# Woman swept to sea during proposal **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 6, 2008, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959 "2008-12-06T04:56:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2008, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/21 "2008-12-06T22:59:07Z")
> [@Laughing\_Lagomorph](#): > > The woman in question was apparently tiny, from the Phillipines, and I imagine the water is pretty cold off the coast of Oregon in early December. There actually was an article on CBC News a number of years ago that apparently drowning is a fairly severe problem among middle-class immigrant communities in Canada. You come to Canada, you want to enjoy the beautiful lakes and so forth, but swimming and water safety lessons since childhood are not as routine in other parts of the world. It’s very sad, and a little-known problem. ---
**Author:** ![XJETGIRLX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9fc29f/32.png) [@XJETGIRLX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XJETGIRLX)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2008, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/22 "2008-12-06T23:26:56Z")
> [@Colophon](#): > > You serious? If I’d been recently bereaved the last thing I’d want is to receive a card from a bunch of cyberstalkers. :eek: Ditto. This seems exceptionally creepy to me. Sad story though. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Washoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecae2f/32.png) [@Washoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Washoe)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2008, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/23 "2008-12-06T23:41:22Z")
I really don’t see why. I understand that the girl in Minneapolis received thousands of letters of condolence from literally all over the world, many of which included gifts such as stuffed animals and even money. Is it creepy when people leave flowers alongside the road when someday dies in a traffic accident? I don’t know if that’s a common practice in all areas of the United States, but here in Southern California it’s incredibly common. Where I live, you see about one a month. They can be very elaborate, too. ---
**Author:** ![supergoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@supergoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supergoose)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2008, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/24 "2008-12-06T23:50:03Z")
I generally say, if you have a generous impulse, you should act on it. It’s not like the world is overflowing with it. Besides, I doubt a little creepiness is going to rate much next to “just lost your fiance.” ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2008, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/25 "2008-12-06T23:50:44Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > Not to be rude but how does one get swept to sea by a 3 foot high wave? Even though the article states the woman is very small, that’s still . . . a very small wave. Maybe she couldn’t swim or something, in which case, taking her to the ocean to propose probably wasn’t the best idea. > > Still, gotta feel bad for the families involved. Once when I was learning to surf–about 11, weighed maybe 80 pounds, but I was a really good swimmer–some evil wave seemed to grab me by the ankle and drag me backwards into the sea. Honestly, that’s what it felt like One of my bigger cousins grabbed my hand and pulled me back. So I only ended up with sand up my nose, instead of swept out to sea and drowned. This was on the beach at Santa Barbara, not usually known for this kind of wave. I know about undertow, but that was serious undertow! If she didn’t know how to swim, if the wave surprised her and was cold (and the water on the Oregon Coast has always seemed pretty cold to me, even in the summer), I can easily see how this could happen. A 3-foot wave can knock you off your feet. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/26 "2008-12-07T01:07:06Z")
One part of me says: I’ve read enough news stories in my day. He pushed her. Another part of me says: Pretty much this exact thing happened to a friend of mine’s mom in 9th grade, and I know she didn’t push her own mom. She was traumatized by it. ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/27 "2008-12-07T02:10:25Z")
Add my name, too, please. I’ll PM it shortly. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/28 "2008-12-07T03:15:37Z")
Well, I feel like he’ll probably get over it. He was 43 and she was 19 when they started “dating”. Somehow I don’t feel like a middle aged American man is feeling a real cosmic soul mate connection to a teenager on the other side of the world. Sad story. I feel bad for the family. But man I wish people were a little less sleazy. When you go to the Pacific Coast, read the signs. This stuff is dangerous. We used to have a sign in Santa Cruz with a yearly death count of people who got swept off a specific cliff by surprise waves. And every day I’d see some family blithely picnicking in the shadow of the sign. We had a “wife swept away” story. The idiots decided to check out a period of “big waves”, when everyone in town was warned to stay far away from beaches and cliffs. The ocean can and will kick your butt. ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/29 "2008-12-07T03:24:04Z")
[QUOTE=supergoose] I wouldn’t use dopernames, as many are jokes and could be taken as mocking. [/QUOTE] Nonsense! ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Peste](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Doctor\_Peste](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Peste)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/30 "2008-12-07T03:35:46Z")
I’ll go in on it. Don’t really think creepiness ranks that close to “watched your fiance drown immediately upon proposing.” ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/31 "2008-12-07T03:42:23Z")
Well, I think that story is fucking hilarious. Sorry. Some dirty old man tries to import a teenage girl willing to do anything for a free citizenship from the Philippines, then God intervenes right at his big moment. The goat loses his child bride, her family loses its meal ticket, all with one random wave. I’m very, very sorry, but I think this story is funny…and less of a tragedy for this girl than if she’d really had to marry this slob. I know. I’m evil. What am I going to do? I’d bet anything I’m not the only one who was thinking this, though. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/32 "2008-12-07T03:45:23Z")
> [@Doctor\_Peste](#): > > I’ll go in on it. Don’t really think creepiness ranks that close to “watched your fiance drown immediately upon proposing.” Please. He’d never even met her before. They’d only “dated” on the internet. It was a tragedy for her family, a loss of an internet acquaintance for him ---
**Author:** ![CAT\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@CAT\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CAT_1)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/33 "2008-12-07T03:57:36Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > . > > I know. I’m evil. What am I going to do? I’d bet anything I’m not the only one who was thinking this, though. Nope, you weren’t. It isn’t exactly the same but, when I read the story to my husband, we both said that maybe the girl took one look at the guy, getting ready to propose, and swam away at the first chance. Or worse, let the wave take her away. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/34 "2008-12-07T04:20:43Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > We used to have a sign in Santa Cruz with a yearly death count of people who got swept off a specific cliff by surprise waves. There’s such a sign at [Nooksack Falls](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nooksack_Falls). I don’t recall, but the people who have died for a better look may have been listed by name. I remember one person was listed as pregnant. ---
**Author:** ![Washoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecae2f/32.png) [@Washoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Washoe)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/35 "2008-12-07T04:46:10Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > I’d bet anything I’m not the only one who was thinking this, though. To be perfectly honest, I was thinking the same thing. But after I saw the video (which unfortunately was removed later) it was readily apparent that he was deeply upset by what had happened. Granted, he may be old enough to be her father, but there’s a lot of guys out there who never quite mastered the social skills necessary to attract the type of woman that the alpha male bags. I feel confident that his affection for her was genuine. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/36 "2008-12-07T06:06:16Z")
Well, yeah. I’d be upset and crying my eyes out if I saw _anyone_ swept away at sea. And I’m sure he had all kinds of fantasies about spending his twilight years with his young, tiny, foreign bride that were lost in one fell swoop. But you don’t need to be an alpha male to find a mate your own age. Social skills or none, it’s always going to be sleezy and gross for old men (or old women, as happens often enough) to go to desperately poor countries and pick up on teenagers. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/37 "2008-12-07T06:41:57Z")
> [@Washoe](#): > > Is it creepy when people leave flowers alongside the road when someday dies in a traffic accident? Yes. Less so because, in general, the people who leave those flowers actually knew the victims/families involved but it’s still weird. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/38 "2008-12-07T06:49:10Z")
> [@Silver\_Fire](#): > > Yes. Less so because, in general, the people who leave those flowers actually knew the victims/families involved but it’s still weird. On the road to my house is a cross that has been well-tended for the five years I’ve been here. I’ve never stopped to investigate, but driving by I see a date of '77. I don’t know if that’s a birth date or death date. Just last week I saw an elderly woman decorating it with Autumn flowers. I’ve always found it a bit creepy and sad. This woman will stay in her home until she dies, as to move away would be to leave her son’s (or grandson’s) dying spot. ---
**Author:** ![Sunrazor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sunrazor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunrazor)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/39 "2008-12-07T13:53:20Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Well, I think that story is fucking hilarious. Sorry. Some dirty old man tries to import a teenage girl willing to do anything for a free citizenship from the Philippines, then God intervenes right at his big moment. The goat loses his child bride, her family loses its meal ticket, all with one random wave. I’m very, very sorry, but I think this story is funny…and less of a tragedy for this girl than if she’d really had to marry this slob. > > I know. I’m evil. What am I going to do? I’d bet anything I’m not the only one who was thinking this, though. You’re not alone, Diogenes. The man who was best man at my wedding over 35 years ago finally got married just four years ago to a Filipino mail-order bride. He was 53, she was 22. Now, I love the guy like a brother, but he was determined to find a woman with whom he would never have any conflict. When he couldn’t find one, he bought one. At their wedding, he introduced me to three other fellows, all approximately our age, who’d struck similar deals. It was all just a little creepy. I feel sorry for the poor schlub who lost his fiance, but this wasn’t a couple of love-struck kids getting ready to take the big step. This was a business deal that was interrupted by Mother Nature. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2008, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959/40 "2008-12-07T14:13:02Z")
> [@Washoe](#): > > I really don’t see why. I understand that the girl in Minneapolis received thousands of letters of condolence from literally all over the world, many of which included gifts such as stuffed animals and even money. Is it creepy when people leave flowers alongside the road when someday dies in a traffic accident? I don’t know if that’s a common practice in all areas of the United States, but here in Southern California it’s incredibly common. Where I live, you see about one a month. They can be very elaborate, too. I agree. I think if I was hurting from a loss I’d try to find comfort in every bit of condolence sent my way. Doesn’t matter who it’s from. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-swept-to-sea-during-proposal/475959.md?page=3)