# Woman slipped mickey: Was this advice columnist wrong? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 19, 2009, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404 "2009-10-19T22:34:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/41 "2009-10-20T18:49:16Z")
Last night, before I’d read the actual column, I was in the “you’re not _wrong_, Walter; you’re just an asshole” column. But no, it turns out she’s both wrong and an asshole. I mean, honestly, if it’s a safe enough place for the “friends” to leave the author alone and drunk to get home as best she could late at night, it’s safe enough for them to haul their sorry carcasses over to the ER. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/42 "2009-10-20T21:31:59Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > I mean, honestly, if it’s a safe enough place for the “friends” to leave the author alone and drunk to get home as best she could late at night, it’s safe enough for them to haul their sorry carcasses over to the ER. You forgot to consider their STILL pristine vaginas that might be at risk… ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/43 "2009-10-20T23:28:23Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > Last night, before I’d read the actual column, I was in the “you’re not _wrong_, Walter; you’re just an asshole” column. But no, it turns out she’s both wrong and an asshole. Based only on reading the OP, I initially thought perhaps teh columnist was trying a hard-ass approach, along the lines of “You never really know how things will play out, so you need to be vigilant and assume that you are the only person _you_ can count on.” which is not actually bad advice. Upon reading the actual article, I agree, the columnist is both wrong and an asshole. Part of even the loosest pack mentality is “I watch your back, you watch mine.” Under the social covenant of “friendship”, expectations run a little higher. I can’t imagine a) not checking on a friend who seemed to be in the bathroom for an unusually long time b) leaving without knowing where she/he was or what happened. I don’t have the legal responsibilities that I may have for a spouse or child, but you can be damned sure I’m responsible enough that if the well-being of a friend was at stake, I’d take a bit more interest than simply shrugging and saying “Meh, she probably left with some guy.” True enough, some information may be missing. The letter writer could have a history of wildly unpredictable and irresponsible behaviour and her friends had bailed her out time and again until she expected too much one time to many, but without that information, you can only really take the information at face value. As for the columnist assertion that everyone has a misadventure that ends in an ambulance ride? No, that’s actually not normal. Her assumption that it is is similar to when people say: “Well _everyone_ has driven while drunk.” It’s not true. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/44 "2009-10-20T23:44:02Z")
I can’t find it but I read somewhere that the reason why the friends were so reluctant to come to her aid was that they saw her dancing with one of their crushes. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/45 "2009-10-20T23:45:04Z")
I’d escort a _stranger_ in need to the hospital if she had no one and wanted someone with her. Geesh. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/46 "2009-10-20T23:48:19Z")
> [@Ferret\_Herder](#): > > I thought about that, but if it’s the case that she abuses drugs/alcohol and then cries wolf, what her friends need to do is confront her and say “you have a problem, you need to get help, and we’re not going to go out with you” - instead of going to bars with her and then rolling their eyes when the inevitable happens yet again, gosh isn’t that a surprise, and their friend goes ‘wtf, you always help me out of jams otherwise!’ The problem with that is that you are going out with the types of friends who do the drugs that you do more often than not. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/47 "2009-10-20T23:51:09Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Apart from increasing the likelihood of being viewed as a suspect in the (alleged) drugging, color me :dubious: as to whether our Good Samaritan would have taken the same direct personal action if he’d found a dazed, underwear-clad _elderly_ woman in a stairwell. I found an old lady who had fallen from her walker on the street the other day, she was refusing help from people and the problem was whether or not to stand around gawking, an affront to her dignity, or help when other people were already trying was tough. Ultimately she seemed to be getting the help she needed, but I did feel bad being the stereotype of the New Yorker just walking by. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2009, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/48 "2009-10-20T23:52:18Z")
> [@PunditLisa](#): > > I’d escort a _stranger_ in need to the hospital if she had no one and wanted someone with her. > > Geesh. Absolutely. Though it’s less likely that you’re going to know what a stranger needs. ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404/49 "2009-10-21T03:26:55Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > I can’t find it but I read somewhere that the reason why the friends were so reluctant to come to her aid was that they saw her dancing with one of their crushes. Might they have still been drunk and not able to drive? But then they got home in the first place I suppose. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-slipped-mickey-was-this-advice-columnist-wrong/514404.md?page=2)