# Woman microwaves baby **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 14, 2011, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062 "2011-07-14T21:50:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/41 "2011-07-15T15:30:57Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > You wouldnt be making these jokes if she had raped herself then climbed in the micowave. Just sayin. That would have to be one big-ass microwave. ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/42 "2011-07-15T15:35:38Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > That would have to be one big-ass microwave. What does her big ass have to do with anything? Whats your problem with fat people? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/43 "2011-07-15T15:41:09Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > Is it just me or does that woman have a GIGANTIC forehead? Yep, more of a fivehead. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/44 "2011-07-15T16:06:45Z")
> [@Soliloquy](#): > > She’s pregnant again, of course. Or as Fark put it, she’s got another one in the oven. ---
**Author:** ![JBDivmstr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@JBDivmstr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBDivmstr)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/45 "2011-07-15T22:21:15Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > Or as Fark put it, she’s got another one in the oven. Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha… snort… sputter… choke… gasp… wheeze!!!😃 ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/46 "2011-07-15T23:01:34Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > It was an Asian baby. Hello, people, stir fry? Oh wow, I hadn’t even bothered reading the article on this one. The penis-chopping wife was also Asian. Maybe this is the beginning of a coordinated attack - first a penis, then an infant. What’s next? ---
**Author:** ![Soliloquy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@Soliloquy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soliloquy)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/47 "2011-07-15T23:20:00Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > Oh wow, I hadn’t even bothered reading the article on this one. The penis-chopping wife was also Asian. Maybe this is the beginning of a coordinated attack - first a penis, then an infant. What’s next? You’re suggesting a coordinated attack. Does that mean that the bad driving could be less coincidence and more part of the plan to remove other people from existence one fender-bender at a time? Whip lash is hell on procreating, I’ve heard. ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/48 "2011-07-15T23:29:22Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > Oh wow, I hadn’t even bothered reading the article on this one. The penis-chopping wife was also Asian. Maybe this is the beginning of a coordinated attack - first a penis, then an infant. What’s next? The Tot Offensive. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/49 "2011-07-16T01:54:10Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > Oh wow, I hadn’t even bothered reading the article on this one. The penis-chopping wife was also Asian. Maybe this is the beginning of a coordinated attack - first a penis, then an infant. What’s next? Well, you needed an appetizer. ---
**Author:** ![Baal\_Houtham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baal_houtham/32/13604_2.png) [@Baal\_Houtham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baal_Houtham)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/50 "2011-07-16T02:16:04Z")
Christ, this is disgusting. Would you ghouls be laughing if it was **Your Baby** , and you had just microwaved it yourself? Possibly cackling, but laughing? I would hope not. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/51 "2011-07-16T02:21:40Z")
> [@Baal\_Houtham](#): > > Christ, this is disgusting. Would you ghouls be laughing if it was **Your Baby** , and you had just microwaved it yourself? > > **Possibly cackling** , but laughing? I would hope not. No, cracklings. ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/52 "2011-07-16T02:36:04Z")
> [@Baal\_Houtham](#): > > Christ, this is disgusting. Would you ghouls be laughing if it was **Your Baby** , and you had just microwaved it yourself? > > Possibly cackling, but laughing? I would hope not. In the grand scheme of things, is whether or not you laugh after **microwaving your baby** really all that important? (Except for, you know, establishing your insanity defense.) ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/53 "2011-07-16T08:07:16Z")
> [@Baal\_Houtham](#): > > Christ, this is disgusting. Would you ghouls be laughing if it was **Your Baby** , and you had just microwaved it yourself. Nobody is laughing at the horrific death of a child; it is poking fun at this type of Recreational Outrage in which something so self-evidently awful is paraded with such prurient glee. There is no adequate response, the OP wants either solemn head-nodding, or more usually a catalogue of the various sexual atrocities that ought to be wrought on the perpetrator. We’re just not playing that game. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/54 "2011-07-16T15:26:49Z")
> [@Baal\_Houtham](#): > > Christ, this is disgusting. Would you ghouls be laughing if it was **Your Baby** , and you had just microwaved it yourself? > > Possibly cackling, but laughing? I would hope not. Not sure if this is serious or not, but if it is… Well, none of us would microwave a baby. That’s the thing. And no amount of mourning or wailing is gong to bring that baby back. We all have newspapers or other sources of info to read about this kind of stuff, and don’t need to be scolded about how to feel about something like this. So we joke. It’s a healthy, human response to something that has nothing whatsoever to do with any of us. ---
**Author:** ![Baal\_Houtham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baal_houtham/32/13604_2.png) [@Baal\_Houtham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baal_Houtham)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/55 "2011-07-16T16:39:36Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > Not sure if this is serious or not [QUOTE=Baal Houtham] Christ, this is disgusting. Would you ghouls be laughing if it was Your Baby, and you had just microwaved it yourself? Possibly cackling, but laughing? I would hope not. [/QUOTE] Geez, I didn’t think it was that subtle. Starts off impassioned as it needs to be to momentarily disable the whoosh alarms, but after the boldface **Your Baby** , takes the unexpected but logical twist that if it **was** Your Baby there’s an even chance that it was you doing the microwaving. That kinda undermines the appeal to the reader’s common deceny. Then there’s the wish that someone microwaving their baby would cackle rather than laugh, which makes just enough sense to be silly. ---
**Author:** ![Soliloquy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@Soliloquy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soliloquy)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/56 "2011-07-16T16:44:09Z")
> [@Scissorjack](#): > > Nobody is laughing at the horrific death of a child; it is poking fun at this type of Recreational Outrage in which something so self-evidently awful is paraded with such prurient glee. There is no adequate response, the OP wants either solemn head-nodding, or more usually a catalogue of the various sexual atrocities that ought to be wrought on the perpetrator. We’re just not playing that game. Actually, I was looking for neither. I’ve personally considered serving her a microwaved burrito while at work, just to see how she’d react. Joking like this is exactly what the people around me (and I, myself) at work do. If I was looking for anything, it was a way to keep going to work everyday, looking her in the face, and laughing inside. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/57 "2011-07-16T17:01:47Z")
It’s the same ol’ story though. That’s the thing. Any normal parent has almost made the same mistake. Shit, I made a PB&J sandwich for a late night snack just the other night, and in my grogginess, I put the jelly in the cupboard and the peanut butter in the fridge. When my kids were infants, I can’t tell you how many times the baby woke me in the middle of the night, and I put the bottle of milk in the bouncy seat, and the baby in the… Whoops, close call! ---
**Author:** ![SweetLucy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bcef8e/32.png) [@SweetLucy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SweetLucy)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/58 "2011-07-16T22:18:32Z")
Some people truly deserve to be sterilized, whether they like it or not, just for the good of the human race. They murder their kids and then go on to crank out more. ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/59 "2011-07-16T22:51:41Z")
> [@SweetLucy](#): > > Some people truly deserve to be sterilized, whether they like it or not, just for the good of the human race. They murder their kids and then go on to crank out more. Yeah, but it’s really hard to stuff them into the autoclave. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2011, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062/60 "2011-07-17T12:04:59Z")
And the whole Thread is in a forum named for BBQ. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-microwaves-baby/589062.md?page=4)