# Why was this useage of "queer" offensive? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [April 5, 2022, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320 "2022-04-05T15:04:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/41 "2022-04-05T16:40:20Z")
> [@chela](#): > > We’re you offended by the usage, did you jump to some malignant conclusion about the usage, was yours and others reaction possibly over inflated?.. Once again, please make your point if you have one. This thread is not twenty questions about my personal feelings. If your view is that I or others are overreacting, or that the moderation was inappropriate, stop being coy and just say so, explaining your reasons. ---
**Author:** ![RitterSport](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rittersport/32/6326_2.png) [@RitterSport](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RitterSport)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/42 "2022-04-05T16:40:42Z")
It’s a pretty fine line – if **Turble** had said “queer couples” instead of “queers”, there would be no problem. If it’s true that **Turble** is gay or queer, it’s practically a slip of the tongue, if he’s used to using it as a noun with his friends. I see where the warning came from, but I think a note would also have worked just as well. I don’t think there was malicious intent. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/43 "2022-04-05T16:44:11Z")
> [@Turble](#): > > If I end up getting banned for being an old queer atheistic Jew … well, so be it. I will say that, prior to this thread, I knew none of this about you\*. When I read your post in the other thread, it came across, to me, as the sort of post which would have written by a straight white person, who feels that they don’t need commercials to lecture them about how society has changed. And, given that context (or lack thereof), use of the word came across, to me, as somewhere between casually insensitive and insulting. \*- To be fair, the number of Dopers about whom I know much of anything about can be listed on one hand. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/44 "2022-04-05T16:46:08Z")
This thread baffles me. “Queer” has been in the process of reclamation for decades. All my clients and students use queer to refer to themselves. My resume is full of attended professional conferences and presentations wirh queer in their titles. It is widely culturally accepted. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/45 "2022-04-05T16:46:37Z")
> [@susan](#): > > My resume is full of attended professional conferences and presentations wirh queer in their titles. As a noun? ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/46 "2022-04-05T16:47:38Z")
Both noun and adjective. Sometimes with -ing as a verb. ---
**Author:** ![RitterSport](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rittersport/32/6326_2.png) [@RitterSport](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RitterSport)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/47 "2022-04-05T16:49:03Z")
It’s the noun vs. adjective difference. “All these students identify as queer”…OK. “All the students are queers”…likely offensive. “Liberace was a famous queer piano player”…OK. “Liberace was a famous queer”…likely offensive. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/48 "2022-04-05T16:49:05Z")
> [@susan](#): > > Both noun and adjective. Can you cite some references to its reclaimed use as a noun? I’m more than happy to have my ignorance fought if that’s the case, but I’ve never seen it (except in the tongue-in-cheek / sardonic manner already mentioned). ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/49 "2022-04-05T16:55:04Z")
Not at this instant but next time I encounter it I’ll post. I agree its more frequent as an adjective. This is paywalled, but for those wondering how msinstream queer is, here’s the NYT, from today’s Books email: > **[‘I Just Want Something That’s Gay and Happy’: L.G.B.T.Q. Romance Is Booming](https://www.nytimes.com/2022/03/30/books/lgbtq-romance-novels.html)** > > Sales of queer romance novels have surged, with books coming from the biggest publishers and prominently displayed at mainstream retailers. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/50 "2022-04-05T17:05:15Z")
> [@susan](#): > > Not at this instant Then I guess I’m unsure what you’re finding baffling about this thread. I’m pretty sure that nobody is disputing that (a) it is widely used as a reclaimed word, and (b) that it has a long history as a slur. The problem arose from the context in which it was used, and in particular the fact that it was used as a noun. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/51 "2022-04-05T17:07:13Z")
1. I have a job. 2. The noun-verb distincton isn’t meaningful to me so I don’t have examples sorted into those categories. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/52 "2022-04-05T17:09:31Z")
I’m going to downgrade the warning to just a modnote shortly. This is after a modloop discussion and the input in this thread. There seems to be enough people on both sides of this where the warning seems extreme. As @Turble identifies as queer and some of the staff that also do disagree with the warning. I’m trying to find the right wording for the modnote to remind people that the use of queer as a noun in particular in a negative post can be taken as offensive by many. ---
**Author:** ![RitterSport](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rittersport/32/6326_2.png) [@RitterSport](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RitterSport)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/53 "2022-04-05T17:14:39Z")
Seems like a good outcome to me. Thanks for taking a second look. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/54 "2022-04-05T17:16:10Z")
Very reasonable outcome. ---
**Author:** ![filmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7993a0/32.png) [@filmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filmore)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/55 "2022-04-05T17:20:03Z")
I see this situation similar to word “niggardly”. That word has a real meaning of being overly miserly, but clearly it is similar to a racial slur. If you use it in a general situation, like on a message board or in a presentation, it better be used in a context which is 100% not going to be confused with a racial insult. The possibility of confusion should be self-evident. If in doubt, don’t use it at all. With something like the SDMB, I would argue that a word like queer should only be used to describe yourself to avoid this kind of unavoidable confusion. This is a public board with thousands of people with varying backgrounds. There’s a good chance that some of the readers will take the word as a slur regardless of the context in which it’s used. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/56 "2022-04-05T17:20:08Z")
Thank you, @What_Exit. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/57 "2022-04-05T17:21:38Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > As @Turble identifies as queer and some of the staff that also do disagree with the warning. > > I’m trying to find the right wording for the modnote to remind people that the use of queer as a noun in particular in a negative post can be taken as offensive by many. I think what needs to be clarified is whether someone who identifies as queer has license to use the word in an idiosyncratic manner that is _by general social norms_ considered offensive. Because, for obvious reasons in an online forum, that would be a problematic precedent to set. ---
**Author:** ![mordecaiB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mordecaib/32/7725_2.png) [@mordecaiB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mordecaiB)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/58 "2022-04-05T17:23:59Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > I’m going to downgrade the warning to just a modnote shortly. Good call. It’s not like you should be expected to know everyone’s ethnicity, gender etc. when you have to make a call. Queer in particular is a tough one, as we’ve seen here, as some gay people don’t like the use of it either. > [@What\_Exit](#): > > Let me add as just one poster, those that ask for bright line rules are usually the ones most likely to try and rule lawyer. This, however, is wrong. 😀 ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/59 "2022-04-05T17:25:03Z")
It is tricky as usual. - “I’m queer” _is no problem._ - “I am a queer” _is weirdly worded but not actionable._ - “queers and mixed race couples” _probably shouldn’t be used as many posters are going to find it offensive._ - In a serious rant “queers are assholes” _is pretty much hate speech._ ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320/60 "2022-04-05T17:28:25Z")
But that doesn’t address my question at all. The question is whether people who identify in a certain way are to be held to different standards. I mean, obviously when their identity is an intrinsic part of the specific post, as in referring to yourself as “an old queer”, that’s no problem. But in general we cannot assume that we all know who people are, and new people certainly won’t know. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-was-this-useage-of-queer-offensive/962320.md?page=4)