# Women, oral sex, and vaginal odor: am I the only one that cares? (Possible TMI) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 1, 2003, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375 "2003-05-01T13:42:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![lorinada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b5e925/32.png) [@lorinada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorinada)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/61 "2003-05-04T03:19:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by birdgirl \* > \*\*I guess I agree that it’s a privilege not a right in theory, however, please keep in mind that many or most women cannot have an orgasm through intercourse alone. Many women rely on oral sex to get an orgasm. So if you’re not doing this for your woman, then you may be depriving her of her well-deserved orgasm. That would kind of be like asking you to have intercourse, but on the condition that you could not climax. What fun would that be? Not much. I dare say that both women and men have the right to achieve orgasm if they are participating in sex… > > Perhaps, if you were unwilling or unable to help your woman achieve orgasm, YOU might get the boot, right quickly. It would be a lot to ask of someone to go without orgasms just because you don’t like the smell. \*\* Well, I wonder if this is true. No, I can’t orgasm through vaginal sex, but I still don’t want oral sex. My men have always done quite well getting me off with their hands, and the added bonus is that they’re often kissing me or talking to me at the same time, instead of me staring up at the ceiling. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/62 "2003-05-04T03:20:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lizard \* > \*\*No kiddin’! Reading this thread has caused me to think that very thing. I am currently on a self-imposed hiatus from all sexual contact of any kind with the opposite sex. It’s surprising how much I really don’t miss it. ☹ > > But just to be factually accurate, I never actually had intercourse with the woman who didn’t want men to come inside her. As soon as I was sure she was serious I broke it off. > I think if everyone listed their sexual experiences as thoroughly as I have, we’d probably all seem a little weird. \*\* Not to be nosy, but how old are you? ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/63 "2003-05-04T03:27:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lorinada \* > \*\*Well, I wonder if this is true. No, I can’t orgasm through vaginal sex, but I still don’t want oral sex. My men have always done quite well getting me off with their hands, and the added bonus is that they’re often kissing me or talking to me at the same time, instead of me staring up at the ceiling. \*\* Wow! really? I can’t imagine not getting it at least once a month or so. What turned you off of it? …sort of a hijack, but sort of on-topic too no? ---
**Author:** ![lorinada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b5e925/32.png) [@lorinada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorinada)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/64 "2003-05-04T03:40:40Z")
It doesn’t turn me off, it just simply does not turn me on. I don’t avoid it, I just don’t encourage it. It may be becuase I’ve never been brought to orgasm that way. I guess I have a “tough” clit that can only be stimulated manually - a tongue is way too “soft” to even arouse me. It may be that I love face-to-face sex play, and not only is cunnilingus not face-to-face, but since I find the odor it leaves on my partner’s face objectionable it kills any further face-to-face play. That plus the fact that the only “feeling” I get out of it is that I’m being slobbered on. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Blunty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@Captain\_Blunty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Blunty)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/65 "2003-05-04T04:21:40Z")
I had an ex boyfriend who wouldn’t go anywhere _near_ it with his mouth. He had a bad experience with a girl who didn’t inform him she was having her period… and let me tell you, the story he proceeded to tell me was so icky it almost turned _me_ off the idea of oral! I’ve never had a man or woman tell me they disliked my smell. I’ve had some very special friends that would stay down there for _hours_ . I don’t do anything special, just shower every day and try to avoid wearing nylon panties. My odour has never been particulary strong. The only time it is is when I have a yeast infection. FWIW, I read somewhere that vaginal cleaning products like Summer’s Eve and soap may cause vaginal infections, because they mess with the natural balance of bateria in the vagina. I don’t have a cite for this, but if I find one I will post it. I think that your disgust (not meant to sound harsh:) ) for vaginal odour will fade with time. Perhaps if you gave it a shot again you would find that it’s not nearly as bad as you have made it out in your head. A bad experience tends to stick in the mind, but remember not to let one bad egg ruin the whole basket. Of course, if you ever need to practice, just email me. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/66 "2003-05-04T04:39:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lorinada \* > \*\*It doesn’t turn me off, it just simply does not turn me on. I don’t avoid it, I just don’t encourage it. It may be becuase I’ve never been brought to orgasm that way. I guess I have a “tough” clit that can only be stimulated manually - a tongue is way too “soft” to even arouse me. It may be that I love face-to-face sex play, and not only is cunnilingus not face-to-face, but since I find the odor it leaves on my partner’s face objectionable it kills any further face-to-face play. That plus the fact that the only “feeling” I get out of it is that I’m being slobbered on. \*\* Aha, that explains it, I’m the exact opposite. There are times when I’m saying “Ooo easy, careful, softer!!!” and my poor bf is saying “I’m barely touching you as it is”. Sometimes I’m so sensitive that his tongue is just too much for me as well. On the other hand, he doesn’t have to work very hard. LOL ---
**Author:** ![DougC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@DougC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DougC)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 10:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/67 "2003-05-04T10:44:29Z")
- - - What I’d like to know is the stats on this thread: has it been viewed more by women or men?.. ~ ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/68 "2003-05-04T13:06:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CanvasShoes \* > \*\* > So, if you expect a woman to approach sex with the “well, I can do without BJ’s, regular sex and cuddling is good enough” and expect HER to feel the same way? > > You better be DAMN good at other forms of sex and foreplay, or you’re going to have a hard time finding cheerfully willing partners. > > How bout this? If and when you find another LTR, start out S-L-O-W-L-Y reacquainting yourself with how a woman smells. Enlist her help. She might be a bit put off by what you are feeling now, but she’ll likely be even more put off if she can’t figure out why a nice guy doesn’t want to pleasure her in the most exquisite way a man can. > \*\* Well, thanx for your input. I _am_ considered pretty damn good at “other forms of sex and foreplay.” I am not exaggerating, bragging, or making this up. More than one woman has volunteered that opinion, unasked. To answer your question, I’m 2 months shy of 27. How old are you? And why did you want to know? ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2003, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/69 "2003-05-04T18:33:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lorinada \* > \*\*It doesn’t turn me off, it just simply does not turn me on. I don’t avoid it, I just don’t encourage it. It may be becuase I’ve never been brought to orgasm that way. I guess I have a “tough” clit that can only be stimulated manually - a tongue is way too “soft” to even arouse me. It may be that I love face-to-face sex play, and not only is cunnilingus not face-to-face, but since I find the odor it leaves on my partner’s face objectionable it kills any further face-to-face play. That plus the fact that the only “feeling” I get out of it is that I’m being slobbered on. \*\* At the risk of sounding arrogant, I’d have to say they’re doing it wrong. Unless your clit is so “tough” that it has to be pounded on in order to respond, it is almost certainly possible for a man (or woman) to stimulate it sufficiently with their mouth, given the right techiniques. First, of course, it should already be aroused, by manual means, before even heading down there. Once it is, it should be more responsive than if they just start in orally. And, there are lots of things one can do with a clit besides gently lapping it like an ice cream cone, and some of them provide a _much_ more intense sensation. It can be sucked, which many women respond very well to. It can be gently, or maybe not so gently, in your case, nibbled, or scraped with the teeth. It can be ground against the pubic bone, using the lips. And, if sucked into the mouth, a whole lot of pressure can be brought to bear, using the tongue. And, there’s no reason why your lover can’t alternate between oral and manual stimulation. Or, even combine the two. Of course, none of this overcomes your other objections. But, if you’re curious about why other women rave about oral sex, you could suggest your lover try some, or all, of these techniques, and see if they work for you. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2003, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/70 "2003-05-05T17:25:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Davebear \* > \*\*At the risk of sounding arrogant, I’d have to say they’re doing it wrong. Unless your clit is so “tough” that it has to be pounded on in order to respond, it is almost certainly possible for a man (or woman) to stimulate it sufficiently with their mouth, given the right techiniques. \*\* Some people truly aren’t turned on by oral stimulation, in any form. That doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with them, or that anybody is doing anything the wrong way. As analogy, consider that left-handed people make up only 10% of the population, but that doesn’t make them freaks. If she doesn’t like oral, then she doesn’t like oral. There is no reason to _make_ oneself like something that truly doesn’t bring them pleasure, as long as their partners are satisfied. Otherwise, sex is about as much fun as going to work. ---
**Author:** ![BottledBlondJeanie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/0ea827/32.png) [@BottledBlondJeanie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BottledBlondJeanie)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2003, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/71 "2003-05-05T21:37:27Z")
FWIW If it smells ‘fishy’ at all there is something wrong down there. You/she most likely has bacterial vaginosis… or even possibly trichomoniasis (pretty sure that’s spelled wrong). One’s due to an overgrowth of bacteria that normally reside in the vagina, the other is caused by a tiny organism. Both are easily treatable with a certain form of antibiotic. Again, if it’s ‘fishy’ there is something wrong with it. If it’s just good 'ol stanky stuff she probably just needs a shower and it’s good to go. As a woman who loves to receive oral sex I am always HIGHLY awre of what I smell and taste like, but some women are horrified by the ‘ick’ factor and don’t check those things out regularly. ---
**Author:** ![BottledBlondJeanie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/0ea827/32.png) [@BottledBlondJeanie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BottledBlondJeanie)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2003, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/72 "2003-05-05T21:38:59Z")
Ohh and **Lizard** you’ll get over it much faster if you stop calling it ‘eating her out.’ That is just crude. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2003, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/73 "2003-05-05T22:23:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by BottledBlondJeanie \* > \*\*Ohh and **Lizard** you’ll get over it much faster if you stop calling it ‘eating her out.’ That is just crude. \*\* I’ve posted to this thread at least 10 times, and I’ve used that expression _once_. So, :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![BytopianDream](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9de0a6/32.png) [@BytopianDream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BytopianDream)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/74 "2003-05-06T07:52:28Z")
I’d say you are missing out on a great bit of fun. If you hit the clit \*just[/] right, its like riding a roller-coaster. **Whee** as she screams and bucks… Now that is cool. And the _look_ she gives you when you are done… You just know you are going to get laid for like weeks afterwards. If she smells/tastes bad, gently wash her with a clean, warm water wash cloth. And tell her, “Its not your normal taste/smell, because you have been working too much/stressed out too much/blah blah… But I can help you fix that.” And you don’t have to stick your tongue up the vaginal canal (where the Little Captain goes). Licking the clit and labia minora/majora (the pouty lips) will do a great deal of good. In fact, I hardly ever tongue in the vaginal canal. It also helps that I don’t mind a little blood or irony smell/taste. Women find it incredibly super sexy that I go down during mestruation (when her evil friends Pam Mary and Sally come over). I always say that orgasms help cramps and PMS… Seems to work. And… dude… If oral sex isn’t the bomb-diggitity-iggity-iggity-izzibilitityizzzity-bomB!!! You ain’t getting it right. But, I feel your pain. Only two lovers ever made me orgasm orally. One only once. The other realized that I had some brain block that kept me from enjoying it (Thanks Parental/Religious Guilt). After she broke that from me… WOW!!! The orgasm is like ten to twenty times more intense than an intercourse orgasm. Plus (Don’t mind me, Its too late and I’m getting slap happy), sex doesn’t have to always be about love and intimacy and a very special “Dawson’s Creek” stuff. Good sex can be nasty and fun and goofy and funny and evilly good. Have fun with sex. It’s adult play time. Cuddling is great. But so is a quickie against the fridge. Have fun and explore. Lighten up. Enjoy yourself and your love interest. Relax… I say again… Relax. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/75 "2003-05-06T16:30:05Z")
Thanks **BytopianDream** , for one of the most incomprehensible, but funny, posts in a long time. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![six-o](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@six-o](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/six-o)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/76 "2003-05-06T18:23:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Davebear \* > \*\*It’s also possible that the woman who turned you off to the act smelled “too familiar”. Recent studies have shown that families have distinctive scents that are passed on through the generations. They also showed that people are programmed to find this familial scent repulsive when combined with sexual feelings. Nature’s way of saying “don’t mess with your sister”. So, it’s possible the woman you mentioned smelled too much like a member of your family. > \*\* This is intriguing but disturbing. Any ideas where you got this info? I’d be interested in reading it. ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/77 "2003-05-06T23:45:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lizard \* > \*\*Some people truly aren’t turned on by oral stimulation, in any form. That doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with them, or that anybody is doing anything the wrong way. As analogy, consider that left-handed people make up only 10% of the population, but that doesn’t make them freaks. > > If she doesn’t like oral, then she doesn’t like oral. There is no reason to _make_ oneself like something that truly doesn’t bring them pleasure, as long as their partners are satisfied. Otherwise, sex is about as much fun as going to work. \*\* I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t quote me out of context, leaving out the relevant parts. I also said; > [@](#): > > Of course, none of this overcomes your other objections. But, if you’re curious about why other women rave about oral sex, you could suggest your lover try some, or all, of these techniques, and see if they work for you. She didn’t say she didn’t like it. She basically said she was neutral towards it. And, I was suggesting that she might be able to enjoy it, under the right circumstances. What’s wrong with that? Just because _you_ don’t like it, doesn’t mean _she_ should have to miss out. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by six-o \* > \*\*This is intriguing but disturbing. Any ideas where you got this info? I’d be interested in reading it. \*\* Well, it was relatively recent. Within, say, the last six months to a year. I _think_ it was referenced in an article in Smithsonian. But, I can never find anything in their search engine, and I don’t keep back issues. But, why do you find it disturbing? ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/78 "2003-05-07T08:10:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lizard \* > \*\*Well, thanx for your input. I _am_ considered pretty damn good at “other forms of sex and foreplay.” I am not exaggerating, bragging, or making this up. More than one woman has volunteered that opinion, unasked. > > To answer your question, I’m 2 months shy of 27. How old are you? And why did you want to know? \*\* I’m REaaaaaLLY old. (just turned 44). I was just curious. I thought you were probably at least mid-twenties, but based on some of your discomfort, was wondering if you might have been a bit younger. Some younger guys can be a bit squeamish about giving oral sex. And I’m not saying that in a bad way. Women who are less experienced can be the same way. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 8:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/79 "2003-05-07T08:21:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CanvasShoes \* > \*\*I’m REaaaaaLLY old. (just turned 44). I was just curious. I thought you were probably at least mid-twenties, but based on some of your discomfort, was wondering if you might have been a bit younger. Some younger guys can be a bit squeamish about giving oral sex. And I’m not saying that in a bad way. Women who are less experienced can be the same way. \*\* Except I’m not that young. So what does that tell you? You’re not THAT old. I lost my virginity with a woman a few years older than you. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375/80 "2003-05-07T08:29:54Z")
It tells me that you’re about a year older than my boyfriend was when I begin dating him. I was 37 at the time. I have nothing against younger men at all (obviously hehe). I just know from talking to friends and acquaintances that occasionally young people go through that sort of “phase”. As I said, I had guessed you for older, but asked because if you HAD been younger, and perhaps feeling that squeamishness, hopefully I could have helped a little by telling you it would pass. As you said in one of your other posts though, you sound pretty darn good at pleasing a woman in other ways. I have to admit, my bf is pretty creative and doesn’t really need to go down on me to be really really good in bed. I do know a few women who don’t like it. So, if you do find out that you just aren’t getting over the distaste for it, I don’t think you’ll have much trouble. Plus, you sound really nice, and willing to communicate. That’s worth a LOT! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/women-oral-sex-and-vaginal-odor-am-i-the-only-one-that-cares-possible-tmi/172375.md?page=5)