# WOOHOO! We've Got A Turkey On The Way! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 4, 2005, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715 "2005-04-04T18:59:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/21 "2005-04-05T01:15:49Z")
Congratulations. Good luck on your new adventure. šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/22 "2005-04-05T12:49:16Z")
Congratulations. Make sure you remember to baste said turkey frequently. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/23 "2005-04-05T13:00:28Z")
_Roseanne_, looking at sister Jackieā€™s nine-month-swollen stomach, touches Jackieā€™s navel and says ā€œMaybe when this pops up, itā€™s done.ā€ ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/24 "2005-04-05T13:05:34Z")
Congratulations! ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/25 "2005-04-05T14:13:47Z")
Very cool. As a sometimes-on-Thanksgiving birthday myself, may I hereby request on **Halkitten** ā€™s behalf that you always be sure to serve both birthday cake \*and \*(if you must) pumpkin pie? _grumbles_ Hate pumpkin pie. Stupid pumpkin pie looks stupid with stupid birthday candles in it. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/26 "2005-04-05T15:37:21Z")
Thanks much, all! **Draelin** - So, no change from the usual, then? **silenus** - **kitten** got a hella laugh out of that oneā€¦too much of a laugh, ifā€™n ya ask me. **harmless** - \ **lieu** - Very, very, very, very wrong. And funny. **Tupug** - Hehā€¦temptingā€¦but itā€™s already my brotherā€™s name. **VunderBob** - \ Sorryā€¦donā€™t geddit. **Casey** - Better believe it! Elsewise, weā€™ll just have to wheel a TV into the delivery room. **Loach** - Tell me 'bout it. But if we move, itā€™ll be a lot further than PA. **WhyNot** - Hey, I can cover two topics at once with [this](http://www.inktank.com/AT/index.cfm?nav=473). ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/27 "2005-04-05T15:47:55Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > **WhyNot** - Hey, I can cover two topics at once with [this](http://www.inktank.com/AT/index.cfm?nav=473). Grrā€¦ covering two topics at once is the _problem_, bub! šŸ˜ƒ Keep the birthday and the bird-day as separate as possible! (Actually, I thought that was very funny. Thanks!) ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/28 "2005-04-05T16:07:24Z")
Way to stuff that bird! ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/29 "2005-04-05T16:27:33Z")
> [@Zebra](#): > > Way to stuff that bird! Funny lineā€¦and itā€™ll be even funnier if you happen to be from the UK. šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/30 "2005-04-05T16:55:44Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > Thanks much, all! > **VunderBob** - \ Sorryā€¦donā€™t geddit. I presume you mean the proposed name for a girl. Jenny-O is a brand name of turkey sold in the midwestā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/31 "2005-04-05T17:00:00Z")
> [@VunderBob](#): > > Jenny-O is a brand name of turkey sold in the midwestā€¦ Ahhh, gotcha. Yeah, East-coaster hereā€¦that went zipping right by me. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/32 "2005-04-05T17:08:11Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > Ahhh, gotcha. Yeah, East-coaster hereā€¦that went zipping right by me. Thank you for asking, I didnā€™t get it either. šŸ™‚ And Iā€™m sure you already give your wife anything she wants ā€¦ but you should be ready for middle-of-the-night ice-cream-retrieval ops anyway. Rememberā€“itā€™s all _your_ fault. šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/33 "2005-04-05T17:25:39Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > Funny lineā€¦and itā€™ll be even funnier if you happen to be from the UK. šŸ™‚ Iā€™m not from the UK but I do watch BBC America a lot. Will you kidā€™s sig be ā€˜Smart, Hip, Drumstickā€™? ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/34 "2005-04-05T17:37:44Z")
Congrats! Having kids is so much fun! Really.They are the Zen Masters of Life. I poop you not! Most importantly, and for sheer hilarity in the future, I want you and your wife to seperately write down on paper the **10 things we will never do/my child will never do** list. Donā€™t look at eachotherā€™s list. Thatā€™s cheating. It is important to do this now while your thoughts are still pure and you beleive you have the power to bend your childs will just because you are DAD/MOM and Tyranny is Mine! you know: My child will never be seen in public with a runny nose. My child will never have a temper tantrum in public or say ā€˜Noā€™ to me evar. My child will never have one of those koolaid stained smiles in public. My child will never wear velcro tennis shoes, they will learn to tie just like I did. My kids will not wear buttugly t-shirts that have an enormous spiderman/spongebob/pokemon/barbie/strawberry shortcake on them. We will have calm, reasonable conversations at the dinner table to instill family values. sorry, but if DAD is involved in Dinner Time Meals it .ainā€™t.gonna.happen. And the favorite: I will not turn into my mother/father. Good luck with that! Etc. etc. etc. Then look at it on your precious childā€™s 5th birthday, or better yet, their graduation. You will laugh until you cry. What is the projected due date of your little bird? Your wife will be feeling tired and crappy for three months. This is an excellent time to score some massive brownie points in doing your much belated Honey-do list. ( you wanker!) šŸ™‚ Naturally, it is expected we get to do a Name The Baby thread. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/35 "2005-04-05T20:19:07Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > Thanks much, all! > > [ **Loach** - Tell me 'bout it. But if we move, itā€™ll be a lot further than PA. Not possible for me because of my job but we are moving to Hunderton County this month. Going from having our kitchen window 12 feet from our neighbors bedroom to having over 3 acres. Yippee. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/36 "2005-04-05T20:29:41Z")
Congratulations, **Hal**. All of the good turkey jokes are already taken. šŸ˜‰ > [@Loach](#): > > Not possible for me because of my job but we are moving to Hunderton County this month. Going from having our kitchen window 12 feet from our neighbors bedroom to having over 3 acres. Yippee. Congrats to you too, **Loach**. Itā€™s nice to hear that Hunterdon hasnā€™t been built out twelve ways for Tuesday the way Mercer and Burlington went. ---
**Author:** ![Grasshopper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f19dbf/32.png) [@Grasshopper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grasshopper)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/37 "2005-04-05T22:24:01Z")
Hooray, Hal and kittenlm! New life is so exciting šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2005, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/38 "2005-04-05T22:55:42Z")
Congrats on the little Butterball! The fun part will be when you take a pic of him/her beside the Thanksgiving turkey, just for comparison purposes. For even more fun, put big goofy sunglasses on both the kid and the turkey. Good times! ---
**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2005, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/39 "2005-04-06T07:27:34Z")
Yay for Baby Briston! Congratulation to the both of you! Yay! ---
**Author:** ![phall0106](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phall0106/32/5934_2.png) [@phall0106](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phall0106)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2005, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715/40 "2005-04-06T13:36:13Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > Now you have to move. Itā€™s too crowded around here as it is. I hear Pennsylvania is nice. Who have YOU been talking to? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woohoo-weve-got-a-turkey-on-the-way/297715.md?page=3)