# Why Would A Wookie Want to Jerk Off to Diahann Carroll? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 7, 2003, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988 "2003-10-07T02:45:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/21 "2003-10-07T14:22:16Z")
I’m kinda sorta glad I didn’t see this when it first aired; I think it would have warped my fragile little mind. Though I’m oddly curious now. What the hell is [this?](http://www.timewarptv.com/site/programs/Star_Wars_Holiday_Special/images/Image9.jpg) And [this?](http://www.timewarptv.com/site/programs/Star_Wars_Holiday_Special/images/Image11.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/22 "2003-10-07T14:45:18Z")
[![](http://www.stomptokyo.com/sings/swholiday/images/bea3.jpg) ](http://www.stomptokyo.com/sings/swholiday/images/bea3.jpg) “Damn It, George Lucas…! I’m Not one of the puppets…!” ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/23 "2003-10-07T14:45:36Z")
> [@](#): > > Why Would A Wookie Want to Jerk Off to Diahann Carroll? Is this a trick question? It’s a trick question, right? A: To get to the other side. ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/24 "2003-10-07T14:50:26Z")
I have the CD for this… Including the wonderful ditty “What do you give a Wookie when he’s already got a comb?” I can’t make this crap up. ---
**Author:** ![Super\_Gnat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Super\_Gnat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Super_Gnat)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/25 "2003-10-07T15:03:49Z")
Long, long ago, someone posted a link to it on a site in some Slavic (I think) language. I wonder if that’s still up. ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/26 "2003-10-07T15:26:49Z")
**Knowed Out** , I feel the same way about _Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band_ starring the Bee Gees and Peter Frampton. It hurt like hell to watch it, but I feel I’m a better person for having had the experience. That which doesn’t kill me makes me stronger. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/27 "2003-10-07T16:04:46Z")
Look at Carrie Fisher in that show. She was stoned out her gourd during the entire production. Not a bad idea, all things considered… ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/28 "2003-10-07T16:14:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cuauhtemoc \* > \*\*It hurt like hell to watch it, but I feel I’m a better person for having had the experience. That which doesn’t kill me makes me stronger. \*\* Then anyone who watches this should have the strength of Hercules. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/29 "2003-10-07T17:46:39Z")
Somehow, I have managed to get this far in life with no knowledge of this “production”. I guess I coulda gone a bit longer. * * * Delta-32 Skee-doo! ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/30 "2003-10-07T17:56:53Z")
I’m a diehard SW fan and even I have never watched it…and hopefully never will. I still don’t know what posessed George to give the go-ahead for this one… ---
**Author:** ![NotMrKnowItAll](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/6bbea6/32.png) [@NotMrKnowItAll](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NotMrKnowItAll)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/31 "2003-10-07T18:21:02Z")
I found it on the web today quite easily and now it sits in my /tmp directory. Hope the power doesn’t fail or it’s toast. Just google for “The Star Wars Holiday Special” and you’ll find it. I found it in a shadowly futuristic site. (I’d post a link, but I suspect that would be a no-no, bad user, no cookie sort of thing) ---
**Author:** ![tramp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@tramp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tramp)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/32 "2003-10-07T18:25:45Z")
I have a copy of this. The best thing about it are the commercials. The movie sucked but my brother and I laughed so hard at the commercials, I almost peed myself. ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/33 "2003-10-07T18:46:06Z")
Ahhh. Star Wars Lite. Makes me infinitely glad I’ve left my television off for over two years. From all that preceeds my reply, I can only hope this entertainment travesty was assembled before the advent of Jar Jar Binks. I have a feeling he would be the crown jewel for this little caper. It’s clear to me, **Tuck** , that I’ve got to get that book package sent off to you. “Ringworld” would be a lot healthier of a diet than this. Even if you just cut out the pages and pasted them over your television screen. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/34 "2003-10-07T21:58:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor \* > \*\*Look at Carrie Fisher in that show. \*\* You know, I tried, but it was just too painful to stare that closely at the screen to look for it. I think that even if it had been “Slave Lea” I couldn’t have stared that closely at the screen. It’s **that** bad. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/35 "2003-10-07T22:18:27Z")
No one seems to be overly concerned that Jefferson Starship is singing into a glowing vibrator. ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/36 "2003-10-07T23:43:59Z")
I dimly recall seeing this on TV, and have never seen it since. Am I correct in thinking there was a wookie named “Itchy”? And by the way, that is, hands-down, the most awesome thread title ever. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/37 "2003-10-08T00:01:20Z")
[Stomp Tokyo’s review](http://www.stomptokyo.com/movies/star-wars-holiday-special.html) ---
**Author:** ![Nightsong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nightsong/32/3083_2.png) [@Nightsong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightsong)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/38 "2003-10-08T00:19:32Z")
And don’t forget the Muppets episode that featured Star Wars characters as guests! _evil grin_ * * * \<\< [BREAKFAST.COM](http://BREAKFAST.COM) Halted…Cereal Port Not Responding \>\> ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/39 "2003-10-08T00:55:15Z")
That was totally solid though, **Nightsong**. Heh heh-- Darth Gonzo. Precious. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2003, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988/40 "2003-10-08T01:52:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jackelope \* > \*\*I dimly recall seeing this on TV, and have never seen it since. Am I correct in thinking there was a wookie named “Itchy”? > > And by the way, that is, hands-down, the most awesome thread title ever. \*\* Thanks, **jack**. Itchy’s Chewie’s father, but if you think that’s bad, Chewie’s kid is named “Lumpy.”:eek: [Frankly, I think **Crunchy Frog** needs a copy of this to watch.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=178347) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-would-a-wookie-want-to-jerk-off-to-diahann-carroll/205988.md?page=3)