# Why the fuck do I read mommy boards? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 19, 2011, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847 "2011-09-19T18:05:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![sugaree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@sugaree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sugaree)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/21 "2011-09-20T00:34:21Z")
> [@ballardfam](#): > > I’ve never understood advocating for liver - it filters the blood, therefore always seemed like it’d be one of the least clean/safe parts of an animal to eat. It’s usually the first to go for drug addicts & alcoholics. I avoid drug addicts and alcoholics, eating only the sober and clean-living. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/22 "2011-09-20T01:01:53Z")
> [@sugaree](#): > > I avoid drug addicts and alcoholics, eating only the sober and clean-living. Good advice. Thanks for fighting ignorance 'round these parts. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/23 "2011-09-20T01:07:48Z")
I seriously believe that Idiocracy is really in the process of happening. While smart people spend their reproductive years hanging out in grad school, the people who can’t accomplish anything else in life or simply do not understand the instructions on the box of condoms are breeding. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/24 "2011-09-20T01:10:06Z")
> [@Sattua](#): > > Fuck. After about a three month hiatus, I checked in on the pregnancy and motherhood message board that I used to read. > > My due date club was awesome. It was totally helpful, and still is, to be in contact with a few moms going through the same things I am. > > But the general forums? OH MY FUCKING GOD. What a bunch of brainless bints. When I’m not participating in the thread it’s amusing in a scary way (“i have gestational diabetes and am so hungry but dont know what to eat i know protein and stuff but i dont know whats high in protein so far today ive had a bowl of fruity pebbles and two hersheys kisses what should i eat?”). > > But lord, WHY THE HELL did I have to try to participate? The thread had been pretty interesting up to the point when I replied, but now the responses are so poorly written that I can’t even figure out whether I’m being agreed with or attacked. > > THESE PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO RAISE CHILDREN? Jesus wept. > > I’m gonna go slap myself. Link? ---
**Author:** ![Lasciel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e79b87/32.png) [@Lasciel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lasciel)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/25 "2011-09-20T02:33:30Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Link? Masochist. ---
**Author:** ![Vita\_Beata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@Vita\_Beata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vita_Beata)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/26 "2011-09-20T03:14:21Z")
> [@ballardfam](#): > > I’ve never understood advocating for liver - it filters the blood, therefore always seemed like it’d be one of the least clean/safe parts of an animal to eat. It’s usually the first to go for drug addicts & alcoholics. I reread that recommended diet: 40% fat, mega dosage of vitamin A and choice of adding optional squirrel or guinea pig liver. Extra whoosh factor. :smack: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/27 "2011-09-20T03:44:57Z")
> [@Duke](#): > > **tygre** has been on a few of these boards. I think nowadays she’s only on for the snark factor…recently someone on her board has loudly and unceasingly touted the benefits of bone broth, raw liver, and cow brains as the best diet for her and everyone else’s kids. She straightfacedly suggested that “if your kids don’t like bone broth, freeze it and make popsicles out of it.” Well, I suppose that’s one way of stopping the kids from raiding the freezer. Our local zoo recently prepared [birthday treats](http://nationalzoo.si.edu/Animals/GreatCats/LionUpdates/firstbirthday.cfm) for its lion cubs when they turned one year old. They consisted of “ice, two whole cow femurs cut in half, five pounds of shaved beef, and a half-gallon of cow blood.” (link includes pics). ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/28 "2011-09-20T06:18:25Z")
> [@Sattua](#): > > “i have gestational diabetes and am so hungry but dont know what to eat i know protein and stuff but i dont know whats high in protein so far today ive had a bowl of fruity pebbles and two hersheys kisses what should i eat?” Isn’t that typical? As soon as you get a new supply of protein, you don’t need it any more. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/29 "2011-09-20T06:31:38Z")
Fruity pebbles have protein??!? ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/30 "2011-09-20T06:39:10Z")
I’ve been to these sites too, on a lark. I feel like the average doper nonparent, even one who absolutely hates kids, knows more about parenting. ---
**Author:** ![tnetennba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tnetennba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tnetennba)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/31 "2011-09-20T11:56:53Z")
The worst participants are the lecturing “experts” who don’t know what the hell they’re talking about. The ones who think unrefrigerated water will kill your child and that if you wash car seat straps with a non-approved cleaners you have to order new ones and keep the baby at home until they arrive. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/32 "2011-09-20T12:10:46Z")
My favorites - cause mine are older and I’ve gotten past the feeding insanity - are the ones that infantilize their children. “Of course my twelve year old son goes into the ladies room with me! There are OMG child predators out there!!!” “My husband and I want to go out to dinner and my mother can’t watch the kids. Do you think it would be ok to let my 13 and 14 olds stay home by themself for a few hours?” ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/33 "2011-09-20T12:34:55Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > “My husband and I want to go out to dinner and my mother can’t watch the kids. Do you think it would be ok to let my 13 and 14 olds stay home by themself for a few hours?” In fairness, I know some 13 and 14 years olds who aren’t really capable of looking after themselves even for a few hours. Mind you, I have the same opinion of the 18 or 19 year olds who live upstairs from me, so I may just be a grumpy old bag. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/34 "2011-09-20T12:35:41Z")
> [@SciFiSam](#): > > Although I mist admit I rather like this piss-taking thread on there:[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am\_i\_being\_unreasonable/a1303037-The-ideal-school](http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/a1303037-The-ideal-school) To be fair, this is a brilliant idea: > [@](#): > > In fact, it probably just shouldn’t have other parents. It’s always the other parents who are unreasonable. ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/35 "2011-09-20T15:46:41Z")
> [@Vita\_Beata](#): > > [URL=“[http://http](http://http)://www.healingourchildren.org/pregnancy\_health\_diet\_lactation.htm”] > I googled, “bone broth, raw liver, cow brains” and came up with the above. That has to be a joke .. doesn’t it? All these hard to come by foods and “I do not recommend the use of most whole grains” ?!? > > Is this what is called around here a “whoosh”? Apparently it’s some madness called the “paleo diet”, which claims that if we all just ate like cavemen, our illnesses would cure themselves. Yeah, I’m buying this. **tygre** says the woman advocating this is…a little crocked. To put it mildly. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/36 "2011-09-20T15:47:19Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > On a related note, I am currently a pregnant mother, and I have a question for you… were there 3 to go proteens or yesterday the hungry feelings stopped? KTHX!!! \<3 \<3 \<3 BABIES! \*\*drew \*\*ol’ buddy, if YOU’RE preggers all the hungry proteens in the world aren’t gonna help \<3 BABBY’S!!! ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/37 "2011-09-20T15:50:51Z")
> [@Duke](#): > > Apparently it’s some madness called the “paleo diet”, which claims that if we all just ate like cavemen, our illnesses would cure themselves. Yeah, I’m buying this. > > **tygre** says the woman advocating this is…a little crocked. To put it mildly. We would almost certainly see a lot less geriatric diseases - you know, what with dying in our forties from galloping parasitic infections and so forth… ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/38 "2011-09-20T15:55:03Z")
I’m just back from taking Mimi to Baby Story Time at the library. Turns out that the mom who never uses a playpen, ever, has also never given her eight-month-old a bottle, ever. Just nursing. She brought her husband along and henpecked him about where to sit, how to sit, how to participate in the games and songs. I’m gonna be charitable and say she’s not a psycho bitch, she’s just fucking _exhausted_ from living up to her own stupid expectations. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/39 "2011-09-20T16:45:34Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > \ > Possibly the scariest thing of all is that a lot of the worst offenders declare that they’re homeschoolers. I’d have to agree with that. They want to keep their stupid at full strength, not getting diluted with modern societal ideas (like childhood vaccinations). > [@BigT](#): > > I’ve been to these sites too, on a lark. I feel like the average doper nonparent, even one who absolutely hates kids, knows more about parenting. It’s true, I do. 🙂 (That was a joke, for the humour-impaired out there. I don’t actually hate kids.) ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2011, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847/40 "2011-09-20T16:58:13Z")
I often wonder what the male version of henpecking would be. Cock-spurring? Hard to picture a human equivalent. Enjoy, Steven [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-the-fuck-do-i-read-mommy-boards/596847.md?page=3)