# Why no moderator action on this insult? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [October 4, 2017, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922 "2017-10-04T05:04:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/1 "2017-10-04T05:04:58Z")
I made [a thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=837801) in IMHO asking for legal advice. I got this piece of unprovoked nastiness in reply > [@Stopping a house clearance. Need answer fast.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stopping-a-house-clearance-need-answer-fast/797798/8): > > Understand that the solicitor that you have been talking to regards you as a feckless wimp. Sort of like a little gnat that might be an annoyance she can ignore or swat and kill. She and her colleagues are probably chuckling that you think they’re going to help you… I reported it, of course. A day later, and no action taken. I wondered if I’d forgotten to send my report, so I reported it again. Many hours later, still no action. All three IMHO mods have had forum activity since my report, so it must have been seen. Why no action? It seems to be a clear personal insult. Threadshitting, too. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/2 "2017-10-04T05:29:11Z")
I read your thread, and did a bit of a double take on that comment. But I didn’t interpret it as “unprovoked nastiness” or an insult. I just thought it was (albeit in flowery terms) making a valid point that these solicitors have no duty to help you, that you are probably just an annoyance to them; and that you must retain your own solicitor and take action in order to get any satisfaction here. ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/3 "2017-10-04T05:44:21Z")
I just read it, and I agree with **Riemann**. I don’t think the poster was insulting you directly, but rather giving his/her guess as to the solicitor’s attitude. ---
**Author:** ![Alley\_Dweller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alley_dweller/32/430_2.png) [@Alley\_Dweller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alley_Dweller)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/4 "2017-10-04T06:39:55Z")
I am sorry that you took that as an insult. I was trying to explain to you why the lawyer was abusing you. You said the lawyer did not return your phone calls for a whole month. And now that she has returned your call she is saying your stuff will be destroyed in a few days. But your post indicated that you were still expecting her boss to help you. I wanted to wake you up to the fact that she is not your friend and does not work for you and neither does her boss. She is treating you badly. My intention was to tell you what SHE is thinking behind your back. And she is. You need to get a lawyer of your own to confront her. Not in a few months, you need to get one now before your stuff is destroyed. I am sorry if that hurt you. I do not think you are a feckless wimp. I was saying what the lawyer is thinking. Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/5 "2017-10-04T07:35:41Z")
Of COURSE it’s an insult. AS for your advice, you are just repeating what I said in the first post. The solicitor said she would look into what she could do to help me, messed me around for a month, and then told me she won’t o0r can;t do anything. You tell me that “She is not [my] friend and does not work for [me]” I know that already. It’s a pretty big part of the problem. I specified this in my question. Nor am I “expecting her boss to help [me]” I’ve asked her boss to stop the clearance. I’m not expecting to get any help with my sister. Your comments are unhelpful at best. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/6 "2017-10-04T07:46:22Z")
My understanding is that insults are fine, as long as it isn’t a Doper who is being insulted. And in this case I’m not sure anyone was insulted: **Alley Dweller** just used colorful language. _ **Strong words make an impression.** _ Had you heard **Alley Dweller** ’s remark a month ago they might have awoken you to the need for an alternate course. Certainly in my life I’ve made many mistakes where harsh advice might have prodded me to smarter action. ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/7 "2017-10-04T07:49:44Z")
That was not a personal insult, to me it reads far more like a comment on the attitudes of the solicitors you were contacting. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/8 "2017-10-04T08:25:20Z")
I also did not read that as directed at you, and I was also unclear that you understood that these solicitors were not going to help you at all, ever. (I’m still not clear that you understand that to be honest.) ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 9:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/9 "2017-10-04T09:54:17Z")
I don’t see a personal insult. I see **Alley Dweller** offering a sincere apology for a perceived insult that was totally and ungraciously ignored by the OP. mmm ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/10 "2017-10-04T12:33:43Z")
It is describing the situation from another perspective, which can be helpful, even though it may not be from a pleasant one. You are the one asking for legal advice/opinions on this board, it does not look like you liked the answers you got, but yes I agree with the others it does not rise to the level of a personal insult, it is more of you don’t like the answer. You may just be too close to the ‘subject’ to see it objectively. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/11 "2017-10-04T13:00:14Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > That was not a personal insult, to me it reads far more like a comment on the attitudes of the solicitors you were contacting. Yet another vote for this. I interpreted it as **Alley Dweller** explains in this thread. “The lawyer sees you as…” is a statement about the lawyer, not about you. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/12 "2017-10-04T13:06:40Z")
I agree with most of the posters here-- looks like the insult was directed at the solicitor, not you. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/13 "2017-10-04T13:08:03Z")
Not an insult, it’s attempting to explain why a 3rd party is acting the way they are. It says nothing about the OP. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/14 "2017-10-04T14:09:46Z")
> [@Peter\_Morris](#): > > Nor am I “expecting her boss to help [me]” I’ve asked her boss to stop the clearance. Expecting her boss to stop the clearance is expecting her boss to help you, as stopping the clearance is a thing you want. What you seem to be missing and what the ‘insult’ was trying to get across to you is that the people you’re talking to simply have no interest in helping you and that asking them to do things for you is at best a waste of time and at worst is going to get your stuff destroyed. You say that you get this, but your responses don’t really seem to bear that out. Moderators aren’t going to give people a warning for saying that people who aren’t interested in helping you aren’t interested in helping you even if they use flowery language to do it. ---
**Author:** ![Razncain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9d8465/32.png) [@Razncain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Razncain)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/15 "2017-10-04T14:29:30Z")
It’s not a personal insult. Think virtually everyone will understand…except you. I’m sure that still won’t change your mind though, and you should reflect on why everyone else perceives it differently than you, but doubt you will though. Even after poster apologized when you took it personally, although it wasn’t intended as such, you still want to play it up. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/16 "2017-10-04T14:35:38Z")
I too see no personal insult in the cited post. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/17 "2017-10-04T15:18:49Z")
Start withe the phrase, “Understand that the solicitor that you have been talking to regards you as a. . .” Fill it in with any description: handsome man smart person tall blonde company owner nice guy Do you think in any of those examples the poster was paying you a direct compliment? Making a judgment on your moral character? ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/18 "2017-10-04T15:21:04Z")
> [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](#): > > I don’t see a personal insult. > > I see **Alley Dweller** offering a sincere apology for a perceived insult that was totally and ungraciously ignored by the OP. > mmm Agreed. I thought **Alley Dweller** ’s remarks in post #4 of this thread were quite gracious. A bit of a thank you to him for taking the time to explain wouldn’t be amiss. . ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2017, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-no-moderator-action-on-this-insult/797922/19 "2017-10-04T16:10:13Z")
> [@Peter\_Morris](#): > > Of COURSE it’s an insult. > > AS for your advice, you are just repeating what I said in the first post. The solicitor said she would look into what she could do to help me, messed me around for a month, and then told me she won’t o0r can;t do anything. > > You tell me that “She is not [my] friend and does not work for [me]” I know that already. It’s a pretty big part of the problem. I specified this in my question. > > Nor am I “expecting her boss to help [me]” I’ve asked her boss to stop the clearance. I’m not expecting to get any help with my sister. > > Your comments are unhelpful at best. Do you really have time to waste on this misguided crusade? Don’t you have a course of legal action you need to undertake IMMEDIATELY, lest you lose your property? A friend who points out that someone else is insulting you is not insulting you. They’re pointing out that you’re being insulted, which you seem to not be picking up on (because you still seem to be relying on the good will and assistance of the very person disrespecting you).