# Words you intentionally mispronounce for humor reasons **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 12, 2013, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122 "2013-02-12T21:36:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/81 "2013-02-13T21:42:48Z")
Fajitas is pronounced fuh-JITE-is. From my son when he was a wee lad…the stuff one cleans one’s teeth with is pooptaste. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/82 "2013-02-13T21:46:25Z")
Rectum? Damn near killed 'im! ---
**Author:** ![Bones\_Daley](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@Bones\_Daley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bones_Daley)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/83 "2013-02-13T22:15:28Z")
I always mispronounce “calibre” as “kah-LYE-ber” …sometimes people pick up on it, more often they don’t …I always wonder if they are asking themselves …" maybe that \*\*\*is \*\*\*the correct pronunciation " … ---
**Author:** ![Bumbershoot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbershoot/32/3428_2.png) [@Bumbershoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbershoot)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/84 "2013-02-13T22:17:32Z")
There was an episode of Sanford & Son where Fred called hors d’oeuvres “horse divers”. Lamont said something like “It’s French. It’s pronounced ‘hoors dee ovrays’.” So that’s how I say it. I also say “Mucho garcia” for “Muchas gracias” and, with a heavy southern accent, “Oh contrayer, moan amee!” ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/85 "2013-02-13T22:41:59Z")
_Muchas gracias_ is Mucus Garcias. There’s a NY bread company, Ecce Panis, which my dad called Icky Penis. [Horse Doovers](http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lo4n1jKkon1qdq1qh.jpg) was around in 1939, per this picture from San Francisco. [Charles Krauthammer](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/06/10/charles-krauthammer-fox-n_n_213723.html) is Charles Coathanger, because he frequently looks as though he’s left it in his suit jacket. ---
**Author:** ![LawMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/86 "2013-02-13T23:03:49Z")
Well, there’s the entire French language, which I am most assuredly not fluent in, nor do I have even a passing familiarity with the rules of pronunciation of. I tend to pronounce it with a heavy hillbilly/southern accent, rather like Lt. Aldo Raines saying “BONE JORE NO!” in _ **Ingluorious Basterds** _. I also like “beacuase” from the “[Dot Dot Dot](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Z2Z23SAFVA)” video, and “pengwine” / “Nelson Mandohla” from a certain _ **Mongrels** _ gag. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/87 "2013-02-13T23:06:01Z")
> [@california\_jobcase](#): > > I know plenty of people who earnestly believe there is an i after the v in mischievous. Even my fifth-grade teacher said so. Doesn’t mean they’re right. Thank you – I honestly never digested this. MISSchevus and not mis-chee-vee-ous for a reason!! This is right up there with when I realized I was saying comfterbuhl. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/88 "2013-02-14T00:29:37Z")
Very, _very_ un-PC, but ever since seeing [this comedy routine](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_L6IeH6KeaY) (when it originally aired on HBO in 1984), shoulder pads have been sholdamapads. When we were kids, one of my little sisters curiously quizzed us as to why there was a bath_room_, a bed_room_, a living_room_, a dining_room_, but we didn’t call it a kitch_room_. Naturally, I’ve called it a kitchroom my whole life since then. When **Spiny Norman** and I first got married, since he’d never heard it spoken and only read it in print, he pronounced the word “cabinet” as if it were French: cabin_ay_. You know, like buffet? So of course our kitchroom is now full of cabinays. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SerafinaPekala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@SerafinaPekala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SerafinaPekala)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/89 "2013-02-14T03:32:32Z")
Wunderbob I call it a Bambilance too. An EMT friend got a frantic call once from a guy calling in to send teh “bambilance” cuz he just hit a deer. I thought it was really pronounced “wers-deh-sheer” sauce … ? But I call it “werchestershire” just to annoy ppl. And “cahmPORtable” means comfortable. We used to giggle at one of our English-as-a-second-language nursing instructors who would always ask our patients if they were “cahmPORtable” (checking up on us). Medical industry is so ripe for mispronunciations and jokes about it, since so many non-English speaking interns are training in hospitals I work at. Examples: “Oo get the Walium (Valium)! … He is in PeeWeeCee’s now(PVCs) … Ve’re in de major wessel (vessel) now”. Nurses are so unforgiving. ---
**Author:** ![janis\_and\_c0](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/janis_and_c0/32/21_2.png) [@janis\_and\_c0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/janis_and_c0)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/90 "2013-02-14T04:37:47Z")
> [@Bumbershoot](#): > > _snip_ > I also say “Mucho garcia” for “Muchas gracias” and, with a heavy southern accent, “Oh contrayer, moan amee!” Muchas gracias is another one of mine, I say Much Grass instead. Similarly, I often say fangs instead of thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/91 "2013-02-14T04:50:23Z")
> [@janis\_and\_c0](#): > > Muchas gracias is another one of mine, I say Much Grass instead. Similarly, I often say fangs instead of thanks. The spouse and I say “mini fangs” for “many thanks.” Reminds us of kittens. We like kittens. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![dnooman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/839c29/32.png) [@dnooman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dnooman)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/92 "2013-02-14T05:38:00Z")
I like to call Dutch people Hollish for humor reasons alone. I also call it a FOY-yer on purpose too. For some reason I can’t bring myself to pronounce croissant properly, I have to say it like a cretin and say cruh-SAWNT. I also say JYE-ro just to irk people as well. ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/93 "2013-02-14T05:44:16Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > _Muchas gracias_ is Mucus Garcias. And the polite response to “Garcias” is… “de nalgas.” ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/94 "2013-02-14T05:54:13Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > [Horse Doovers](http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lo4n1jKkon1qdq1qh.jpg) was around in 1939, per this picture from San Francisco. I learned “horse doovers” from a _Punch_ cartoon. I saw the cartoon in the mid '60s, but I think it dated from the '30s or '40s. I say “Bum gerbils!” to mean _Buon giorno_ - got that from an old Navy buddy. And another Navy habit is to refer to the UAE port of Jebel Ali (near Dubai) as “Gerbil Alley.” ---
**Author:** ![Max\_the\_Immortal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Max\_the\_Immortal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_the_Immortal)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/95 "2013-02-14T06:04:20Z")
I pronounce typos according to their accidental spelling, Strong Bad style. ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/96 "2013-02-14T06:08:47Z")
Beyonce and diabeetus. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/97 "2013-02-14T06:21:28Z")
> [@rhubarbarin](#): > > diabeetus. Who is Wilford Brimley? What did I win? ---
**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/98 "2013-02-14T15:48:17Z")
I say “Ja-la-pen-ohs.” Pronouncing the “J”. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/99 "2013-02-14T15:51:53Z")
> [@Max\_the\_Immortal](#): > > I pronounce typos according to their accidental spelling, Strong Bad style. Especially if they have consummate V’s. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_the\_Immortal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Max\_the\_Immortal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_the_Immortal)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122/100 "2013-02-15T00:22:29Z")
> [@Max\_the\_Immortal](#): > > I pronounce typos according to their accidental spelling, Strong Bad style. Followup: Also, I give text-speak similar treatment. “Plz” becomes “pulzzzzzzzz”. The letter “u” subbed in for “you” becomes… well, imagine a gorilla going “Ooooo-ooooo-ooooo!”, but only one of them. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/words-you-intentionally-mispronounce-for-humor-reasons/650122.md?page=6)