# Wishing is Dangerous! (aka Oh, Shit!) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 17, 2008, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460 "2008-10-17T22:41:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2008, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/1 "2008-10-17T22:41:14Z")
Well, this time it’s not my father in the hospital. It’s my mother. And it’s very bad. She’s had a stopped heart for at least three minutes this morning, and is suffering from not a true infarction, but a condition where part of the heart seems to have stopped beating, and responding to the SA node. The good news is that a patient that survives while this is happening can usually recover. The bad news is that my mom has a whole lot of other problems going on. Biggest is that her lungs are filling with fluid, and she hasn’t been exchanging gases at all well. She’s on a respirator, and at one point they had to run it past the normal max. There have been some incremental improvements since then, but it’s slow, and we’re very much in a waiting game, now. As for the title… I’ve begun working on doing something about my health. I have made a goal, recently, to make sure that I outlive my parents. Be careful what you wish for. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2008, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/2 "2008-10-17T22:47:24Z")
On the other hand… I just got the best news of the day: My mom just woke up in the ICU, and is moving all her limbs, and communicating with nods and gestures. ---
**Author:** ![freekalette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/50afbb/32.png) [@freekalette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freekalette)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2008, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/3 "2008-10-17T22:51:05Z")
So sorry to hear your mother is unwell. You’ll be in my thoughts. Hang in there! _hugs_ ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2008, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/4 "2008-10-17T22:55:44Z")
Best wishes to your family, **OtakuLoki**. And put down the damn Monkey’s Paw. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2008, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/5 "2008-10-17T22:58:58Z")
Good luck to your mom, **OtakuLoki**. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/6 "2008-10-18T02:38:25Z")
Thanks to everyone’s kind wishes. Kinda forgot to start with that. I really appreciate hearing them. Well, more good news. My mother managed to communicate the need for a bowel movement. And then got upset and embarassed when the nurses promised her a bed pan. I doubt she realizes she’s in ICU. Nor how close it is for her. And thinking healthy can do a lot to help a body be healthy. ---
**Author:** ![Euryphaessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Euryphaessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euryphaessa)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/7 "2008-10-18T03:10:01Z")
Yikes, that’s gotta be scary. I hope everything turns out well. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/8 "2008-10-18T04:12:53Z")
Best of luck to you and yours. I hope the “good news” keeps coming! ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/9 "2008-10-18T06:33:02Z")
Thinking well wishes for you both {{{ **Otaku** }}}. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/10 "2008-10-18T06:48:17Z")
You probably never seriously thought this, but just in case you did, it’s not your fault what happened. I’m glad to hear your mom is doing better. ---
**Author:** ![meenie7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7993a0/32.png) [@meenie7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meenie7)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 7:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/11 "2008-10-18T07:33:49Z")
Yikes! Best wishes to you and your mom…I know how tense it is in those initial hours and days, waiting to see if they’re going to make it through, and how those little bits of news can make or break you. I hope the good news keeps coming, just like it did for me with my dad, and that your mom comes home and pulls through it like my dad did. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/12 "2008-10-18T07:34:36Z")
Very best wishes. ---
**Author:** ![jtsPimp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@jtsPimp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtsPimp)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/13 "2008-10-18T07:47:06Z")
good luck man ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/14 "2008-10-18T14:43:32Z")
Heavenly day! Sorry to hear it, Otakuloki. Keep us posted! ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/15 "2008-10-18T16:10:11Z")
Again, thanks to everyone who has passed on their good wishes. They are much appreciated. She’s made it through the night. There are still problems, including some bile that had to be removed. (I’m not sure from where, though.) And the ICU personnel are not thrilled with mom’s bowel movements. But they’re talking about taking her off the respirator and letting her breathe on her own. So that’s an improvement. But it’s not clear how things will turn out. We’re still very much up in the air. Still, compared to the gut punch of being told she had to have CPR, and that they had still been having trouble keeping her blood oxygenated, I’ll welcome these complications. She’s still alive. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/16 "2008-10-18T17:15:23Z")
> [@OtakuLoki](#): > > I doubt she realizes she’s in ICU. Nor how close it is for her. I was in hospital recently, with something much less serious then your mom has, and even I got a little disoriented, and (I can now admit it) a bit petulant. Little things, like going to the bathroom the way I wanted to go, mean a lot when I felt my dignity and autonomy was at stake. Sending good thoughts for you and your mom! ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/17 "2008-10-18T18:47:01Z")
Thank goodness! ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/18 "2008-10-18T19:27:25Z")
> [@Maastricht](#): > > I was in hospital recently, with something much less serious then your mom has, and even I got a little disoriented, and (I can now admit it) a bit petulant. Little things, like going to the bathroom the way I wanted to go, mean a lot when I felt my dignity and autonomy was at stake. I understand just what you mean. I don’t blame anyone for not wanting to use a bedpan. Sometimes you have to accept it. And it’s still heartening that my mom doesn’t she had to accept it. Well, off to see her today, and taking my father too. I’ll check in again later tonight. Thank you all again for your good thoughts. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/19 "2008-10-18T19:30:53Z")
> [@OtakuLoki](#): > > She’s made it through the night. There are still problems, including some bile that had to be removed. (I’m not sure from where, though.) And the ICU personnel are not thrilled with mom’s bowel movements. What does this mean? If the staff have shown or expressed any displeasure in helping her with this, they need to be reported. :mad: The bile may have been removed using a nasogastic tube. I am not sure why they would need to remove bile at this point, but NG tubes are often placed when a patient is on the ventilator. If they get her off the vent quickly, and she can stay off it, she will resume normal eating (after the NG tube is removed). I’m not altogether sure that she has an NG tube, but it seems most likely, given what you’ve shared here. > [@](#): > > But they’re talking about taking her off the respirator and letting her breathe on her own. So that’s an improvement. But it’s not clear how things will turn out. We’re still very much up in the air. > > Still, compared to the gut punch of being told she had to have CPR, and that they had still been having trouble keeping her blood oxygenated, I’ll welcome these complications. She’s still alive. She has a long way to go, but has come a long way. I hope her recovery remains smooth. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2008, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460/20 "2008-10-18T22:57:52Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > What does this mean? If the staff have shown or expressed any displeasure in helping her with this, they need to be reported. :mad: Whoa! I’d meant that they were concerned by the condition of her bowel movement - and what that might indicate about her health. AFAIK no one at the hospital has been anything other than helpful and professional. > [@](#): > > The bile may have been removed using a nasogastic tube. I am not sure why they would need to remove bile at this point, but NG tubes are often placed when a patient is on the ventilator. If they get her off the vent quickly, and she can stay off it, she will resume normal eating (after the NG tube is removed). I’m not altogether sure that she has an NG tube, but it seems most likely, given what you’ve shared here. Yeah, she’s on an NG tube. Right now they’re reducing the “peep,” and seeing how that affects her oxygen levels. I’ve seen her now, and compared to when I saw her passed out yesterday, seeing her grumpy, and frustrated with my inability to read her notes, is a huge improvement. She’s not looking “good.” But when my sister came out after seeing her the other night, saying that she looked awful, I had a very different image. Movement is lovely. Purposeful movement even more so. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wishing-is-dangerous-aka-oh-shit/468460.md?page=2)