# Words you intentionally mispronounce for humor reasons **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 12, 2013, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122 "2013-02-12T21:36:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/61 "2013-02-13T16:55:38Z")
“Nithulanian” instead of “Lithuanian,” as in _The Music Man_, when someone refers to poor Tommy Djilas, whose father is “one of those Nithulanians lives out south of town.” ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/62 "2013-02-13T17:12:17Z")
Worcestershire sauce is whazzizhere suace. We frequently whet our appetites with horseovaries. I am posting to y’all over the intartoobz. The big box in the kitchen that keeps food cold is the refrigidaireator. Florida is Floriduh. Georgia is Jawja. The Carolinas are the Keeroliners. I’m a walking mispronunciation guide. ---
**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/63 "2013-02-13T17:12:18Z")
I say “roof” like “ruff” because it sounds a little more Canadian. Also: Kuh-nife, Skizzors, po-leece and of course “Amber Lamps” for ambulance. ---
**Author:** ![SpoilerVirgin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4491bb/32.png) [@SpoilerVirgin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpoilerVirgin)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/64 "2013-02-13T17:52:02Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > What I’ve picked up through my late father-in-law: Goatmeal (oatmeal) How could I forget goatmeal? I eat it all the time. > [@mage-girl](#): > > Also, February is “Feh-BOO-ary”. That might not be quite so weird though. I say Fuh - BREWery, like it was a beer brewing month. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/65 "2013-02-13T18:11:48Z")
> [@SCAdian](#): > > I pronounce it as if it were an Italian word: ahm-boo-LAHN-chay. I call it a bambilance, considering all the deer I’ve hit while driving one. The nut is a PEE-can, not a puh-CAHN. Another one for the little dog being a Cha-hoo-a-hoo-a; sometimes I use SHE-wah-wah. Hors d’ouerves are horse doovers. The discount store is Tarzhey. In our house, we eat skabetty ‘n’ meatballs. My son, as a pre-schooler, insisted the first meal of the day is brefkist. The name has stuck. When I was little, the things that cleaned the windshiled of rain were windmill shwipers, and that name stuck around until I was out of college. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/66 "2013-02-13T18:19:01Z")
I once met a crusty Marine who made a comment about the Cadillac SUV, the “Es-ka-lady.” It still cracks me up, but I don’t think I’ve ever had an opportunity to use it. ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/67 "2013-02-13T19:00:52Z")
Mosquito and pterodactyl are ‘mosquinto’ and ‘petridactyl’ respectively. I also use Les Nessman’s ‘chihooahooah’ pronunciation from time to time. ---
**Author:** ![Terra1041](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Terra1041](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terra1041)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/68 "2013-02-13T19:09:39Z")
I sometimes will spell out Roman numerals. “Yeah, I’m watching Star Wars Episode Vee” instead of five. Related: I might say Mac OS X as “Mack Oss Ecks”. As a non-fan of Apple, I like to annoy the iFanatics. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/69 "2013-02-13T19:11:55Z")
_K-niggits_. As in “You so-called Arthur King and your silly English k-niggits!” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/70 "2013-02-13T19:13:56Z")
New Orleans is _N’Awlins_, which is how _they_ say it. Same with _Joisey_ for New Jersey. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/71 "2013-02-13T19:16:56Z")
_Herr Hilter_, as in “Hilter ist gut für Minehead!” ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/72 "2013-02-13T19:19:23Z")
I don’t actually do it but I have an urge to pronounce “Celebrate” like a cross between Latin and Elvish, i.e. Kell-uh-BRAH-tay. ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/73 "2013-02-13T19:27:23Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > New Orleans is _N’Awlins_, which is how _they_ say it. > > Same with _Joisey_ for New Jersey. NOBODY from New Jersey says “Joisey.” It’s a NY thing. ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/74 "2013-02-13T19:38:48Z")
Heimlich Maneuver = “hymen remover”. ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/75 "2013-02-13T19:45:10Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > Worcestershire sauce is whazzizhere suace. I pronounce it the way it SHOULD be pronounced (wer-ches-ter-shure). Sometimes I even add another superfluous syllable to the end (wer-ches-ter-shure-shure). ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/76 "2013-02-13T19:47:07Z")
> [@MLS](#): > > NOBODY from New Jersey says “Joisey.” It’s a NY thing. Yeah, like “Hurt is hoyt!” and “New Greenpernt.” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/77 "2013-02-13T19:50:02Z")
Those noble Greeks, So-Crates and Hippo-Crates (I don’t know how Bill and Ted pronounced them) ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/78 "2013-02-13T20:11:13Z")
> [@Ponch8](#): > > Sometimes I even add another superfluous syllable to the end (wer-ches-ter-shure-shure). Same here – War Chester Shire Sheer sauce. I think I heard that one from a TV show, but my memory fails me. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/79 "2013-02-13T21:01:16Z")
> [@moejoe](#): > > This, and also para-dig-um When I first learned of that word I looked up the proper pronunciation and waited until the day I could use it. But my mother beat me to it and pronounced it “para-didj-um” and then the opportunity arose for me to use it and I, of course, pronounced it the way she did. When I was corrected I said, “yeah, I knew that. My mother screwed me up.” Which turns out to be the answer for a lot of things. > [@terentii](#): > > _K-niggits_. As in “You so-called Arthur King and your silly English k-niggits!” This is what I intended to post. ---
**Author:** ![Cryptic\_C62](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Cryptic\_C62](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cryptic_C62)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/80 "2013-02-13T21:09:21Z")
I like going up to cashiers and saying “Hello. I would like to purchass these itehms.” Not once have I ever gotten a weird look for it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122.md?page=5)