# Wife for Hire **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 28, 2005, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627 "2005-04-28T21:58:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/1 "2005-04-28T21:58:57Z")
Saw a sign on a vehicle this afternoon: **Wife for Hire:** [ul] [li] Cooking[/li][li] Shopping[/li][li] [something][/li][li] [something] [/ul][/li]Sadly, the vehicle was past before I could see what the other two possible items were. But fortunately I have the resources and brainpower of the SDMB to help fill in the blanks. Now, I’m sure it was something boring like “cleaning” in the next slot, but we can do _much_ better than that, I’m sure. So, what other things would you expect of a “Wife for Hire” business? ---
**Author:** ![fluiddruid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fluiddruid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fluiddruid)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/2 "2005-04-28T22:04:13Z")
Occasional Sexings? ---
**Author:** ![CWN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bc79bd/32.png) [@CWN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CWN)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/3 "2005-04-28T22:09:37Z")
Birthing? Nagging? I got nothing ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/4 "2005-04-28T22:15:02Z")
Sewing? Cleaning? Screwing? Nagging? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Unkempt\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b782af/32.png) [@The\_Unkempt\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Unkempt_One)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/5 "2005-04-28T22:15:08Z")
Sponge bathing? Lobster trapping? ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/6 "2005-04-28T22:17:11Z")
> [@The Unkempt One](#): > > Lobster trapping? Probably that one. ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/7 "2005-04-28T22:24:46Z")
Writhing? Squireling? ---
**Author:** ![Corii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/aeb1de/32.png) [@Corii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corii)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/8 "2005-04-28T22:28:35Z")
Defenestrating. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/9 "2005-04-28T22:33:20Z")
> [@Corii](#): > > Defenestrating. I don’t know what you all do up in the heathen PNW, but down here we’ve got certain codes of conduct. A proper woman _never_ defenstrates for money. Indeed! ---
**Author:** ![askeptic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@askeptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/askeptic)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/10 "2005-04-28T22:36:05Z")
Somebody is going to storm in and say we all hate women pretty soon… but till then have fun. ---
**Author:** ![Zabali\_Clawbane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecd19e/32.png) [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/11 "2005-04-28T22:57:32Z")
Probably one was “laundry”, maybe something like “pet care” as one, or as others have suggested, cleaning? I wonder if she’s offering a similar thing to the “Husband for hire” businesses, where a guy will come and change lightbulbs and do basic home maintainnce, maybe mow the lawn for elderly widows? ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/12 "2005-04-28T23:37:28Z")
Beekeeping. Sluice boat-assisted goldpanning. You’ll understand once you slog through [this classic thread.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=212249&highlight=Ukraine) ---
**Author:** ![YellowTail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/b5ac83/32.png) [@YellowTail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YellowTail)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wife-for-hire/301627/13 "2005-04-28T23:44:01Z")
Divorce me. Take half my money.