# Women: Do you find tall men intimidating? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 26, 2003, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367 "2003-04-26T19:08:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![jellen92](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/6bbea6/32.png) [@jellen92](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jellen92)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/61 "2003-04-28T17:18:28Z")
I was never into tall men until I started dating one (he is 6’6", 220 lbs. and I’m 5’4"). Now that I am dating someone who is so tall, I’d never go back. I love standing next to him, I love it that he is tall and attractive and I love feeling small next to him. He’s lean and sexy - YUM! I have never felt intimidated by him either, he stands out more and that is sexy as hell. I’ve noticed people easily befriend him, I’ve read somewhere that tall people are viewed as more successful than their smaller counterparts. (not that it’s true, but people really believe this)… And for the record - it is not difficult for a shorter woman to be with a taller man - we hold hands, hug, dance, kiss, and it’s all normal. ---
**Author:** ![hedra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/779978/32.png) [@hedra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hedra)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/62 "2003-04-28T17:53:54Z")
Tallish woman checking in. (a smidge shy of 5’10" - I’ve shrunk, apparently) Really tall men don’t intimidate me. However, I do find I get a crick in my neck when kissing them. It can become rather painful after a few months. I find men slightly shorter than me and up to several inches taller than me ‘just fine’. The smallest guy I ever slept with was about 4’11", and that did indeed creep me out a bit, as I realized his hands were about the size of a 10-year-olds in my family. Bad image. Don’t know that I’ve gone for anyone on height alone, or even as a weed-out factor. I like tall, I like short, because I like them. Almost married a guy the exact same height as me (meaning all shoes with heels made him appear shorter). Big :shrug: So, yeah, there are women who like short guys. And I only find intimidation intimidating. Height isn’t a relevant factor. My ‘tall’ comeback (thanks to my sister): “You’re tall” “Yeah, I know. My feet only just barely touch the ground.” (the length of the pause as they figure this one out can be entertaining…) ---
**Author:** ![shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shrew)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/63 "2003-04-28T18:19:42Z")
Only if he’s holding a weapon. Height is irrelevant. I’ve lusted after some pretty short guys, and I’ve lusted after some fairly tall fellas. As **rubystreak** said, sexy is sexy is sexy. Personality is where it’s at. I don’t think I’ve ever walked up to someone and said, “Wow. You’re tall.” I have, however, walked up to someone and said, “You seem nice. What’s your name?” ---
**Author:** ![ouisey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9fc29f/32.png) [@ouisey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouisey)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/64 "2003-04-28T18:26:52Z")
As a 5’10" female, I would probably go for a guy over 6’ (cuz I think it’d be aesthetically pleasing to see us together) except for one factor… The way I see it, is when a shorter guy asks me out, its because he’s got all kinds of self-confidence (that and I’m rather attractive, if I may so so:)). A self confident man is so sexy to me, and that’s why I am dating a 5’8" guy with the biggest pair of balls (figuratively speaking) that I’ve ever seen. What’s with all these guys coming up to me and telling me that I must be over six feet tall? “Because I’m six feet and you’re taller than me.”, they say. Why are all these men living in self-delusion? thx ---
**Author:** ![Belrix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed655f/32.png) [@Belrix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belrix)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/65 "2003-04-28T18:29:41Z")
“You’re tall, do you play basketball?” “No. You’re short, do you play miniature golf?” …I’m tall but I never get asked “Basketball”, I get asked “Football” becuase of my build. I answer, “No. I play saxophone.” ---
**Author:** ![six-o](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@six-o](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/six-o)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/66 "2003-04-28T18:51:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Doctor Goo Fee \* > \*\*Also… That’s insulting in at least two ways. One, you assert that all ‘little’ guys are invisible. Nice. And, two, you assert that because people like you ignore them, they have to be especially obnoxious just to get your attention. Really nice. > > Of course these assertions get thrown right out the window if the short guy has money or fame or both. Right? \*\* This is called short man’s syndrome, and apparently, you have gone ahead and proved the point (With your obnoxious post). This is detected and identified by everyone. I do have to admit it is a sweeping generality, but of course, it does tend to hold true. I’m 6’3" @ 220. I’m not huge, but I can hold my own. There is nothing more annoying than some little quirk being a prick because he thinks I’d be violating some code of ethics by pummelling him because he’s too small and it’s obvious I’d destroy him. I loathe resorting to violence, and I have never intiated it, but having someone that’s 5’6" 140 trying to push me around like I’m some big dumb schlep really pisses me off. I don’t care if you’re 5’6", but there is no reason to be offensive to me because this women thats 5’10" prefers to talk to me because you’re a little squirt. Sorry little man, but move along in line. Or do whatever it is that you need to do (get a penis enlargement, get famous, or be rich) to get her. If she’s that shallow _wink of irony_, she’s all yours. ---
**Author:** ![troub](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troub/32/14802_2.png) [@troub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/troub)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/67 "2003-04-28T19:19:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mipiace \* > **. . .but a 6’4" or above guy is like a magnet.** So it’s established that I’m a magnet, where are all the iron chicks? :dubious: 😃 😃 😃 ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/68 "2003-04-28T19:40:18Z")
I don’t find tall guys intimidating in the slightest. However, tallness makes it harder to give them decent hugs, and harder to look them in the eyes when you’re close to them. I have a very, very narrow range of heights that I like. I’m 5’9", and I like guys who are 5’ 10.5" to 6’ 0.5" or so - this is the perfect height for comfortably resting my head on their shoulder while hugging them, given the slightly increased thickness of the soles of most girl-shoes, and given that I don’t wear heels. Picky, picky, picky… ---
**Author:** ![Pablito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ed655f/32.png) [@Pablito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pablito)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/69 "2003-04-28T19:59:26Z")
**six-o** –The air must be pretty thin up there for you to be missing how obnoxious and overreactive your own post is. Breathe deeply for a minute there and lighten up. Otherwise, don’t complain if your post is cited as an example of some other kind of syndrome. 😉 > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by six-o:_ I do have to admit it is a sweeping generality, but of course, it does tend to hold true. And by the way, it’s rhetorically unsound to dismiss a stereotype in the same sentence in which you embrace it. ---
**Author:** ![six-o](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@six-o](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/six-o)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/70 "2003-04-28T20:27:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Pablito \* > \*\ ***six-o** –The air must be pretty thin up there for you to be missing how obnoxious and overreactive your own post is. Breathe deeply for a minute there and lighten up. Otherwise, don’t complain if your post is cited as an example of some other kind of syndrome. 😉 > > And by the way, it’s rhetorically unsound to dismiss a stereotype in the same sentence in which you embrace it. \*\* I am aware that my post with a bit over reactive. I had some little squirt continuously walking in front of me last night while I tried to play darts. I finally gave him the eye after he walked in front of me 4 times in mid throw (I was debating just hitting him in the head). Anyways, this guys post seemed to remind me of said squirt, and I guess I just needed to vent. I also understand that it is rhetorically unsound to dismiss a stereotype and then embrace it. I was trying to convey, “it’s a stereotype, but there are obviously exceptions.” I just finished watching the movie Confidence yesterday. Maybe I should follow that advice. Take a step back, take a deep breathe, count to ten, think about it, and respond. Thanks Pablito. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Lance\_Murdoch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/47e85d/32.png) [@Captain\_Lance\_Murdoch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Lance_Murdoch)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/71 "2003-04-28T20:36:05Z")
> [@](#): > > This is called short man’s syndrome, and apparently, you have gone ahead and proved the point (With your obnoxious post). This is detected and identified by everyone. I’m sorry Dr. **Six-o** , but there is no psychological condition known as “short man’s syndrome.” > [@](#): > > I do have to admit it is a sweeping generality, but of course, it does tend to hold true. I’m 6’3" @ 220. I’m not huge, but I can hold my own. I’m 6’3.” I can hold my own. Therefore, sweeping generality about short guys is true. > [@](#): > > There is nothing more annoying than some little quirk being a prick because he thinks I’d be violating some code of ethics by pummelling him because he’s too small and it’s obvious I’d destroy him. Some “quirks” just deserve a “pummelling.” > [@](#): > > I loathe resorting to violence, and I have never intiated it, but having someone that’s 5’6" 140 trying to push me around like I’m some big dumb schlep really pisses me off. You? Dumb? noooooo! It’s obvious you’re a paragon of virtue. > [@](#): > > I don’t care if you’re 5’6", but there is no reason to be offensive to me because this women thats 5’10" prefers to talk to me because you’re a little squirt. “This women thats” 5’10” talks to you because of someone _else’s_ height? > [@](#): > > Sorry little man, but move along in line. Or do whatever it is that you need to do (get a penis enlargement, get famous, or be rich) to get her. If she’s that shallow _wink of irony_, she’s all yours. Okay, come clean. This post was a joke right? This is detected and identified by everyone. ---
**Author:** ![six-o](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@six-o](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/six-o)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2003, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/72 "2003-04-28T22:03:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by six-o \* > **(I was debating just hitting him in the head).** I meant, hitting him in the head ith the dart as he walked in front of me. > [@](#): > > I’m sorry Dr. Six-o, but there is no psychological condition known as “short man’s syndrome.” Huh, I thought it was fairly well known, at least it is among me friends. Basically, it when smaller men become over aggressive to compensate for their smaller bodies. I’d have to admit, not all short guys have short mans syndrome, as a matter of fact, I’d say the majority don’t, but I do think that there exist men out there that have the syndrome. > [@](#): > > Some “quirks” just deserve a “pummelling.” When they are seeming to intentionally “disrespect” you by walking in front of my darts 4 times, it’s annoying. I really didn’t care to get into a dick swinging contest with him, and I asked him politely if he would mind waiting a second until the “turn was up.” I think this is fairly standard bar etiquette. > [@](#): > > You? Dumb? noooooo! It’s obvious you’re a paragon of virtue. No, no. Let them address me. It’s about time I got to answer some questions here. Which makes me wonder if this…rogzilla, has any idea as to the kind of grades one must receive in college, to be accepted to a top medical school? Or if you have the vaguest clue about how talented someone must be to lead a surgical team? I have an M.D. from Harvard. I am board certified in cardiothorasic medicine and trauma surgery. I have been awarded citations from seven different medical boards in New England and I am never, ever sick at sea. So I ask you; when someone goes into that chapel and they fall on their knees and they pray to God that their wife doesn’t miscarry or that their daughter doesn’t bleed to death or that their mother doesn’t suffer acute neural trauma from postoperative shock, who do you think they’re praying to? Now you go ahead and read your bible-rogzilla–and you go to your church and with any luck you might even win the annual raffle. But if you’re looking for God, he was on Straight Dope, on April 28th, and he doesn’t like being second guessed. You want to know if I have a God complex? Let me tell you something–I AM GOD > [@](#): > > “This women thats” 5’10” talks to you because of someone else’s height? He was checking her out the whole night, and I gave him every opportunity to make his move. I got sit of waiting and asked her to come over and play darts with me. > [@](#): > > Okay, come clean. This post was a joke right? It was a cross of flame-bait, venting and a bit of truth. ---
**Author:** ![shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shrew)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2003, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/73 "2003-04-29T17:42:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by six-o \* > > Huh, I thought it was fairly well known, at least it is among me friends. Basically, it when smaller men become over aggressive to compensate for their smaller bodies. I think short man syndrome falls under the same category as “white man’s burden”. The phrase is thrown around a lot, but it’s not a technically sound phrase. For example, you wouldn’t hear a psychologist tell a man, “You suffer from short man syndrome”. And just for the record, I refer to it as “Little Man Syndrome” the way Steinbeck does in _Of Mice and Men_, but I could be remembering it incorrectly. There are all sorts of stereotypes like this one. I found myself saying a few weeks ago, “You know, she’s one of those girls who overcompensates for being big by being funny.” I myself am a big girl and couldn’t believe I had said it, true as it may have been. The stereotype is one with which I’m familiar, but I certainly wouldn’t hold it to any litmus tests. ---
**Author:** ![Lobelia\_Overhill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/54ee81/32.png) [@Lobelia\_Overhill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobelia_Overhill)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/74 "2003-08-15T12:33:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ender\_Will \* > \*\*Reading through all these, I think that “intimidate” wasn’t the appropriate word. I should have asked something along the lines of “Women: What’s your initial reaction to a very tall man?” > > A semi-related question, which **[kelebrian@hotmail.com](mailto:kelebrian@hotmail.com)** brought up: why is it more socially acceptable to point out that someone is tall than it is to point out that they are short? \*\* In the first instance, I’d try to catch you eye, and engage you in conversation … In the second … I’ll never understand why shorties do that … “How’s the weather up there?” “Why do you wnt to know, you’re not likely to be here on holiday any time soon” ---
**Author:** ![AbbySthrnAccent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@AbbySthrnAccent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AbbySthrnAccent)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/75 "2003-08-15T14:23:07Z")
Put me down for another “likes 'em tall”. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/76 "2003-08-15T14:48:41Z")
I’m five feet even when I’m wearing shoes and the wind is right, and I positively _adore_ tall men. My first boyfriend was 6’4", and while it made slow dancing a little awkward, I never had to reach for anything. I have often heard incredibly witty comments like “How’s the weather down there?” and “So, what are living conditions like in Munchkinland these days?” and the ever-popular “Wow, you’re _short!_” My usual reply, since I also have red hair, is to tell people I’m half leprechaun. I don’t find tall men intimidating at all (unless they’re obviously threatening or invading my personal space, but then I’ll find just about anybody intimidating–until I get MAD), but I often find myself intimidated by tall women. My boss (soon to be ex-boss in, oh … five hours or so) is over a foot taller than me. She usually stands close enough that she’s clearly looking down on me, and I get so infuriated it literally makes my teeth itch. I’ve been told that there are plenty of men who prefer petite women, but let me tell you, it certainly doesn’t make me feel any better when I’m standing next to a six-foot, 110-pound wannabe supermodel. ---
**Author:** ![Isabelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5a626/32.png) [@Isabelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isabelle)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/77 "2003-08-15T14:53:08Z")
I find them extremly attractive! ---
**Author:** ![MindWanderer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@MindWanderer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MindWanderer)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/78 "2003-08-15T15:52:18Z")
I’m a 5’1 guy and I think there is a children are short so you must be a young kid really gets you if you are a short guy. I’m 25 and most people think I’m 12 or 13, so I get ignored a lot for being short, or when people I don’t know see me at work they wig and think I’m Dougie Howser or something. I don’t think its that they always ignore short people but as others have said its easy to slip into thinking that the short guy is a kid. ---
**Author:** ![jellen92](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/6bbea6/32.png) [@jellen92](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jellen92)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/79 "2003-08-15T16:41:44Z")
I am 5’3" and by boyfriend is 6’6"… we manage JUST fine… I never dated a tall guy before now, and now that I’m dating a tall man, I find him more and more sexy everyday. ---
**Author:** ![rockle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@rockle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rockle)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367/80 "2003-08-15T17:44:22Z")
I am 4’ 11½" and my husband is 6’ 3". My husband’s height was, honestly, one of the last things I noticed about him. When you’re as short as I am, and you’re always looking up to have conversations, everyone is tall. I will admit, though, that I was never particularly attracted to shorter men. My shortest boyfriend was 5’ 8", the same as my dad. Anybody shorter than that was just too short. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-do-you-find-tall-men-intimidating/171367.md?page=5)