# Witness haters--are you happy now? :( **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 2, 2013, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221 "2013-10-02T23:02:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 40
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2014, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/781 "2014-07-03T23:12:28Z")
> [@Canadjun](#): > > Well there’s only so much you can do with an IBM PC with 640K of memory. “640K is more memory than anyone will ever need on a computer” said Bill Gates, never. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/782 "2014-07-04T02:47:32Z")
> [@Euphonious\_Polemic](#): > > A modem? > > MODEM? Your fucking MODEM is blocked? > > It’s a wonder that your papyrus has not suffered an outage. As of Feb 2013, [AOL still sold over $600 million worth of dial-up internet per year](http://dottech.org/96601/aol-still-sells-over-600-million-worth-of-slow-dial-up-internet-per-year/) ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/783 "2014-07-04T02:53:31Z")
> [@Euphonious\_Polemic](#): > > A modem? > > MODEM? Your fucking MODEM is blocked? > > It’s a wonder that your papyrus has not suffered an outage. Obviously, **d\_m** doesn’t know that bytes can pile up in old wires. Just a quick shot of 440v will clear out the blockage. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/784 "2014-07-04T04:22:05Z")
Ya know who _really_ hates witnesses? Hit and run drivers. /on topic ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/785 "2014-07-04T04:35:40Z")
Just a side note - we have cable and we have a modem. At work we sell both cable and dsl modems. That’s what they are called. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/786 "2014-07-04T05:17:35Z")
Is this “libel” in the way that making fun of people whose books are sold in health stores is “libel”? ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/787 "2014-07-04T07:19:38Z")
> [@Canadjun](#): > > Well there’s only so much you can do with an IBM PC with 640K of memory. Now that shows how much you know. I have a Dell Inspiron 570 with 2 gb memory. I have dial-up because I’m not the one who pays the bills here, and I don’t have the authority to have lines run through the walls. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/788 "2014-07-04T09:03:00Z")
I had DSL Extreme added a few years ago. They piggybacked it onto the outside junction box where the phone line enters our apartment, and gave me a DSL modem and enough line filters to place one on each extension jack. The service can be obtained for as low as $15/mo, IIRC, and looks to be available in your area. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/789 "2014-07-04T12:48:50Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > I don’t have the authority to have lines run through the walls. [QUOTE=Dalai Lama] The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual’s own reason and critical analysis. [/QUOTE] … ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/790 "2014-07-04T14:27:45Z")
Well, when the Dalai Lama pays the bills here, he can make the rules. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/791 "2014-07-04T14:32:21Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Is this “libel” in the way that making fun of people whose books are sold in health stores is “libel”? No, “making fun” is one thing. Being denied identity is another! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/792 "2014-07-04T15:07:02Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > Well, when the Dalai Lama pays the bills here, he can make the rules. [QUOTE=Dalai Lama] Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. [/QUOTE] … ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/793 "2014-07-04T17:40:28Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > No, “making fun” is one thing. Being denied identity is another! Perhaps you could explain what the ever-loving fuck you’re talking about for once? ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/794 "2014-07-04T18:17:03Z")
> [@raventhief](#): > > Just a side note - we have cable and we have a modem. At work we sell both cable and dsl modems. That’s what they are called. How do you block them? Stuff chewing gum in the line in slot? ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/795 "2014-07-04T18:20:16Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > How do you block them? Stuff chewing gum in the line in slot? Ummm. That I don’t know. Maybe smack one really hard with a block of wood? ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/796 "2014-07-04T20:10:04Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Perhaps you could explain what the ever-loving fuck you’re talking about for once? :Sigh: The Wikipedia administration declared me a “sock puppet” (false identity) and barred me from editing. THAT is libel! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/797 "2014-07-04T20:18:42Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > How do you block them? Stuff chewing gum in the line in slot? According to AOL, the “initialization” of the modem could not be effected. That’s all I know. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Wino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@The\_Wino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Wino)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/798 "2014-07-04T21:26:44Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > :Sigh: The Wikipedia administration declared me a “sock puppet” (false identity) and barred me from editing. THAT is libel! :mad: No it isn’t. It’s a minor inconvenience at worst. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/799 "2014-07-04T21:26:54Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > :Sigh: The Wikipedia administration declared me a “sock puppet” (false identity) and barred me from editing. THAT is libel! :mad: Or a mistake. Not everything is a grave offense. ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2014, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221/800 "2014-07-04T21:50:05Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > :Sigh: The Wikipedia administration declared me a “sock puppet” (false identity) and barred me from editing. THAT is libel! :mad: Not even close. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221.md?page=39) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness-haters-are-you-happy-now/670221.md?page=41)