# Woman behold thy daughter, daughter thy mother, & BOTH OF YOU LOSE MY NUMBER! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 21, 2005, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427 "2005-07-21T04:15:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/141 "2005-07-22T19:50:18Z")
Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap… ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/142 "2005-07-22T19:54:35Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap… Ditto!!! ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/143 "2005-07-22T19:56:44Z")
_Applause._ That’s just all there is to say. ---
**Author:** ![brownie55](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f14d63/32.png) [@brownie55](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brownie55)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/144 "2005-07-22T20:03:41Z")
Were is the bow down toward **Sampiro** chanting “We’re not worthy” icon? ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/145 "2005-07-22T20:05:29Z")
> [@](#): > > This is a reference to the early 1990s, when my mother and I shared a 1 BR apartment that we jointly managed for recently released mental patients. (That’s some interesting stories- everything from a sacrifice to Elvis to a guy keeping his eyes propped open with toothpicks so he wouldn’t fall asleep and miss one of the messages God was sending him through the plumbing [both 100% unembellished events and both far from the worst or even strangest day there.) and > [@](#): > > (along with whatever apparitions she has- she swears her house, or that she herself, is haunted- now I believe that of two other places we’ve lived, but I think now it’s more wishful thinking on her part as she always felt special when she had a ghost in the house. Now you’re just being cruel. It’s not fair to dangle the carrot just out of reach. After awhile the mule is going to kick you until you give it to him. Bravo, and thank you for a most entertaining trip through your life. I want more. ---
**Author:** ![Orual](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/779978/32.png) [@Orual](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orual)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/146 "2005-07-22T20:12:54Z")
_Encore! Encore!_ ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/147 "2005-07-22T20:13:26Z")
Cube farms all over the world look like prairie dog villages as all Dopers rise for a standing ovation. ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/148 "2005-07-22T20:31:02Z")
Huzzah!!! So, is it wrong to wish for another hurricane to come a’roaring toward Mobile? I think we need a part deux. ---
**Author:** ![AThingWithFeathers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@AThingWithFeathers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AThingWithFeathers)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/149 "2005-07-22T20:36:42Z")
**Ivylass** is right. It’s inhumane to taunt us like that! I laughed so much my bronchitus started acting us. ( :dubious: I think it’s sympathetic to yours, because I thought I’d gotten rid of that.) I’m cheering for a book deal. Mental patients? Sacrifices to Elvis? (I’ve never tried that, so I’m somewhat inruiged.) How do you hold your eyes open with toothpicks anyway? Dish! Please? You’ve already got a fanclub. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Violaceous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Miss\_Violaceous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Violaceous)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/150 "2005-07-22T20:44:42Z")
Bravo. I’m dying to hear “outed” and about the haunted houses. And the fake ouija board messages. I think we need a poll for this. ---
**Author:** ![FisherQueen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@FisherQueen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FisherQueen)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/151 "2005-07-22T20:49:03Z")
If you do decide to write a book, make sure you come back here to post the story of what happened when your mother and your sister read it. You know, you could send them to a link to this thread, and we’d probably get another funny story out of it. Go on, I dare you! ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/152 "2005-07-22T20:50:30Z")
I think I love you. Well, I mean, in that it’d never work - me being female (and married!) and you being gay, but I still love you. Or at least I might after my ribs stop hurting from laughing so hard. ---
**Author:** ![Canadiangirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Canadiangirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadiangirl)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/153 "2005-07-22T20:51:22Z")
messages god was sending through the plumbing is probably the funniest thing I’ve heard for years… Bravo! This is my first Sampiro story but it sure as hell won’t be my last!!! I’m checking in every day 'til the next one…'cause you gotta know,there IS going to be a next one! ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/154 "2005-07-22T20:56:20Z")
“.38 caliber tranquilizer” has now entered my vocabulary. ---
**Author:** ![Susie\_Derkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Susie\_Derkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susie_Derkins)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/155 "2005-07-22T20:56:22Z")
Loved it, loved it, _loved it_!! Oh, and Pall Malls and Red Dogs? I swear we’re kin. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Goob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c77e96/32.png) [@Mr.Goob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Goob)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/156 "2005-07-22T21:02:25Z")
I stayed almost 45 minutes late at work on a beautiful Friday afternoon to finish this. Well done. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/157 "2005-07-22T21:44:09Z")
Wonderfully told as always **Sampiro**. I have guests due in about 45 minutes and I can now mentally prepare myself for a dinner party for 12, having read the conclusion. I would have been wanting to throw em out after they ate just so I could get back here and read. My guests are greatful (though they don’t know it) I had the opportunity to read the conclusion before they arrived. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/158 "2005-07-22T21:50:15Z")
You know, **swampbear** if you’re fast enough, you could print out the whold thread, highlight the posts with the story, and regale your guests with it. Be the social event of the season, I betcha. ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/159 "2005-07-22T21:53:07Z")
:: bows before greatness :: “We’re not worthy!!!” That was fabulous, dahlin’. The funniest thing (beside your story) is that I have been reading _Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood._ So many similarities! Must have something to do with the humidity of the Gulf… Please regale us with more tales from the Southern side… ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427/160 "2005-07-22T22:23:48Z")
> [@Ogre](#): > > I’m hoping **Sampiro** is going to show up at our engagement party this weekend in Montgomery. You’re in the same state as **Sampiro**? Go over to his house and make him sit down at the computer to tell us more stories. Threaten him with a pecan log from Stuckey’s if you have to. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-behold-thy-daughter-daughter-thy-mother-both-of-you-lose-my-number/313427.md?page=9)