# Woman wants me to shave my bird and get a penile implant **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 28, 2003, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-wants-me-to-shave-my-bird-and-get-a-penile-implant/178114 "2003-05-28T20:59:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-wants-me-to-shave-my-bird-and-get-a-penile-implant/178114/61 "2003-06-01T02:47:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dijon Warlock \* > \*\*Are you sure it’s a swallow? Maybe it’s a spit. \*\* No silly, a spitz is a [_dog_](http://www.akc.org/breeds/recbreeds/finnish.cfm) Even a toddler can tell the difference between a bird and a dog 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Einmon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Einmon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Einmon)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-wants-me-to-shave-my-bird-and-get-a-penile-implant/178114/62 "2003-06-01T16:30:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by astro \* > **Penile _extensions_ are fairly gruesome surgical procedures … \** Nah…I think you don’t know what you’re saying. I’ve had it on authority of Mr **Youc andoit** and Mr **Itseasy** who assured me via my hotmail account that I, too, could _easily_ get my penis enlarged. And as soon as the money from Nigeria comes in, I plan to give it a try. Female Schmemale. ---
**Author:** ![Einmon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Einmon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Einmon)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-wants-me-to-shave-my-bird-and-get-a-penile-implant/178114/63 "2003-06-01T16:34:16Z")
The **\** I added to the quote above now really cracks me up, by the way. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-wants-me-to-shave-my-bird-and-get-a-penile-implant/178114/64 "2003-06-02T13:00:08Z")
**[Beer in a bag…](http://cu.clarkson.edu/projects/reushen/reu_china/Qingdao2002/Culture/ChinaCulture.htm)** > [@](#): > > My first experience with beer in a bag was a classic case of poor luck. Upon being asked how much beer I wanted, “Duo Shao,” I replied, “Wu Kuai,” so that the vendor would approximate the amount of beer to match five yuan. That she did, but because the keg was at its bottom she was only able to give me half the amount asked for and it was the most foamy, apparently stale beer I had ever seen. She did, however, tap another keg and then filled the remainder. Feeling like the dilution ratio may have compensated for the bad taste expected from the bottom of the keg beer, I happily strolled away for home proudly flaunting my beer in a bag and my beer gut. Upon arriving at home I immediately put this mystery stuff to the test and to what should not have been my surprise, **beer in a bag was the most foul-tasting substance I have ever willingly put in my mouth**. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-wants-me-to-shave-my-bird-and-get-a-penile-implant/178114/65 "2003-06-02T15:00:16Z")
Funnily enough - inside the box of wine there is a bag. so you can at least get bags of wine. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-wants-me-to-shave-my-bird-and-get-a-penile-implant/178114/66 "2003-06-02T15:10:39Z")
Whoops. DIdn’t mean to bump this thread. Didn’t think. Sorry. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woman-wants-me-to-shave-my-bird-and-get-a-penile-implant/178114.md?page=3)