# Witness haters--are you happy now? :( **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 2, 2013, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221 "2013-10-02T23:02:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 34
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/661 "2013-12-27T03:22:24Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Keeping it seasonal, I hereby invoke the forces of Santa. I’m working with Santana, the hours are much better and so is the music. ---
**Author:** ![LavenderBlue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e95f7d/32.png) [@LavenderBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LavenderBlue)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/662 "2013-12-27T03:32:43Z")
If Satan isn’t knocking on my door while I’m trying to change a baby or making lunch, I’ll take Satan over a JW any day of the week. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/663 "2013-12-27T03:38:24Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > I’m working with Santana, the hours are much better and so is the music. I am sucking up to the forces of Santa Anna, because he’s a snazzy dresser. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/664 "2013-12-27T06:47:25Z")
Do you mean the Mexican general? I read once that his own people were going to make a burrito out of him! :eek: Santana? I’d prefer him, too. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/665 "2013-12-27T07:13:53Z")
We had JW’s at the door this morning! It’s been quite a while for us. It was a young woman, older woman and a little girl around 8 yrs old. She was adorable. When the lady asked if I knew what it says in the Bible about Christ’s return, I replied that I did as I have read the whole Bible more than once. The little girl looked at me like I was a rockstar, “Really? oh wow! you are super, super, super, super, super, super, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious cool!” I thought she was going hug me. Anyway, then I said I had to go and they politely left. I did briefly consider kidnapping the little girl. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/666 "2013-12-27T07:29:25Z")
> [@peterhedstrom](#): > > Have it known that when you persecute any of God’s people you are attracting the forces of satan whom are very pleased at seeing a mostly balanced person doing hateful deeds. That’s probably a more effective threat against people who _believe_ in Satan, you know. As it is, that idiot who started shooting at people is facing the legal penalties for doing so; which are a lot more likely to have an effect than your religion’s bogeyman will. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/667 "2013-12-27T07:57:15Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > Do you mean the Mexican general? I read once that his own people were going to make a burrito out of him! :eek: Santana? I’d prefer him, too. 🙂 Why do you even post on this board? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/668 "2013-12-27T16:02:37Z")
Say what you want about Jehovah Witnesses , but they are fuck all as nuisances compared to the constant (almost daily) harassment I get from telephone solicitors, especially Google, the worst of all. Very often I have to responded to a fucking machine ! Responding to a door bell maybe once a year to politely decline a conversation is no reason at all to get your panties in a twist. ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/669 "2013-12-27T16:23:16Z")
> [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](#): > > Say what you want about Jehovah Witnesses , but they are fuck all as nuisances compared to the constant (almost daily) harassment I get from telephone solicitors, especially Google, the worst of all. Very often I have to responded to a fucking machine ! > > Responding to a door bell maybe once a year to politely decline a conversation is no reason at all to get your panties in a twist. 1. Do Not Call list. 2. You can change your number much more easily than your address. 3. Telemarketing doesn’t stop you from blood transfusions or tell you that you’re going to hell. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/670 "2013-12-27T16:40:29Z")
> [@stpauler](#): > > 1. Do Not Call list. > > 2. You can change your number much more easily than your address. > > 3. Telemarketing doesn’t stop you from blood transfusions or tell you that you’re going to hell. 1. I’ve e-mailed the Do not call list several times with 0 results. Its a joke. 1. Are you joking . 3.Telemarketing’s purpose is to separate you from your money. In some cases for those of feeble mind, it can destroy them financially. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/671 "2013-12-27T16:46:14Z")
You get phone calls from Google? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/672 "2013-12-27T16:50:45Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > You get phone calls from Google? Makes me feel unimportant; they wait till I initiate a search.☹ ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/673 "2013-12-27T16:53:19Z")
> [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](#): > > 1. I’ve e-mailed the Do not call list several times with 0 results. Its a joke. > > 1. Are you joking . > > 3.Telemarketing’s purpose is to separate you from your money. In some cases for those of feeble mind, it can destroy them financially. Am I joking about changing your number being easier than changing your address? No. I must be mistaken then. Changing your phone number is an insurmountable task that by the grace of all that is holy could never be accomplished by a mere mortal. Stupid me. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/674 "2013-12-27T17:16:16Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > You get phone calls from Google? They want to sell me a web page and business listing. > [@stpauler](#): > > Am I joking about changing your number being easier than changing your address? No. I must be mistaken then. Changing your phone number is an insurmountable task that by the grace of all that is holy could never be accomplished by a mere mortal. Stupid me. Changing my phone number and reeducating my clients and prospective clients as to my new phone numbers so that THEY can find me is stupid, stupid and more stupid. And no, I’m not about to hire a telephone marketing firm to send out robo calls to inform the public as to my new phone number. ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/675 "2013-12-27T17:27:38Z")
> [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](#): > > Changing my phone number and reeducating my clients and prospective clients as to my new phone numbers so that THEY can find me is stupid, stupid and more stupid. And no, I’m not about to hire a telephone marketing firm to send out robo calls to inform the public as to my new phone number. [Good thing that that’s not the only solution too.](http://shop.centurylink.com/residential/pdf/user_guides/english/NoSolicitation_en.pdf) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/676 "2013-12-27T17:47:27Z")
> [@stpauler](#): > > [Good thing that that’s not the only solution too.](http://shop.centurylink.com/residential/pdf/user_guides/english/NoSolicitation_en.pdf) Thanx, I’m considering this option. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2014, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/677 "2014-07-01T07:41:25Z")
_Originally Posted by andros_ \<\\> **[Link to _Leck\_mich\_im\_Arsch_ in Wikipedia]** Only at this late date have I been able to follow that link to Wikipedia. I guess I should _expect_ this from your ilk. All I can say is: I bet your mother had a loud bark! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2014, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/678 "2014-07-01T07:55:40Z")
All hail Pharrell Amenhotep! ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2014, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/679 "2014-07-01T08:15:27Z")
Say what? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2014, 9:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/680 "2014-07-01T09:29:32Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > _Originally Posted by andros_ > > \<\\> **[Link to _Leck\_mich\_im\_Arsch_ in Wikipedia]** > > Only at this late date have I been able to follow that link to Wikipedia. I guess I should _expect_ this from your ilk. All I can say is: I bet your mother had a loud bark! :mad: _sniff . . .sniff_ I smell a bitchfight brewing… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221.md?page=33) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221.md?page=35)