# Why shouldn't boys hit girls if...? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 2, 2004, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837 "2004-04-02T02:55:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837/21 "2004-04-02T20:04:54Z")
Reminds me of a story. Years ago, I was out with a group of friends (most of whom I’ve lost contact with; not relevant). Actually, it was two groups pressed into one: me and a couple of people I knew, a friend of one of those people I didn’t know, and a couple of friends of that person. Make sense? Two groups not known to each other except via the intersection of common friends. Anyway, the point is, a woman in the other group was flirting with a guy in my group. Her idea of flirting was teasing, saying sort of mean and inflammatory things about guys in general and our guy in particular, but with that twinkle that’s supposed to mean, it’s all in fun, I really like you. (No, I don’t get why this stuff lasts past early adolescence into adulthood either.) The guy recognized that she was flirting clumsily, and she was pretty cute so he was putting up with it on the chance that she’d sleep with him later, but we could see his fuse starting to burn. Her little digs and snarky attitude were beginning to wear on all of us, but on him especially because she was favoring him with most of her attention. Finally, he’d had enough. Apparently deciding that the upside of maybe getting into her pants wasn’t worth the downside of tolerating her crap, he snapped at her. Told her to shut the hell up, she didn’t know him, and he was sick of her shit. She slapped him. She hit him hard enough to leave a mark and rock his head, but not so hard that he would have a bruise later. Just: whack. Then she giggled, glancing at her friends. They sort of smiled back at her. She obviously thought this was part of the cute-and-funny escalation of conflict that passed for flirting in her world. And she thought hitting the guy was a joke; she had that sparkle in the eye that said, what are you gonna do? I’m a woman, I get a free slap. You can’t hit me back, ha ha. Which, after a couple of seconds, is exactly what he did. Hard. Not a backhand: an open slap across the face. _WHACK._ Silence at the table. She stared at him in shock. Her eyes were bright, watering slightly from the sting. He raised his eyebrows at her: _That’s what you get._ From that point on, she was exceedingly well behaved, and an hour and a half later, she was in bed with him. People are strange. ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837/22 "2004-04-02T21:38:27Z")
> [@Rico](#): > > “Son, remember, never hit a lady. But also remember, once she hits you, she’s not a lady anymore.” Nice quote; I’ll have to remember that. My gut feeling is the same as for bullies – once the other person started it, you’re justified to finish it. ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837/23 "2004-04-02T23:56:22Z")
> [@rjung](#): > > Nice quote; I’ll have to remember that. > > My gut feeling is the same as for bullies – once the other person started it, you’re justified to finish it. That’s along the lines of what I’m thinking of telling any boys I might have someday. You don’t start fights, you finish them and you don’t get physical unless they do first. And be careful fighting girls, because they fight dirty. ---
**Author:** ![Cardinal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardinal/32/4000_2.png) [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2004, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837/24 "2004-04-03T03:24:47Z")
I think there’s one excuse for violence: Dealing with people who think there’s every excuse for it. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2004, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837/25 "2004-04-03T03:59:06Z")
I like to consider myself a gentleman. As such, I would never hit a woman, under normal circumstances. But I’d never hit a _man_ under normal circumstances, either. I’ve never been in a fight, and hope never to. But I wouldn’t hesitate to defend myself or another from attack, if the situation demanded it. (Like if I was in a war, or something. You know what I mean.) ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2004, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837/26 "2004-04-03T04:46:03Z")
It’s not nice to hit people. It is permissible and sometimes necessary to hit someone in self-defense, or perhaps in defense of another, but it is only OK to use sufficient force. Evander Holyfield has no business smacking some drunken fool as hard as he can even if the drunken fool is throwing punches at him. Gender has nothing to do with it. ---
**Author:** ![Teelo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@Teelo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teelo)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2004, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837/27 "2004-04-03T07:15:34Z")
This is a very interesting thread. One time I was out in the city with my two best friends. I had a bottle of coke with me which I decided to leave in my buddys car while we went to look around in ‘Best Buy’. He decided he didnt want it in his car and took it out and placed it on the hood, my OTHER friend thought it would be real funny to punch the bottle and knock it off the car. The coke was fine, being bottled and all but I still gave **her** 3 hard punches on the arm! It wasn’t exactly mean spirited, and we werent mad at each other, but still I think she deserved it. She likes being a brat anyways, probably to just get our attention. Anyways: _You don’t ‘un fizz’ a mans coke._ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-shouldnt-boys-hit-girls-if/237837.md?page=1)