# "Witness" **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [August 26, 2000, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801 "2000-08-26T04:03:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Cardinal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardinal/32/4000_2.png) [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/1 "2000-08-26T04:03:03Z")
Statement that poster is a Christian. Disavowal of intention to start an argument. Statement of faith. Ad hominim attack on previous thread that discussed religion. Vague argument that Christianity is true, with several incomplete thoughts. Several scripture quotes. Interpretation of quotes. Vociferous attack on concept of evolution. Several misstatements about current theories of the evolutionary process. Off-hand reference to Newton’s third law. Freudian slip revealing frustration with SDMB threads that cause poster to have to examine faith critically. Further frustrated comments about non-Christians only having themselves to blame for their condition. Threatening statements having to do with hell. Hint that the world is going down the toilet ever since mandated prayer was taken out of schools. Example of how world is sliding. Name-calling attack on gays. Assumptions about emotional states of post readers. Personal testimony, consisting of three long paragraphs. Appeal to non-Christians on board to just leave the Christians alone. Complete gospel message. Appeal to non-Christians to convert. Signature line taken from Descarte proving the existance of God. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/2 "2000-08-26T04:10:53Z")
Moderator comes and places admittedly witty post in the forum it belongs - MPSIMS. * * * friendly sign off, Username [sub]Meter indicating how long poster has not smoked, and the money and extra life accrued in kind[/sub] **_Quotation humorously and intentionally taken out of coontext_-Posters Fiancee’s Name** [sub]Amusing Subtext about Quotation\*[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/3 "2000-08-26T04:11:24Z")
Declaration of exasperation due to yet another such post. Perfectly reasoned and often asked yet never satisfactorily answered question regarding logical inconsistencies of Christianity. Suggestion that the original poster visit the talk.origins archive. signature ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/4 "2000-08-26T14:14:16Z")
> [@](#): > > Perfectly reasoned and often asked yet never satisfactorily answered question regarding logical inconsistencies of Christianity. Roll eyes smiley. Detailed and formal deduction, including list of undefined terms, definitions, axioms, premises, and conclusion. Dispassionate summary. Four hundredth explanation of epistemology and metaphysical context. ---
**Author:** ![xenophon41](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xenophon41/32/253_2.png) [@xenophon41](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xenophon41)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/5 "2000-08-26T14:40:10Z")
> [@](#): > > - > > Roll eyes smiley. > > Detailed and formal deduction, including list of undefined terms, definitions, axioms, premises, and conclusion. Dispassionate summary. > > Four hundredth explanation of epistemology and metaphysical context. \* Exasperated semihijack pointing out that epistemological discussions are interesting yet have no bearing in the context of a rational examination of religious dogma. Partially supported assertion that reason is the implied epistemology of GDenizens. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/6 "2000-08-26T14:48:08Z")
Debateless. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/7 "2000-08-26T14:51:20Z")
Trite retelling of Pascal’s Wager. Statement about mankind’s creation. Mention of how science believes that man evolved from apes. Insinuation that evolution is just a theory. Link to web page with a long treatise about the depth of moon dust. Invitation to come and discuss this further at the LBMB. ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/8 "2000-08-26T15:00:39Z")
Is this really necessary: > [@](#): > > Ad hominim attack on previous thread that discussed religion. Vague argument that Christianity is true, with several incomplete thoughts. Remark about ad hominem attacks being antithetical to the tenets of Christianity. > [@](#): > > Signature line taken from Descarte proving the existance of God Irrelevant question about the life of Descartes. (: ---
**Author:** ![hawthorne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@hawthorne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hawthorne)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/9 "2000-08-26T15:57:46Z")
Notes mis-spelling of “witless” in thread title. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/10 "2000-08-26T16:39:28Z")
Promise by originator of post to respond to all the fine points made by contributors thus far but first the originator of thread must floss cat, look in on friend suddenly stricken ill, help a stray dog deliver puppies in back yard, trim elderly neighbour’s trees. \ Returns to thread, thanks the SDMB members for thoughtfull responses. Pounces on the most trivial point available and then disappears once more, to return when his cup once more runneth over with selfrightuousness of latest inspirational sermon. ---
**Author:** ![Trout\_Mask\_Replica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e57/32.png) [@Trout\_Mask\_Replica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trout_Mask_Replica)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/11 "2000-08-26T18:38:09Z")
> [@](#): > > **Trite retelling of Pascal’s Wager.** Explanation of flawed reasoning behind Pascal’s Wager. > [@](#): > > **Statement about mankind’s creation.** Invitation to back up said statement with facts. > [@](#): > > **Mention of how science believes that man evolved from apes.** Brief discussion of why this is a misconception. Link to relevant FAQ at talk.origins website. > [@](#): > > **Insinuation that evolution is just a theory.** Explanation of the relationship between fact, theory, and law. > [@](#): > > **Link to web page with a long treatise about the depth of moon dust.** Link to rebuttal to above page. * * * Obscure MST3K quote. ---
**Author:** ![jmullaney](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/85e7bf/32.png) [@jmullaney](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jmullaney)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/12 "2000-08-26T19:05:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DoctorJ \* > Perfectly reasoned and often asked yet never satisfactorily answered question regarding logical inconsistencies of Christianity. Explains inconsistenceies are imaginary or unimportant to reality of faith. Disclaimer about not being a Christian. Unintentional but required flame that poster of OP does not represent mainstream Christian beliefs. ---
**Author:** ![Hunsecker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/d78d45/32.png) [@Hunsecker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hunsecker)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/13 "2000-08-26T19:33:36Z")
Lurking (oh wait… damn!) Privately questioning why lurker keeps reading threads like this, when lurker could have more fun lurking on LBMB and maybe wouldn’t it be better if lurker would get some sleep. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/14 "2000-08-26T19:41:48Z")
Pithy, yet terse, and insultingly veiled reply showing annoyance for the perception of intolerance. Terse smackdown from moderator for aforementioned reply. ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/15 "2000-08-26T20:30:34Z")
Releases jar of butterflies. Enjoins those posting the intent of divinity that they lack authority. Cautions all that personal opinions on theological matters are not binding upon deity. Proposes that love is a good thing, whether holy or profane. Questions the logical nature of faith, and the subsequent futility of examining it with such tools. Abbrev Self referential comment from near ancestor Attribution of same. ---
**Author:** ![Cardinal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardinal/32/4000_2.png) [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2000, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/16 "2000-08-26T21:10:27Z")
Hurt reply. Indication that OP is frustrated with other posters just not getting it. Hint that tears may have been involved in typing of reply. Story about mean high school biology teacher and arguments OP had with him about evolution. Quote from Steven Jay Gould in attempt at credibility. Reference to Stephen Hawking. Comment that it’s just not worth sticking around here and throwing pearls before swine. Reference to purses and pigs’ ears. ---
**Author:** ![Tzel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Tzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzel)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2000, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/17 "2000-08-27T17:48:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Trout Mask Replica \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > **Trite retelling of Pascal’s Wager.** > > Explanation of flawed reasoning behind Pascal’s Wager. > > > [@](#): > > > > **Statement about mankind’s creation.** > > Invitation to back up said statement with facts. Link to creationist site so predictably illogical it is only capable of preaching to the converted. > [@](#): > > **Mention of how science believes that man evolved from apes.** Brief discussion of why this is a misconception. Link to relevant FAQ at talk.origins website. > [@](#): > > **Insinuation that evolution is just a theory.** Explanation of the relationship between fact, theory, and law. > [@](#): > > **Link to web page with a long treatise about the depth of moon dust.** Link to rebuttal to above page. [/quote] [tone of voice]Comment about how all of the rebuttals are by evolutionists and therefore obviously biased.[/tone of voice] Assertion that the truth will only be revealed after you believe, so non-Christians are actually deceived and unable to understand the airtight logic of Christianity. Book of the Bible chapter:verse “Bible Quote” ---
**Author:** ![Tzel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Tzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzel)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2000, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/18 "2000-08-27T17:50:12Z")
Apology for badly formed link in previous post. Fixed [url=http://www.icr.org]link. Smiley face indicating good natured embarassment at said mistake. ---
**Author:** ![Tzel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Tzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzel)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2000, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/19 "2000-08-27T17:51:16Z")
Poster never learns to use Preview Reply button. ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2000, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801/20 "2000-08-27T18:34:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Triskadecamus \* > \*\*Releases jar of butterflies. > \*\* Hit and run post blaming **Tris** and all his damn butterflies for the thunderstorm we got. Winkie smilie. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/witness/30801.md?page=2)