# Women only: have you figured out how to give a urine specimine at the doc's office without... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 30, 2016, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460 "2016-08-30T04:23:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/1 "2016-08-30T04:23:55Z")
…peeing all over your hand? I haven’t. \*Warning: this post may contain TMI. \* When I had to do a 24-hour collection one time at home in one of those big brown bottles, I bought a funnel from an auto parts store. That worked great. Sometimes, too, in the hospital, they provide a “hat,” which sits across the toilet and collects whatever you’re depositing. But that little screw-top container, barely bigger than a shot glass… _\_ in all the years I’ve been giving samples, I haven’t identified or perfected a technique. Mostly I rely on luck. In the bathroom, they should provide those paper funnels that you get at the gas station for putting oil in your car. Or those doodads that facilitate women peeing in the woods. Are men puzzled by this dilemma? Possibly they don’t realize that you’re not exactly sure where the stream is going to come out. There’s sort of a zone, but you really don’t know until it starts to flow and then you just have to do your best to catch it. If any women have a foolproof technique, do share. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/2 "2016-08-30T07:37:15Z")
It varies by location, because so does the recipient I get. The last few times I’ve gotten a plastic pot about the size of a water glass: you pee a bit in the toilet, stand up, pee in the pot (no problems aiming, at least for me, but I know other people don’t do so well), finish back in the toilet, pour sample from the pot to the two test tubes and cap them. Put the tubes in the ziploc that’s part of the whole kit, take to the doc. If I had to pee directly into the tube _yeah right_. ---
**Author:** ![Mann\_Slaughter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@Mann\_Slaughter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mann_Slaughter)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/3 "2016-08-30T08:27:56Z")
I know you asked women only, and I’m not a woman, but my cousin Glynis is. She’s also a co-inventor of “TidyCup: The Clean Simple Solution”, which allows a woman to take a mid-stream urine sample without peeing on her hands. [https://www.facebook.com/tidycup/](https://www.facebook.com/tidycup/) Being male, I’m not exactly sure how the TidyCup works, but people who have used it swear that it does. -Slaughter ---
**Author:** ![TheChileanBlob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thechileanblob/32/435_2.png) [@TheChileanBlob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheChileanBlob)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/4 "2016-08-30T11:00:13Z")
It’s worse with drug testing, because you’re not allowed to wash your hands. How I do it is start peeing, then hold the cup under the “faucet.” Still gets on the side of the cup/hands. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Mapp](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miss_mapp/32/369_2.png) [@Miss\_Mapp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Mapp)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 11:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/5 "2016-08-30T11:21:41Z")
It’s a matter of luck for me. I managed not to at the doctor’s last week. The last time, however… ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/6 "2016-08-30T11:30:09Z")
I plié and hope for the best. I agree with the funnel idea; those should be provided, though just as they are sold now, they’d mess up the cleanliness of the sample. They could maybe be made in a way that wouldn’t – possible new product idea! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/7 "2016-08-30T11:58:15Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > Are men puzzled by this dilemma? Possibly they don’t realize that you’re not exactly sure where the stream is going to come out. There’s sort of a zone, but you really don’t know until it starts to flow and then you just have to do your best to catch it. Guy here. It’s not always so easy with us either. For various reasons the pee can come out at some very odd angles, and sometimes more than one stream, or a spray. ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/8 "2016-08-30T12:00:59Z")
That happens to women, too. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/9 "2016-08-30T12:12:50Z")
Huh. I must be an outlier because I actually do have a pretty good idea where the stream is going to go. I also must have great kegel muscles because I can start and stop the stream with no problem. You’re supposed to pee in the toilet _first_, then fill the cup? I just fill the cup and finish in the toilet. Good aim for a girl is a talent that came in handy on construction site where the “toilet” was a soda cup from the local 7/Eleven or equivalent. Which is not to say I’ve never zapped my hand, but that’s what sinks and/or hand sanitizers are for. Never asked to pee in a test tube - it’s always been the “water glass” container, which you then cap securely. Maybe at the lab they decant it into tubes. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/10 "2016-08-30T12:28:17Z")
> [@Mann\_Slaughter](#): > > I know you asked women only, and I’m not a woman, but my cousin Glynis is. > She’s also a co-inventor of “TidyCup: The Clean Simple Solution”, which allows a woman to take a mid-stream urine sample without peeing on her hands. > [https://www.facebook.com/tidycup/](https://www.facebook.com/tidycup/) > > Being male, I’m not exactly sure how the TidyCup works, but people who have used it swear that it does. > > -Slaughter God bless her! > [@GrumpyBunny](#): > > I plié and hope for the best. I agree with the funnel idea; those should be provided, though just as they are sold now, they’d mess up the cleanliness of the sample. They could maybe be made in a way that wouldn’t – possible new product idea! I guess you’re right that a funnel would interfere with the sterile sample factor. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/11 "2016-08-30T13:13:39Z")
> [@GrumpyBunny](#): > > I agree with the funnel idea; those should be provided, though just as they are sold now, they’d mess up the cleanliness of the sample. They could maybe be made in a way that wouldn’t – possible new product idea! Include them in the sampling kit. And yes, the instructions we’re usually given here include “not the first few ml”. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/12 "2016-08-30T15:07:43Z")
My mother has to have frequent tinkle tests because of kidney disease. Each time she drops off a sample they give her a clean cup and bag to take home, then when she has to do the next one she pees into a big disposable plastic cup and then pours it into the specimen cup. See if they’ll give you one to take home so you can do the transfer or funnel method. ---
**Author:** ![brainstall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@brainstall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brainstall)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/13 "2016-08-30T15:26:39Z")
Maybe I’m the only one who does this, but I can pee standing up. I don’t usually, but sometimes circumstances make that the best option and having to pee in a wee cup is one of them. (Really gross porta-potties are another) Place cup directly in front. Pee out quantity needed. Remove cup and finish. ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/14 "2016-08-30T15:30:49Z")
After doing every few weeks for a couple of pregnancies the only advice I can offer is: It’s farther forward than you think. ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/15 "2016-08-30T16:03:00Z")
Yeah, clean catch urine samples require pee a bit into the toilet, then the cup, then finish in the toilet. Even if not instructed now, that is the way I do it. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/16 "2016-08-30T16:09:22Z")
> [@Azeotrope](#): > > My mother has to have frequent tinkle tests because of kidney disease. Each time she drops off a sample they give her a clean cup and bag to take home, then when she has to do the next one she pees into a big disposable plastic cup and then pours it into the specimen cup. See if they’ll give you one to take home so you can do the transfer or funnel method. The good thing about doing it there is that I gave the sample yesterday afternoon and by 9 PM the results were already posted on the patient portal (website). THAT’S what I call service. (And yes, I do have a UTI. Oddly, I took my dog in to the vet this morning, and he has a UTI also.) ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/17 "2016-08-30T16:10:23Z")
> [@cher3](#): > > After doing every few weeks for a couple of pregnancies the only advice I can offer is: It’s farther forward than you think. No doubt I will be doing more of these, and I’ll keep that in mind. ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/18 "2016-08-30T16:16:56Z")
I got pretty good at this when I was dealing with cancer. It’s fairly far forward as someone mentioned. What I did was not just hold the cup underneath, but raise it up and press it against the skin making a seal. This way, I didn’t have to worry about weird angles. t took a time or two to figure placement, but after that it was no problem. I guess a general guide would be to put the cup over the vaginal entrance, then move it forward about an inch (hopefully cups are a fairly standard size.) ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/19 "2016-08-30T16:23:28Z")
I’m going to have to move this over to my “What I’ve learned from the Dope” thread. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460/20 "2016-08-30T20:31:26Z")
I just press the cup directly against the appropriate area, and let loose. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-only-have-you-figured-out-how-to-give-a-urine-specimine-at-the-docs-office-without/764460.md?page=2)