# Wordsmiths: help me come up with a sign for Monday Night Football **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 15, 2009, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868 "2009-10-15T03:37:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Roland\_Orzabal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@Roland\_Orzabal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roland_Orzabal)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/1 "2009-10-15T03:37:47Z")
This weekend, I’ll be headed off to San Diego, where I have tickets for Monday Night Football. As this is for my traveling companion’s birthday, and quite likely a once-in-a-lifetime event, I sprung for field-level, front-row, 50-yard-line tickets. Clearly, this occasion necessitates the creation and display a of bigass sign bearing a witty initialism. …and therein lies the rub. My traveling companion, hereafter referred to as “my dad”, is an ex-advertising type, and I’m sure he’ll come up with something…but he hasn’t yet, and I don’t want to leave empty-handed (or empty-postered, as the case may be). Knowing that the Dope possesses a collective verbal jujitsu to put my own to shame — not something you’ll often find me conceding elsewhere — I turn to you and say, lend me your pens. Right then. The goal is to get my dad on TV by way of an appropriately whimsical sign. If you don’t already know how these work, the signs most likely to end up on TV seem to be comprised of initialisms derived from the station on which the game is being televised, or any special aspects of the game itself (such as **M** onday **N** ight **F** ootball). The terms themselves tend to be either generic support for one’s favored team/player, or disparaging remarks about the opponent. A rather uninspired example might be: Cowboys Butcher Steelers Additional “fill words” are acceptable as long as the general scheme is followed, eg: Nobody Beats the Colts So, here’s what I have to work with. The game is Monday Night Football on ESPN. We are supporting the San Diego Chargers, also known as the “Bolts” or “Thunderbolts” (real helpful, I know), who are playing the Denver Broncos. The two teams are rivals in the AFC West. A full Chargers roster can be found [here](http://www.chargers.com/team/roster.html). A few key players are Philip Rivers (QB), LaDainian Tomlinson (LT…er, RB), Darren Sproles (RB-KR), and Vincent Jackson (WR). I know there’s not a lot to go on, but that’s why I’m turning to the Dope. I know you won’t let me down. Once we’ve made our decision, I’ll post here to let you guys know what we went with, so those of you watching at home can easily spot us in all our blue-jersey’d beer-drinking glory! ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/2 "2009-10-15T04:21:21Z")
Late in the game, they usually show somebody with a “Sportscenter is Next” sign, which could also incorporate “Go 'Bolts” or some such… ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/3 "2009-10-15T04:39:35Z")
Moving thread from IMHO to Cafe Society. ---
**Author:** ![HongKongFooey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c4cdca/32.png) [@HongKongFooey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HongKongFooey)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/4 "2009-10-15T04:43:49Z")
Have you considered John 3:16? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![DanBlather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f4b2a3/32.png) [@DanBlather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DanBlather)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/5 "2009-10-15T07:27:36Z")
**M** y **N** uts are **F** rozen Or tape a pregnancy test stick to a sign saying **N** o **B** aby **C** oming ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/6 "2009-10-15T09:30:58Z")
“Hank Williams Jr.” with the universal symbol for “no” around it (red circle with line through it.) ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/7 "2009-10-15T17:46:10Z")
Two choices here: 1. It never rains in California; man it POURS! \<–just in case it’s raining. 2. **E** very **S** portsCenter **P** lay **N** ext ---
**Author:** ![garygnu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garygnu/32/2924_2.png) [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/8 "2009-10-15T17:57:23Z")
Those Bronco uniforms are **M** oronic **N** auseating **F** ugly ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/9 "2009-10-15T18:04:29Z")
I think you should just do a Dope shout out and carry a sign that says “Cite?” and go stand next to people with signs that say stuff like “Bronco’s Rule!”. Or get a pic of a cute kitty (wearing your team’s helmet) and have the sign say “I can haz win?” Okay, I spend too much time on the internet. ---
**Author:** ![kenner116](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecb155/32.png) [@kenner116](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenner116)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/10 "2009-10-15T18:23:45Z")
Epileptic Sproles Promotes Narcolepsy ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/11 "2009-10-15T19:54:15Z")
**E** lectric **S** proles **P** owers **N** orv ? ---
**Author:** ![picker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/picker/32/13969_2.png) [@picker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picker)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/12 "2009-10-15T20:09:04Z")
Every Sportsfan’s Perfect Night ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/13 "2009-10-15T20:15:26Z")
**E** very **S** mall **P** enis…No, that’s no good. **M** en **N** osh **F** rankfurters… **E** vil **S** ign **P** ainters **N** egotiate…😕 Aw, forget it. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/14 "2009-10-15T20:19:34Z")
“Hit A Home Run!” Thus showing you’re too cool to actually know the rules of the game you paid to see. ---
**Author:** ![Roland\_Orzabal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@Roland\_Orzabal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roland_Orzabal)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/15 "2009-10-16T17:02:30Z")
Looks like my dad came through. For the curious, we may go with any or all of the following. General-purpose team support: **E** ngage **S** uper Charger “ **P** hil-osophy” **N** ow For when Turner gets a little too run-happy on third and long: **E** verybody **S** ay “ **P** ass **N** orv!” To gloat when we go ahead: **E** xpect **S** ome **P** ostseason **N** ow ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/16 "2009-10-16T17:25:18Z")
I suppose having What’s the **E** astern **S** eaboard **P** rogramming **N** etwork Doing here? wouldn’t be such a good idea. ---
**Author:** ![TheBoltEater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/779978/32.png) [@TheBoltEater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheBoltEater)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/17 "2009-10-16T20:12:33Z")
Roland, I hope those tickets work out for you. I’ll be looking for your sign in the front row. Even though I miss taunting VaJayJay, Monday Night against the Donkeys is always a blast. Be sure to let us know how the trip turned out when you get back. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/18 "2009-10-16T20:30:32Z")
Too bad you’re not seeing Atlanta game. **M** issing **N** other **F** alcon? ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/19 "2009-10-16T20:53:53Z")
No clever answer for you – just wanted to wish you the best of luck and I really hope you’re able to pull this off and get your dad on TV. Two things I wanted to point out, though – 1: I think being on the 50, while great for watching the game, is going to hurt you in the “get on TV” department. It seems to me that most of the fan closeups come from outside the “20-20” area. Still, worth a shot, and I could very well be way off base on this. 2: I hope you’ll take it with the full weight of one football fan to another when I say to you – fuck the Chargers. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Roland\_Orzabal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@Roland\_Orzabal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roland_Orzabal)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868/20 "2009-10-16T21:49:42Z")
Jesus, **Hal** , is there anything I like that you _don’t_ despise? What’s your take on rare prime rib? 😃 Thanks for the good wishes, everyone. **TBE** , I kept the nosebleed tickets in case we actually want to see the game at some point. I’ll probably post a thread about my adventures when I return, if anything particularly interesting happens. Off I go! (Well, at 2:00 a.m. tomorrow anyway, but close enough.) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wordsmiths-help-me-come-up-with-a-sign-for-monday-night-football/513868.md?page=2)