/28 "2001-07-18T02:02:31Z")
Mr W.! Good lord. I’m flushing over here.
Such language from such a pristine mod!
woo, somebody catch me.
jarbaby
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### Author:  [@JeffB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JeffB)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/29 "2001-07-18T02:19:47Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by AHunter3 \*
> Let me see if I get this right–the girls are to refer to theirs decorously as “mons veneris” or “pudenda” or perhaps as “hoo hah” or “down there”, while we guys can speak of our cocks and dicks, is that the deal?
I thought the correct term was “cha-cha” as in “So, who put his hoo-hoo dilly in your cha-cha?”
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### Author:  [@JeffB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JeffB)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/30 "2001-07-18T02:21:01Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \*
> \*\*Mr W.! Good lord. I’m flushing over here.
>
> Such language from such a pristine mod!
>
> woo, somebody catch me.
>
> jarbaby \*\*
I never thought I’d see the day…
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### Author:  [@MaceMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaceMan)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/31 "2001-07-18T03:33:54Z")
Although I have no problem with toning down language on the boards, I do think that some of those who are so “offended” by this word should ask themselves why, and perhaps go see a local showing of the _Vagina Monologues_. Is it wrong for women to use slang to refer to their own bodies? It seems to me that the “offense” this word elicits when used in this context, is primarily that our traditionally puritanical, patriarchal society expects women to be dainty, never vulgar, nonsexual virgins afraid of enjoying or acknowledging their own bodies. Thus, a crude and strong word like that encroaches on masculine territory and offends those uncomfortable with sexual themes.
I wouldn’t use that word myself, but don’t see how it is any more offensive than the masculine equivalents when it is not being used to degrade or objectify someone.
Also, doesn’t the word _vulva_ refer to that region? it is not offensive and is certainly better understood than “pudendum.”
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### Author:  [@KellyM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KellyM)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/32 "2001-07-18T03:39:40Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by zev\_steinhardt \*
> \*\ ***Coldfire** was good enough to change it for us.
> \*\*
And incorrectly, at that. Frankly, if you have to wax (or shave) your vagina, you really need to consider suing the surgeon who did your sex change operation. That’s the only way I can think of, besides a tumor of some sort, for there ever to be hair growing out of one’s vagina.
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### Author:  [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/33 "2001-07-18T04:30:57Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Also, doesn’t the word vulva refer to that region? it is not offensive and is certainly better understood than “pudendum.”
Except you never see newbies talking about those great Swedish “pudenda.” Or what year/model are you driving. 😃
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### Author:  [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/34 "2001-07-18T14:18:02Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by KellyM \*
> \*\*
>
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by zev\_steinhardt \*
> > \*\ ***Coldfire** was good enough to change it for us.
> > \*\*
>
> And incorrectly, at that. Frankly, if you have to wax (or shave) your vagina, you really need to consider suing the surgeon who did your sex change operation. That’s the only way I can think of, besides a tumor of some sort, for there ever to be hair growing out of one’s vagina.
> \*\*
Well, shit. Do you honestly think they teach words like _pudendum_ in Dutch high school English? I was looking for a nice cover-all term that didn’t offend. Vagina it was, after a good three seconds of thought.
Now, will all you cunts get back to work already? 😉
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### Author:  [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/35 "2001-07-18T15:03:20Z")
AHunter3 - Believe it or not, but I used my “shaved” example to show that the posters at my hypothetical message board were not too bright, in addition to being vulgar.
jarbabyj - Didn’t your mother tell you to watch out for the quiet ones?
MaceMan - I made my personal judgement by looking up the word in the dictionary. But your topic may be of interest in Great Debates.
Coldfire - methinks you need to suggest an addition to the dutch high school curriculum.
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### Author:  [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/36 "2001-07-18T15:07:37Z")
What MaceMan said. My political sentiments exactly.
PS: Coldy, your anatomical faux pas is no worse than Arnold Winklereid’s. [Are unshaved clits better?]
::shudders at the thought of someone having to shave one::
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### Author:  [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/37 "2001-07-18T16:23:14Z")
Arnold, I posted that last one and then went out for coffee and only on return noticed you’d slipped a post in while I was writing mine.
So you are of course saying that as long as the posters at a hypothetical message board are none too bright, they should refrain from being vulgar?
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### Author:  [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2001, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/38 "2001-07-18T17:05:55Z")
AHunter3, I am saying that I personally would not be interested in hanging out at a message board with an unintelligent membership that uses obscene or offensive language. I am also saying that the words used by a person can give an indication of the intelligence and/or prejudices of that person.
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### Author:  [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)
#### Post date: [July 19, 2001, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/39 "2001-07-19T09:32:56Z")
Can’t we just call it “The Gates To Paradise” and move on?
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### Author:  [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)
#### Post date: [July 19, 2001, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-is-this-word-allowed-on-the-boards/72730/40 "2001-07-19T11:49:50Z")
"The Gates Of Paradise!
…but only for three weeks in four"
ahem
pan
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