# Wildly unsuitable songs for striptease acts. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 15, 2004, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608 "2004-01-15T17:30:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/61 "2004-01-16T03:32:39Z")
C’mon. “Inna Gadda Da Vida” by Iron Butterfly. Seventeen minutes and one totally naked, totally exhausted stripper later … “Pencil Neck Geeks” by Fred Blassie (tho Dr. Demento tunes are kind of a cheat). “1983, A Merman I Should Turn To Be” by Jimi Hendrix ---
**Author:** ![E.Thorp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@E.Thorp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E.Thorp)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/62 "2004-01-16T03:42:23Z")
“If I Had $1000000” On the plus side, it’s by Barenaked Ladies. ---
**Author:** ![Sarcastic\_Fringehead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/919ad9/32.png) [@Sarcastic\_Fringehead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarcastic_Fringehead)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/63 "2004-01-16T03:49:00Z")
I Think About You - Collin Raye Sample lyrics: when I see a pretty woman walkin’ down the street I think about you men look her up and down like she’s some kind of treat I think about you she doesn’t dare talk to a stranger always has to be aware of the danger oh when I look at this world I think about you I think about you eight years old blue blue eyes and a heart of gold when I look at this world I see every woman used to be somebody’s little girl I think about you ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/64 "2004-01-16T04:03:19Z")
Man, I didn’t the thread would make it this far without someone mentioning “Lola”, by the Kinks. One would think that “Smack My Bitch Up” would be wildly inappropriate, yet dancers at one club I know of actually ask the DJ to play it. I’m having real trouble thinking of any Beatles songs that would sound right for a stripper to dance to, but can imagine a bunch of Stones songs without half trying. Says something, I guess, but I’m not sure what. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/65 "2004-01-16T04:27:34Z")
> [@DaveX](#): > > I don’t know if **Isla** has spent much time in strip clubs, but Pantera seems to be a staple… at least around my neck of the woods. > > And **Guinistasia** beat me to it. Except that I actually saw a stripper perform to ‘Butterfly Kisses’ once. It was as awful and awkward as you would expect… No freaking way. That’s just…ew!!! Speaking of _Star Wars_, what about “The Imperial March” or “Duel of the Fates”? Or better yet, the original celebration song from _Return of the Jedi_, with the Ewoks? What about “Roll Out the Barrel”, or any other polka? Complete with accordions! ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/66 "2004-01-16T05:22:00Z")
Anaal Nathrakh’s “Pandemonic Hyperblast”. It’s about 400 bpm and features vocals that sound like a man being tortured. It just wouldn’t work. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/67 "2004-01-16T06:59:23Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > The **1812 Overture**! > > DA-DADA-DADA-DA-DA-DA **BOOM!** Well, I did see this stripper once who could shoot ping-pong balls across the room… And to combine two of **Guin** ’s suggestions, here’s a performance I actually witnessed. This was at a rather seedy place in Tokyo, so I guess neither the dancer nor the audience ('cept me) knew what the lyrics really were: An extremely raunchy dance and simulated sex performed to… _This Here Anakin Guy_, Weird Al Yankovic’s parody of “American Pie”. An extremely attractive young woman fellating another dancer’s strap-on to the beat of “soon I’m gonna be a Jedi…” It was a sight to behold. And the very next act? _Butterfly Kisses_. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/68 "2004-01-16T08:44:29Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > Man, I didn’t the thread would make it this far without someone mentioning “Lola”, by the Kinks. Someone mentioned that on page 1. My picks: “Love Is A Fist” - Mr. Bungle “My Ass Is On Fire” - Mr. Bungle “Egg” - Mr. Bungle Hell, lots of things by Mr. Bungle. “Like Suicide” - Soundgarden “Whitey Ford Sings The Blues” - Everlast “Working In A Coal Mine” - Devo “Institutionalized” - Suicidal Tendencies ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 8:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/69 "2004-01-16T08:51:24Z")
> [@photopat](#): > > Beethoven’s **Fifth Symphony** I’d like to see that one, actually. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Sparky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Saint\_Sparky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Sparky)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 8:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/70 "2004-01-16T08:53:36Z")
I am suprised nobody has said: “Like A Virgin” That was the first one to pop in my mind. ---
**Author:** ![Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bc8723/32.png) [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 8:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/71 "2004-01-16T08:56:38Z")
The first one to pop into my mind is the not-subtle song about STDs: AC/DC’s “The Jack.” Ewww. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/72 "2004-01-16T14:28:08Z")
Anything by Neil Young, Especially his acoustic stuff. I like him in general, but that voice is NOT sexy. The way he whines - okay, he’s almost always whiney, but when he’s not rocking, it’s worse - not a turn on. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/73 "2004-01-16T14:28:33Z")
> [@Evil Captor](#): > > C’mon. “Inna Gadda Da Vida” by Iron Butterfly. Seventeen minutes and one totally naked, totally exhausted stripper later … You do it tag-team, with the entire staff of the strip joint… ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/74 "2004-01-16T14:29:58Z")
Or how about The Mickey Mouse Club song? ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/75 "2004-01-16T14:52:32Z")
heh, this thread is too funny _we’re only making plans for nigel_ by XTC _theme to the Alexei Sayle show_ - its the same as the Mickey Mouse one, but ALE-XEI SAYLE _Pyramid Song_ by Radiohead, simply because i’d enjoy anybody trying to dance to that _Babe, i’m on fire_ by Nick Cave:14mins46secs! _Little Trouble Girl_ by Sonic Youth Back in the real world, apparently _Closer_ by NIN is the most danced to strip song ever. ---
**Author:** ![oAMADEUSo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bc8723/32.png) [@oAMADEUSo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oAMADEUSo)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/76 "2004-01-16T14:52:45Z")
The music from the trippy bit in 2001 Teletubbies theme Patrick Moore doing a cover of “smack by bitch up” on the xylophone ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/77 "2004-01-16T15:17:14Z")
> [@Interrobang!?](#): > > He wants a shoehorn! _twirl!_ > The kind with teeth! _boom-ka-boom_ > People should get beat up _shimmmmmmy_ > For stating their beliefs. _and there goes the bra!_ Stop it! Stop it! Oh, that hurts! :eek: I think I just ruptured something. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/78 "2004-01-16T15:36:35Z")
John Cage’s **4’33"** ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/79 "2004-01-16T15:49:33Z")
> [@](#): > > Someone mentioned that (“Lola”) on page 1. Crap, you’re right. Ok, scratch Lola. How about: “Somewhere over the Rainbow” Yes, “Roundabout” Talking Heads, “Road to Nowhere” Johnny Cash, “Boy Named Sue” ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608/80 "2004-01-16T15:53:31Z")
_Requiem for a Dream_ soundtrack _3 days_ by Janes Addiction and the cherry on the bun, _Me and Mrs Jones_ by Billy Paul MEEEEEEEEEEE-AN-MRS JOOOOOONESMRSJONESMRSJONESMRSJONES [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wildly-unsuitable-songs-for-striptease-acts/224608.md?page=5)