# Words that don't exist but should. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 13, 2004, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056 "2004-02-13T16:26:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2004, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/81 "2004-03-22T21:05:52Z")
Ah, sniglets. [http://almavijai.sphosting.com/Sniglets/sniglets.html](http://almavijai.sphosting.com/Sniglets/sniglets.html) I absotively, posilutely love sniglets! ---
**Author:** ![h.sapiens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e0b2c6/32.png) [@h.sapiens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/h.sapiens)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2004, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/82 "2004-03-22T21:33:53Z")
**Neologology** : the study of neologisms. Example: This thread is an excercise in neologology. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2004, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/83 "2004-03-22T21:39:11Z")
**Porndering** : Trying to deduce what the _other_ customers in the adult novelty shop are there to get. **Dopacetic** : When all your work for the day is done and you can surf the boards till quittin’ time. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2004, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/84 "2004-03-22T21:49:22Z")
**threasurrection** - You thought the thread was dead, but surprise! It’s back! ---
**Author:** ![cbawlmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@cbawlmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cbawlmer)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2004, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/85 "2004-03-22T22:15:40Z")
A friend of mine once coined “I under-get-it” as a response to someone stumbling over a series of words that never quite make it out, but the meaning is clear. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2004, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/86 "2004-03-22T23:48:29Z")
> [@raizok](#): > > A buddy of mine once got into a heavy makeout session with this chick and she gave him a handjob through his pants. To this day I have referred to it as a “cottonjob” since nothing was actually outside of his underwear. That word really bugs him 😃 but everyone else I know loves it 🙂 That already has a word, and a lovely one when properly pronounced with a soft g: frottage. ---
**Author:** ![mascaroni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@mascaroni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mascaroni)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/87 "2004-03-23T00:55:11Z")
**Audient:** The singular of audience; what you get when you take your crap late seventies ska band to a pub in the middle of nowhere and the single person who walks in has left his dog at home… I know GWB takes a pasting off of many on here, but there is no doubt that he has empoored the Enlish language. The trouble is, most people misunderestimisate him… ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/88 "2004-03-23T00:56:25Z")
**D’OH!per** - what a long-time SDMB poster is when s/he does something stupid like forgetting to search threads before asking a question that’s been covered in the Forum Sticky, or posting to the wrong forum, and the like. Not like anyone in this reply box would actually have done anything listed above in only the first week back on the boards after a long hiatus… ---
**Author:** ![mascaroni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@mascaroni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mascaroni)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/89 "2004-03-23T00:57:07Z")
**Enlish:** Another word for the English. Common among those who don’t preview their posts. ---
**Author:** ![midwestern\_nuttygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@midwestern\_nuttygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/midwestern_nuttygirl)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/90 "2004-03-23T02:53:38Z")
> [@FilmGeek](#): > > In our house we say: > > **Assident** - when you fart and _almost_ shit your pants. > > **Assplosion** - explosive diarrhea, of course. Diarrhea= Ass Vomit Hemorrhoids= Hangeroids A couple of my favorite euphamisms for moving one’s bowels are: 1. Launching a rocket 2. Growing a tail It’s funny how humans are compelled to be creative when talking about a seemingly uncomfortable, yet completely natural subject. I, for one, find it a hilarious topic of discussion and will join in at every opportunity!!! ---
**Author:** ![drewbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drewbert/32/15890_2.png) [@drewbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewbert)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/91 "2004-03-23T02:56:29Z")
**Fruitile** - Futile and fruitless (credit my parents) **Ambiphibuous** - Able to drink with either hand (credit my grandpa) **Wussitudinosity** - Referring to the condition of being a wuss (yours truly) ---
**Author:** ![mascaroni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@mascaroni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mascaroni)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/92 "2004-03-23T03:05:35Z")
> [@drewbert](#): > > **Ambiphibuous** - Able to drink with either hand (credit my grandpa) You’ve just given me another goal in life… ---
**Author:** ![hammerbach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/73ab20/32.png) [@hammerbach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hammerbach)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/93 "2004-03-23T07:03:08Z")
For all of those Douglas Adams fans out there: [_The Meaning Of Liff_](http://folk.uio.no/alied/TMoL.html) ---
**Author:** ![Fkia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/46a35a/32.png) [@Fkia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fkia)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/94 "2004-03-23T14:29:11Z")
These are all good words, but too many of them are either a melding of existing words or just plain Orwellian. What we need are entirely new words, like: Arsesia - That condition of the eyes after a particularly good sneeze. Warkling - Eating out when you know you can’t afford it, really. Sampone - The poor explaination you give for mistakenly kissing a stranger. Criving - Telling someone that they have food in their teeth. Tredlion - The garnish on the plate that looks more appetizing than the actual entre. Orphofantic - Unconcerned with the amount of shop grease under one’s fingernails. Spliddle - Coffee induced twitch. Depnear - The wet spot on your pillow in the morning with many possible origins. Smong - A tomato that has a split in the skin. Frablous - Loving anything to do with the “Atkins” diet. Samling - Being bombarded constantly with reminders of the “Atkins” diet in advertising. Blaiderous - Beginning to hate anything to do with the “Atkins” diet. Drigerous - Wishing Dr. Atkins was still alive so that you could put him on a pornographic mailing list, infesting his house with rabid dung beetles or something equally horrific for inflicting his commercially friendly “diet” upon the world. Gradernious - Tired from typing too much early in the morning. Yup ---
**Author:** ![Palantir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e36b37/32.png) [@Palantir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palantir)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/95 "2004-03-23T19:18:38Z")
> [@kung fu lola](#): > > Theterosexual for someone who is heterosexual in _theory_, but not in practice. Like Madonna. > > Sensuexual. It means like it sounds. Sen-shoo-ex-shue-uhl. My circle uses Homoflexual for people who have a preference for a particular sex but will sleep with either. Antibanting - one who is not following the Atkins diet. from William Banting a London undertaker who popularised an almost all meat diet in the mid 19thC ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/96 "2004-03-23T20:48:21Z")
> [@TellMeI'mNotCrazy](#): > > Napjerk: That sudden jerking movement your body makes just as you’re drifting off to sleep. Actually, that already has a name: it’s called a [myoclonic jerk](http://www.faqs.org/faqs/dreams-faq/part2/section-5.html). That said, I’ll add **headbob** as both a noun and verb for the act of falling slowly asleep in your chair until your head suddenly falls forwards or backwards and wakes you up. Also, the spouse and I call any hand-pushed cart, trolley, etc with a squeaky wheel an **eeky** due to the noise it makes (_eeky eeky eeky eeky…_). ---
**Author:** ![SpectBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a87d85/32.png) [@SpectBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpectBrain)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/97 "2004-03-23T23:20:40Z")
**Pedzing** A place in the road where people walk in front of your car. **Nipply** cold as in “It’s a tit bit nipply out there”. (thanks to my dafter for that one 🙂 . Oh **dafter** because daughter should rhyme with laughter and my daughter would drive me daft! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/98 "2004-03-23T23:37:28Z")
> [@SpectBrain](#): > > **Nipply** cold as in “It’s a tit bit nipply out there”. (thanks to my dafter for that one 🙂 . Oh **dafter** because daughter should rhyme with laughter and my daughter would drive me daft! 😃 As long as you don’t slafter her aughterwards. ---
**Author:** ![Cranky\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/13edae/32.png) [@Cranky\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cranky_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/99 "2004-03-24T02:30:34Z")
Stupidiots. Stupid idiots-obvious. ---
**Author:** ![Cranky\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/13edae/32.png) [@Cranky\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cranky_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056/100 "2004-03-24T02:38:56Z")
> [@Myron Van Horowitzski](#): > > [Do too](http://dictionary.reference.com/search?r=2&q=popliteal), actually. I like kneepit better-certainly more rememberable! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-that-dont-exist-but-should/229056.md?page=6)