# Why no, I don't care to hear you blaring the gospel at 7AM outside my bedroom window. Bitch. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 9, 2010, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578 "2010-06-09T20:56:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/21 "2010-06-19T03:38:42Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > My only solace is knowing that when I get to hell, I won’t have to deal with fucking cunts blasting the gospel from their car stereos (it’ll be rap instead). If Heaven’s playing gospel and Hell’s a rap club, I need a lot of time to think. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/22 "2010-06-19T04:44:53Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > If Heaven’s playing gospel and Hell’s a rap club, I need a lot of time to think. Yeah, I think God wishes we’d chosen His favorite analogy: **Demons blasting _POLKA_ in Hell**. Oh, and we’ll all have to participate! Square dance at noon, Drunken Polish Wedding Polka lessons at 2, 4 and 6, Texas Two-Step at 3:15. And another square dance after dinner (tonight: cold grits, tough liver, pale brocolli and a half pint of milk.) ```auto I once drew a cartoon with a dweebish guy sitting on a landing. The stairs down had a sign "Heavy Metal"; and a sign pointing upstairs said "Opera". The guy looked indecisive, sitting under the sign that said "Pugatory". Yeah, The New Yorker had pretty much the same reaction... ``` ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 9:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/23 "2010-06-19T09:00:14Z")
> [@Gukumatz](#): > > Shoulda’ jacked the tires. Just saying. > > Actually, no, that would be bad. That would mean the car would be stuck. I would certainly be tempted to do something to the tires and/or antenna. So far, I’ve resisted temptation when confronted with this sort of assholery, but I have been tempted. Also, windshield wipers are quite easy to remove. Just saying. ---
**Author:** ![DfrntBreign](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f6c823/32.png) [@DfrntBreign](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DfrntBreign)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2010, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/24 "2010-06-19T21:11:51Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > You’ve got to get out of that place. > > If it’s the last thing you ever do. > [@Rigamarole](#): > > I know, I know. It’s not really financially feasible for me to move until I finish my degree; and even then I’m still pretty unsure of what kind of job I want to get and whether I’ll be able to get it. Uuhhm, I’m not sure he really expected an answer. [In your defense, it _is_ an old song.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUpBSvN1a50) ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2010, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/25 "2010-06-20T16:14:44Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > I would certainly be tempted to do something to the tires and/or antenna. So far, I’ve resisted temptation when confronted with this sort of assholery, but I have been tempted. Also, windshield wipers are quite easy to remove. Just saying. There’s also the potato in the tailpipe trick. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2010, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/26 "2010-06-20T18:10:55Z")
I rarely carry potatoes around with me while I go about my daily business. I DO carry a knife with me. However, in case we get the Blaring Gospel Lady in our neighborhood, I’m sure that I can spare a potato for a good cause. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2010, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/27 "2010-06-20T18:20:11Z")
> [@detop](#): > > There’s also the potato in the tailpipe trick. Reminds me of a joke from _Fresh Prince of Bel Air_, where Hillary attempt a retaliation ended with her saying something to the effect of “I tried that but the potato didn’t scratch much and my keys kept falling out of the tailpipe.” ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2010, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/28 "2010-06-20T21:31:52Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > I rarely carry potatoes around with me while I go about my daily business. I DO carry a knife with me. However, in case we get the Blaring Gospel Lady in our neighborhood, I’m sure that I can spare a potato for a good cause. I agree that in that case, a knife would be the appropriate instrument. However, in the OPs case, nothing prevents him to bring a potato/banana or any other appropriate produce with him when he goes downstairs to scream at the BGL. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2010, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/29 "2010-06-20T22:00:03Z")
> [@DfrntBreign](#): > > Uuhhm, I’m not sure he really expected an answer. [In your defense, it _is_ an old song.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUpBSvN1a50) Bah, I’m 24 years old. Don’t start quoting me 60s rock lyrics like I’m supposed to be familiar with them! ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/30 "2010-06-21T06:30:13Z")
> [@detop](#): > > I agree that in that case, a knife would be the appropriate instrument. However, in the OPs case, nothing prevents him to bring a potato/banana or any other appropriate produce with him when he goes downstairs to scream at the BGL. Hmmm, does the produce need to be rich in potassium? Or will any firm produce do? I’m afraid that I had an impoverished childhood, I was fairly strictly supervised so I didn’t get into the mischief that most kids managed to get into. I’ve tried to make up for it as an adult, but it’s just not the same. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/31 "2010-06-21T11:44:45Z")
Any firm produce of the appropriate diameter will do. ---
**Author:** ![Noel\_Prosequi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b19c9b/32.png) [@Noel\_Prosequi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noel_Prosequi)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/32 "2010-06-23T05:24:29Z")
And just what makes you think the putative evangelist really was on the side of Goodness and Light? I am reminded of a campaign trick I heard of during the Nixon years (IIRC) in which workers for the Republicans would ring people at 2.00 in the morning pretending to be push-pollsters from the Democrats trying to drum up support (it may have been the other way round - I don’t mean to slight the Republicans particularly. Neither side tends to have clean hands in these things). If I was Satan’s ad agency, it’s what I’d do. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/33 "2010-06-23T09:52:04Z")
I 'd imagine blowing up the gospelmobile quite happily ---
**Author:** ![Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superfluous_Parentheses)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/34 "2010-06-23T10:00:26Z")
So the doors are open and it’s right outside your window? Next time, throw a bucket of water in there. ---
**Author:** ![Dante](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dante/32/9673_2.png) [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/35 "2010-06-23T12:49:32Z")
> [@detop](#): > > Any firm produce of the appropriate diameter will do. Tramp. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/36 "2010-06-23T13:43:17Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > I rarely carry potatoes around with me while I go about my daily business. I DO carry a knife with me. _Bringing in the shivs Bringing in the shivs We shall come rejoycing…_ ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f07891/32.png) [@Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Plastic_Ninja)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578/37 "2010-06-24T04:46:59Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > I never have understood why people think being an asshole will make people want to convert to your point of view. I find that asshole Christians are a more popular reason to reject Christianity than not believing in God. A lot of times it’s because they don’t actually think they’re going to convert you. They’re hoping you’re hateful and oppressive so they can pretend they’re marginalized cultists without traveling back to ancient Rome or converting to Scientology. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-i-dont-care-to-hear-you-blaring-the-gospel-at-7am-outside-my-bedroom-window-bitch/542578.md?page=1)