# Workplace Griping Spinoff - Shredder Guy and other tales **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 10, 2011, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014 "2011-06-10T19:01:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2011, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/41 "2011-06-12T14:07:47Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Anyone who boobytraps food is a callous asshole of the first order. Either talk to him, hide the food, talk to management or get another job, but booby trapping food is just plain wrong, and sets you up as a lower form of life that even “shredderguy”. > > And, OP- if **flatlined** wanted a series of his quotes, why not let him do it himself? This was just plain a waste of hampster power. No, your post was the waste of hampster\*(sic)\* power. ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2011, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/42 "2011-06-12T15:59:27Z")
**Rebo** , your transparent attempt at post-count padding makes me sick. [D&R] 😉 Joe ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2011, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/43 "2011-06-12T16:03:04Z")
> [@Raginghormonal](#): > > I think these stories are great. I have a couple from many moons ago. > > We had a food stealer at my previous employer. We all knew it was him. He even copped to it most of the time. His excuse was that he had come from a very large and poor family where he used to have to almost fight for his daily meals. > > He went too far with me one day though. I had to work through lunch and was eating a burrito in between posting. I had the burrito behind me so that nothing would get on the keyboard and had taken only a couple of bites. When I turned around to take my next bite, my burrito was gone. I looked up in confusion and saw this guy walking down the stairs eating my partially eaten food. I called out to him a couple of times to get his attention. When he turned around there was still a glaze in his eyes. It was sort of comical actually. He did feel bad and we both laughed, but I still went hungry that day. He’d been warned a lot, so they guys in the service department did booby trap him twice. He constantly took their afternoon snacks from their tool boxes. > > I also had a female co-worker that was dangerous around chocolate. I had a Hershey bar on my desk that I had broken one square off of. She walked by, picked up my candy and licked the entire surface of the bar. I was astonished. Yes, she got the candy. We were sort of friends, but it still ticked me off. Enough time has passed that I can just chuckle about these now. Jesus, I’m not a violent person, but I’m not sure I could stop myself from reflexively administering knuckle sanwiches to those two… Joe ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2011, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/44 "2011-06-12T16:36:49Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Anyone who boobytraps food is a callous asshole of the first order. Either talk to him, hide the food, talk to management or get another job, but booby trapping food is just plain wrong, and sets you up as a lower form of life that even “shredderguy”. Ridiculous. It was only “boobytrapped” to taste really salty. Nobody put an IED in it. ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2011, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/45 "2011-06-12T17:11:40Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > **Rebo** , your transparent attempt at post-count padding makes me sick. > > [D&R] > 😉 > > Joe Shaddup, homer… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2011, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/46 "2011-06-13T23:14:31Z")
A good number of years ago, I was working for a small company that needed to bring a contractor in. Said contractor looked good, on paper. She’d worked for a company that used the same documentation software we did (Framemaker), and had used it for years. We figured she’d have no trouble coming on board, since all we had to do was get her up to speed on the software we were documenting. Trouble started soon after she did. [ol] [li]She didn’t know how to create a book in FM, which is one of the more basic tasks. [/li][li]She didn’t know how to create generated files. [/li][li]She wanted to know how to find out which “template” had been used to create a document, something which has meaning in WORD but not in Frame.[sup]1[/sup] When we told her there was no way to find that out, she not only didn’t believe us, she took the question to a professional discussion email list (people on it told her she was an idiot and we were right, so there was that). [/li][li]She decided flex time meant she could start at whatever time she wanted as long as she worked 8 hours in a row, so she walked in whenever she felt like it. One day, she walked into a meeting over an hour late and proceeded to “raise points” and ask questions about things we’d already covered, all the while opening and closing her thermos that squeaked like MAD. [/li][li]Anytime she had a question about something, she had to spend 15 minutes, at least, telling you all about extraneous details that had NO BEARING on the actual issue before getting to the point. [/li][li]Our engineers actually requested that she be prevented from talking to them about the product. These were nice people, patient, intelligent, always willing to answer questions. They not only didn’t want to work with her one-on-one, they didn’t want her invited to development meetings.[/li][li]Once, she _followed me into the bathroom as I was leaving work for the day_ to ask me a question about something that (a) she should have been bright enough to figure out for herself, (b) could easily have waited until the next day to find out about, © Hi, Opal!, and (d) wasn’t something she needed to be worrying about ANYWAY.[/li][li]The day she was let go was also the day a good friend/co-worker was retiring. Our manager missed the going away lunch because she managed to delay her packing up and leaving for so long that he had to pack her up himself and escort her out to her car.[/li][/ol] The sad thing is, she was a nice lady. Not a malicious bone in her body. But she obviously lived in a little world of her own, and she was totally oblivious to the impression she made. The day she was leaving, she caught me alone and demanded to know why no one was talking to her, had we been told not to? Talk about awkward! The kicker was that the HR department hadn’t put a phrase in the contract she signed about dismissal for cause, so she managed to force the company to bring her back to finish out her three months. Luckily, they also managed to put her in a separate department on a different floor, because there was a real threat of mutiny on our part when we heard she was coming back. [sup]1[/sup]Frame can use any existing document as a template to create a new one. There are no ties to the document used as a template. None. No way to track it back. No difference in the file extensions. We told her this more than once, but she refused to believe it didn’t work like it did in Word. This from a woman who claimed to have YEARS of experience working in Framemaker. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/47 "2011-06-14T00:10:52Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > Ridiculous. It was only “boobytrapped” to taste really salty. Nobody put an IED in it. Nobody played the old ‘exploding egg’ bit? The puns and jokes write themselves for that one. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/48 "2011-06-14T00:32:23Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Nobody played the old ‘exploding egg’ bit? The puns and jokes write themselves for that one. Yeah, the worker who got hit with the exploding egg bit sure got some cooked unfertilized embryo on his face! Wait, I’ll come in again. ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/49 "2011-06-14T01:37:21Z")
> [@saje](#): > > I think the collection is great, it really highlights Teh Krazee, much more than a random quote or two or a thread link. And it’s a perfect jumping off point for other lunatic coworkers tales. > > Wish I had some, but I only work for/with my husband 🆒 And you don’t have any “lunatic coworker tales” from _that_? Damn, a match made in heaven. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/50 "2011-06-14T01:45:00Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Nobody played the old ‘exploding egg’ bit? The puns and jokes write themselves for that one. “Exploding egg”? I am obviously deficient in my education in practical jokes. Tell me about exploding eggs. ---
**Author:** ![MyFootsZZZ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/myfootszzz/32/12580_2.png) [@MyFootsZZZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MyFootsZZZ)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/51 "2011-06-14T19:22:35Z")
I had to ask what “PO” meant, (poor right?); What’s “PTO”? Something “overtime”? ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/52 "2011-06-14T19:29:54Z")
I’m pretty sure that “po” is just a semi-phonetic spelling of “poor,” rendered as pronounced by Shredder Guy. PTO is Paid Time Off, often a pool of both vacation and sick time together. ---
**Author:** ![MyFootsZZZ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/myfootszzz/32/12580_2.png) [@MyFootsZZZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MyFootsZZZ)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/53 "2011-06-14T19:40:12Z")
> [@Ferret\_Herder](#): > > I’m pretty sure that “po” is just a semi-phonetic spelling of “poor,” rendered as pronounced by Shredder Guy. PTO is Paid Time Off, often a pool of both vacation and sick time together. Ahh, thanks!! ---
**Author:** ![Boggette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/858c86/32.png) [@Boggette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boggette)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/54 "2011-06-15T15:32:07Z")
[quote=“Morgyn, post:46, topic:585014”] [li]She wanted to know how to find out which “template” had been used to create a document, something which has meaning in WORD but not in Frame.[sup]1[/sup] When we told her there was no way to find that out, she not only didn’t believe us, she took the question to a professional discussion email list (people on it told her she was an idiot and we were right, so there was that).[/li][/QUOTE] This was not the worst part. She used her name, our company name, and the address, phone, etc. of the company in her signature line when she posted that we obviously didn’t know what we were talking about (only to find out they said, “Your co-workers are right! Now get back to work!”) I was mostly angry that she went from one of us, to the next, to the next, … all the way through our staff, with each of us taking time away from our own work to research it for her (not knowing the others had already tried), all to come up with the same answer, which she still didn’t believe. To this day, I still don’t understand why this was so damn important to her! ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/55 "2011-06-15T16:17:08Z")
> [@Boggette](#): > > I was mostly angry that she went from one of us, to the next, to the next, … all the way through our staff, with each of us taking time away from our own work to research it for her (not knowing the others had already tried), all to come up with the same answer, which she still didn’t believe. Oh, I’d forgotten that part. And now that my memory’s been prodded, I seem to recall that she did this every time she had a question and didn’t believe the answer she was given. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/56 "2011-06-15T17:23:02Z")
You two work together? ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/57 "2011-06-15T18:51:34Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > Jesus, I’m not a violent person, but I’m not sure I could stop myself from reflexively administering knuckle sanwiches to those two… And then you could’ve covered your ass by saying “Sorry. I came from a large and poor family where we had to fight for our meals.” ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2011, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/58 "2011-06-16T00:45:29Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > You two work together? Used to. Best job ever. With few exceptions (see above), everyone was intelligent, witty, hard, competent workers, downright _nice_, and fun to work with. You know you’re in a good place when the \*\*\*mangers \*\*\*hold Nerf gun battles. Alas, the CEO was a putz, and put all the company eggs into a single, oh, so wrong, basket. Thus, we no longer work together. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2011, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/59 "2011-06-16T04:07:09Z")
humpf. snarls at the internetz for eating my post. If I just put it somewhere wrong, I hope the mods will kill it. Background: SG is part time, he works 8:30-4:30 on Tues. and Wed., then 8:30-3:30 on Thur. I work 8:00-5:00 Mon. to Fri. I live in the sticks, and have 2 ways to get to work. I can take the highway, which puts me driving through about eleventy hundred stoplights and lots of construction (hyperbole, its only 43 stoplights), or I can take the bypass and only hit 17. If I take the highway, I go by SG’s camp trailor park. So, on Monday, SG called me and said he didn’t have gas money to get to work. I asked him if he wanted to use his PTO and take the next 2 weeks off and he asked if I could pick him up. I reminded him that I smoke in my car and that he would have to get in early and leave late. He whined about the smoke, he’s a diabetic and can’t handle it, but agreed that he would just surf the web on the extra time. Refuses to get distracted about the diabetic thing, thats a different rant. From what I understand, diabetics shouldn’t eat half a sheet cake in one afternoon… Stupid me, I agreed that I didn’t need to smoke on the 20 minutes that we would be in the car together and told him that I’d pick him up at 7:20. More whining because it only takes him 20 minutes to get to work. I told him that rush hour traffic was different and that I liked to get to work 10-15 minutes early. Yes, I do know I should have figured out that this was a bad idea, but as much as I’ve ranted about him, I still feel sorry for him, and it wouldn’t kill me to take the highway for 2 weeks. :smack: So of course, when I got there yesterday, SG wasn’t ready. I pounded on the flimsy door of his camp trailor and he yelled out that he was just finishing up making lunch. I yelled back that he had to hurry and that we were going to be late. When he finally came out at 7:35, I was sitting in my car, listening to the news on the radio and smoking. SG whined about me smoking and I told him to roll his window down, then turned the radio up. When we got to work, at 7:57, he used an “I told you so” voice to point out that I was on time. I told him that if he wasn’t standing outside at 7:20 in the future, I would just leave him. He must have figured out that I was out of sorts because I had to start my day rushing around, so pretty much left me alone until 4:30. Then because _he_ was done working, he thought he should sit in my office and give me his opinion about politics. I chased him out, then when it was time to leave, he was so occupied with something on the internet that I had to go find him and tell him to log off so we could leave. This morning, SG was standing where he was supposed to be when he was supposed to be. I didn’t smoke, but I did turn the radio up so I didn’t have to listen to him talking about sports. At lunch time, he asked to borrow my car so he could go to the grocery store because he was out of food. I suggested that he walk to grocery store 3 blocks away and he said he NEVER shopped there (another lie, I’ve seen him carry those bags in) and wanted to go to grocery store 20 miles away (casino on the way to that store). I told him that he would have to kick in some gas money, he told me his “too po to buy gas” story again and I told him that he couldn’t use my car. He slumped out defeated. I used my car on my lunch break to go pick up kittens and SG was sure to take all the facilities people to look at them, because he’s so involved in rescue. On the way home, he asked to stop at the other grocery store and I told him that it was too hot to leave the kittens (and me) sitting in the car while he shopped. Yes, I am a bitch, but he could have walked to close grocery store and put his stuff in the fridge. I do it all the time. After more whining about no food, he asked if I would at least stop at a mini-mart so he could buy some bread. I agreed and stopped at a 7-11. I watched while he walked straight to the counter, bought some lottery tickets and came back. I asked why he didn’t have bread and he said they didn’t have what he liked, and that it cost too much. :dubious: I casually mentioned that the reason that 7-11’s don’t have signs covering their windows is because of holdups, they want people to be able to see what was happening at the cash registers. Deer in the headlight look happened. Tomorrow, he is supposed to be waiting at 7:00 because I have to drop the kittens off at the vet. Anyone want to take bets on how that’s going to work out? ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2011, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014/60 "2011-06-16T05:23:45Z")
**flatlined** , honey, I know you’re just doing this so you can have more stories for us, but honest, we don’t need 'em that badly. Don’t do this to yourself! Oh, who am I kidding. More! More! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-griping-spinoff-shredder-guy-and-other-tales/585014.md?page=4)