# Workplace skits - no thanks, I'll take the hot steel pokers in my eyes, please **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 25, 2004, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511 "2004-08-25T23:11:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/41 "2004-08-27T05:02:59Z")
> [@chique](#): > > **Lissa** , I’m sure your hubby does a fine job. The fact of the matter, however, is that the tactics employed by corporations involved with the UW not only turn people off of donating to them, they also turn people off from donating PERIOD. So fucking chill, and realize that “Give money to US!” skits are fucking lame, as are organizations that compel companies to guilt people into giving up part of their paychecks. People just don’t like the idea that they are forced or guilted in to giving money to anything - a perfect example of why “compassionate conservatism” is a crock and why the IRS is nearly universally hated. BUT IT’S ONLY $4 A MONTH, FOR THE LOVE OF CHEESE! YOU CHEAP BASTARD! JUST GIVE IT!!! ---
**Author:** ![chique](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@chique](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chique)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/42 "2004-08-27T05:11:36Z")
> [@Zette](#): > > BUT IT’S ONLY $4 A MONTH, FOR THE LOVE OF CHEESE! YOU CHEAP BASTARD! JUST GIVE IT!!! I KNOW! THAT’S WHY I’M SO TORN! CAN’T YOU JUST GIVE THE UW A PASS AND WRITE A $48 CHECK ONCE A YEAR TO THE ORGANIZATION OF YOUR CHOICE?!?!?!? HELL, MAKE IT $50!!! FOR THAT MATTER, MAKE IT $60 - FIVE BUCKS A MONTH TO 12 GROUPS. YOUR MONEY WOULD BE BETTER SPENT! But, no, it’s better for community organizations to deal with the evil that is the UW and settle for the $36 they get after expenses from those money launderers rather than the $60 they _could_ get. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/43 "2004-08-27T05:30:38Z")
> [@Zette](#): > > BUT IT’S ONLY $4 A MONTH, FOR THE LOVE OF CHEESE! YOU CHEAP BASTARD! JUST GIVE IT!!! I was on the fence about this one, but now I’m sold. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/44 "2004-08-27T08:14:52Z")
> [@Zette](#): > > BUT IT’S ONLY $4 A MONTH, FOR THE LOVE OF CHEESE! YOU CHEAP BASTARD! JUST GIVE IT!!! For the love of cheese? Are you from Wisconsin? ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 11:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/45 "2004-08-27T11:03:21Z")
> [@Mockingbird](#): > > For the love of cheese? > > Are you from Wisconsin? His location is “1313 Mockingbird Lane”… the address of TV’s Munsters… Mu(e)nster is a cheese… I think you’re onto something! ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 11:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/46 "2004-08-27T11:36:31Z")
> [@Lissa](#): > > Jesus Christ up a tree! He would _never_ even _dream_ of doing something so nasty and despicable. Good God, all he did was challenge these people by asking them to compare the relative luxury of their lives with those less fortunate and by giving a speech about how important it is to be generous with those who haven’t been as lucky as we are. In _no way_ does this constitute a threat. Wrong. Absolutely wrong. First, what the hell gives him the right to “challenge” people who he is in a position of authority over about anything not directly related to their professional conduct or work? Second, let’s take at face value your statement that your husband would in no way base performance evaluations on their conforming to your personal idea of charity and appropriate giving ("…but it’s _only_ four dollars a month."\*). The fact is, the impression that employees get when they’re publicly brow-beaten (“challenged”) by people in authority is that there _is_ a connection. If your husband, _espeically_ if he was in a position of authority over me, pulled his “look me in the eye and convince me that you really _are_ giving as much as _I_ think is appropriate” routine, he would be in HR facing a “hostile work environment” charge so fast his head would spin and if HR didn’t address it (and I’ll give you 50:1 odds that any decent HR deparment would), the courts certainly would. “Your honor, I was just trying to do my job, but my supervisor kept pressuring me to pay him. He _said_ that there wasn’t any connection between my evaluation and my giving, but he _kept pestering me_ and refused to let me alone to do my job. I told him I wasn’t interested in discussing it, and he kept harassing me.” Hell, the HR department where I would would at the very least, suspend me if I pulled that crap on one of my employees. How is blurring the lines between personal conduct and work-related conduct any different here than in the sort of thing that usually leads to sex-harrassment lawsuits (other than a huge difference of degree)? My finances have…or, I suppose, after reading about the kind of harrassment your husband inflicts on his employees…_should_ have as little to do with my workplace environment as my sex-life. (Now I have the mental picture of your husband going around to employees saying “Hey, you don’t have enough sex at home, so I’m gonna put you down for giving me a blow-job. What? You don’t _want_ to? Can you look me in the eye and to evaluate their life in comparison to a less sexy person? Hell, lemme put you down for a hand-job. It’s the very _least_ you can do.” 😉 😛 ) Why in the world would I chose to give money at work unless I thought I’d benefit from it (or be punished for lack of it). The idea of giving money at work is alien and ugly to me and the idea of discussing my personal life at work. My reason for being at work is to _work_. And anyway, discussing my charitable giving other than in the vaguest of terms (“Such-and-such is a really good organization.”) is loathesome. One does _not_ brag about one’s charity and charitible giving. \*\* Fenris \*What if they’re already taking that $4.00/month and combining it with another $46.00 and giving $50.00/month to the charity of their choice. (I can tell you that my pet charity is one that is _never_ listed in these huge unbrella lists of charities.) . What if they’re giving $100.00/month? $300/month? Surely you’ll concede that at some point you _can’t_ say “Well, _another_ four dollars won’t make or break you.”. And, I assume, that you agree that they have no obligation to discuss any of this with you/your husband. \*\*Hell, I can’t _wait_ for him to shake down a really devout Christian (cf [Matthew Matthew 6:3-4](http://www.christianitytoday.com/biblestudies/questions/needyworld6.html) ) who are _forbidden_ to give publically, and gets slapped with religious discrimination, religious harassment and hostile workplace charges. ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/47 "2004-08-27T12:06:13Z")
> [@chique](#): > > I KNOW! THAT’S WHY I’M SO TORN! CAN’T YOU JUST GIVE THE UW A PASS AND WRITE A $48 CHECK ONCE A YEAR TO THE ORGANIZATION OF YOUR CHOICE?!?!?!? HELL, MAKE IT $50!!! FOR THAT MATTER, MAKE IT $60 - FIVE BUCKS A MONTH TO 12 GROUPS. YOUR MONEY WOULD BE BETTER SPENT! > > But, no, it’s better for community organizations to deal with the evil that is the UW and settle for the $36 they get after expenses from those money launderers rather than the $60 they _could_ get. NONE OF THAT MATTERS- I know you, chique, and I KNOW for a fact where all of your money goes. Why, you’re so cheap that you take money OUT of the bell ringers kettle! Since I’m privy to all of your financial information and know for a fact that you do NOT contribute to any charity whatsoever in any way, I’m going to continue to browbeat you until you give in. How 'bout now? Now? Now? Now? Now? Now? Now? It’s just $4. It’s just $4. It’s just $4. everyone else is doing it. Look at all I do, you lazy bint. GIVE GIVE GIVE to my charity of choice!!! (Is it working yet? I really want to color in the next part of my thermometer and brag to my boss how much I got out of you) ---
**Author:** ![dalej42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@dalej42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalej42)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/48 "2004-08-27T12:28:12Z")
Plus, no one has also mentioned the number of shakedowns that occur on a daily basis in most workplaces. Parents who bring in crap that their kids are selling. The arm twisting to bring in a dish for the pot luck. Tossing in a few dollars for pizza so the dept. can “bond” at lunch. Flowers for the secretary that sits on her ass creating web pages about her cats and making personal phone calls. The fucking Secret Santa. Money that goes into sports pools. All of these optional mandatory items cost money. Corporate arm twisting for charity is just another one of those things that piss people off at work. Of course, opting out means you’re not a “team player.” ---
**Author:** ![Hamadryad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6de8d8/32.png) [@Hamadryad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamadryad)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/49 "2004-08-27T12:33:37Z")
> [@zette](#): > > The organization deducted an average of 6.9 cents of every dollar for administrative purposes, it said, from $14 million collected from donors who earmarked their gifts for specific charities, a program the United Way calls Donor’s Choice. Lissa: please respond to this part, rather than continuing to quote, “6,000 OTHER charities to which you can donate,” which is, I believe, what was addressed with this sentence. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/50 "2004-08-27T12:45:56Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > Why in the world would I chose to give money at work unless I thought I’d benefit from it (or be punished for lack of it). The idea of giving money at work is alien and ugly to me and the idea of discussing my personal life at work. I give at work because it is convenient. I work for IBM and they have a very sophisticated charity campaign. It is confidential, so your boss doesn’t know if you gave or not. It is automatic, through a payroll deduction, if you choose. You have a wide variety of charities, thousands across the country. All they ask is that you “respond” by logging in to the system. You don’t have to give, there’s a prominent button on the webpage for no donation, and it’s confidential. I think that is a very fair request on their part. I’ve never felt pressured to do anything but log in, and my time at IBM is the only time in my life I’ve actually given to charity in any significant amount, so it worked. Unfortunately, smaller companies can’t devote the resources IBM can to organizing a campaign like this, so you wind up with employees being pressured by organizers and feeling threatened because the giving (or not) is recorded for their manager to see. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/51 "2004-08-27T13:28:59Z")
> [@Hamadryad](#): > > Lissa: please respond to this part, rather than continuing to quote, “6,000 OTHER charities to which you can donate,” which is, I believe, what was addressed with this sentence. Or how about this from the article **Fenris** linked: > [@](#): > > Last year, no group within United Way was more popular with local donors than Children’s Hospital of Wisconsin. Voting with their checkbooks and using the option of donor choice, givers designated $258,000 to go to the organization. > > How much extra money did this mean for Children’s Hospital? Not one dollar. > > Nor was this an exception. Of the $34 million donated to United Way last year, about $4 million was designated to specific member agencies. The result? Not one of the 80 member agencies of United Way saw any adjustment in its funding. The article goes on to discuss how each charity they serve is allocated a certain amount of money from the United Way, and only if their “donor choice” donations go above the budgeted money do they actually get any increase in money - and that’s only happened with one charity in that state in the last 4 years. So “donor’s choice” means nothing. Nada. Not only **do** contributors end up paying for the United Way’s expenses with about 20% of their contribution, but their specific donations mean practically nothing - unless a miracle occurs, their money just goes into a big pile with all the rest, and no extra cash goes towards the favored charities. The charities get what United Way determines they’re going to, and those who donate (willingly or because they feel like their job might be affected if they don’t cave in to a superior’s questioning about how good their life is compared to others) are lied to about it. ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/52 "2004-08-27T15:39:17Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > First, what the hell gives him the right to “challenge” people who he is in a position of authority over about anything not directly related to their professional conduct or work? > > If your husband, _espeically_ if he was in a position of authority over me, pulled his “look me in the eye and convince me that you really _are_ giving as much as _I_ think is appropriate” routine, he would be in HR facing a “hostile work environment” charge so fast his head would spin and if HR didn’t address it (and I’ll give you 50:1 odds that any decent HR deparment would), the courts certainly would. “Your honor, I was just trying to do my job, but my supervisor kept pressuring me to pay him. He _said_ that there wasn’t any connection between my evaluation and my giving, but he _kept pestering me_ and refused to let me alone to do my job. I told him I wasn’t interested in discussing it, and he kept harassing me.” Hell, the HR department where I would would at the very least, suspend me if I pulled that crap on one of my employees. \ > > \*\*Hell, I can’t _wait_ for him to shake down a really devout Christian (cf [Matthew Matthew 6:3-4](http://www.christianitytoday.com/biblestudies/questions/needyworld6.html) ) who are _forbidden_ to give publically, and gets slapped with religious discrimination, religious harassment and hostile workplace charges. Well, the fact that this has been his assignment every year for the past five years and no one has yet to make up such a bullshit charge on him should say something. My husband’s integrity in the workplace has never been challenged in that fashion. > [@Hamadryad](#): > > Lissa: please respond to this part, rather than continuing to quote, “6,000 OTHER charities to which you can donate,” which is, I believe, what was addressed with this sentence. HOW MANY GODDAM TIMES TO I HAVE TO SAY THIS: THEY DID **NOT** HAVE TO GIVE THROUGH THE FUCKING UNITED WAY! ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/53 "2004-08-27T15:49:47Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Question…if the employee in question told him that they have a direct-donation plan set up already with a charity of their choice, would he leave them alone? Or would he continue to exhort them to give more and give publicly so that the company/government department/organization could claim more public relations capital? bumping this for answer. If I worked for your husband and I told him that I already donate to a cause would he lay off? For example, I donate to a Boston Terrier rescue group, a group that I can pretty much assure you isn’t one of the 6,000. Is this ‘good enough’ for you or am I supposed to pick a group specifically endorsed by you? Just because nobody hasn’t complained doesn’t mean anything. A lot of people may feel that complaining will black ball them. What your husband does is plain wrong, IMO. Charity should not be forced, EVER. ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/54 "2004-08-27T15:51:24Z")
> [@Lissa](#): > > HOW MANY GODDAM TIMES TO I HAVE TO SAY THIS: THEY DID **NOT** HAVE TO GIVE THROUGH THE FUCKING UNITED WAY! See, this is what confuses me. If it’s not through the UW, then where is this list of 6,000 originating from? ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/55 "2004-08-27T16:19:56Z")
I’m not going to re-hash my past criticisms and flames of the UW, since the Search engine will find them. Suffice to say I think that any quasi-forced charity which can informally and unofficially result in poor work performance reviews or even termination as a result of executives trying to win kickbacks or even “bragging rights” is a situation which should prompt passing a law to throw both the culprits AND the organizers in jail - or at least allow for serious civil penalties. Don’t think it will happen anytime soon. At least at my company the UW work is assigned (yes, you don’t have a choice, actually) to people who would normally be heading out the door before long due to lack of work. So it gives them something to do whilst waiting for some real work to open up, which hopefully helps them out by keeping their job. So UW rallying is like a form of corporate welfare in a way…subsidized by my Projects. Wow, I get doubly screwed. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/56 "2004-08-27T16:34:19Z")
> [@Bad News Baboon](#): > > See, this is what confuses me. If it’s not through the UW, then where is this list of 6,000 originating from? She mentioned that there were other umbrella organizations as well as individual charities to choose from. My company’s campaign works this way too, we have many individual charities as well as United Way based choices. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/57 "2004-08-27T17:37:00Z")
> [@Lissa](#): > > HOW MANY GODDAM TIMES TO I HAVE TO SAY THIS: THEY DID **NOT** HAVE TO GIVE THROUGH THE FUCKING UNITED WAY! But what if they don’t want to give _at all_? **Lissa** , I think the point is not that they have options other than the UW. It’s that they are being pressured at work to part with their hard-earned money for something other than what _they choose to do_. You could have any number of charities that I would be interested in donating too. The minute anyone tells me I _must_ donate, well, then, mysteriously my pocketbook locks down. You like to donate to charity. Others don’t. Yes, it may only be $4 a month and they can well afford it. _But it’s their money_. And no one likes to be coerced. There’s a reason people hate high-pressure salespeople. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/58 "2004-08-27T17:39:51Z")
> [@Lissa](#): > > HOW MANY GODDAM TIMES TO I HAVE TO SAY THIS: THEY DID **NOT** HAVE TO GIVE THROUGH THE FUCKING UNITED WAY! I don’t know. Do you at least realize that most if not all of us would feel the exact same way whether it was the UW or not? I don’t care if the donations were to my own personal beer fund, workplace coersion to donate is immoral no matter how worthy the cause. Haj ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/59 "2004-08-27T21:48:52Z")
> [@Cheesesteak](#): > > She mentioned that there were other umbrella organizations as well as individual charities to choose from. My company’s campaign works this way too, we have many individual charities as well as United Way based choices. I think I am confused because I am not familiar with what an umbrella organization is or how charities as such work. Do all umbrella charities take a chunk of the procedes? How are the individual charities added in? Thanks for educating me! ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2004, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511/60 "2004-08-27T22:24:49Z")
Umbrella fundraising organizing organizations like the United Way provide several really useful functions to large institutions that want to be perceived as “good corporate citizins”. 1. They can help HR and finance departments put processes in place to make the collections virtually labor-free through payroll deductions. 2. They relieve companies of the burden of deciding what charities are worth supporting. In a sense it’s a form of money laundering. They can throw their money into a pool for pre-approved “good” organzations, with a big enough list that most people can find something on it worth giving to. 3. They are a cheap source of marketing gold for all the “citizenship” strategies. The top donor companies make it onto the papers or TV, the funded programs do special events where they publicly thank their donors. It’s the old “We give back to the community” scheme, and it’s a particularly good deal because they squeeze the money out of their employees. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/workplace-skits-no-thanks-ill-take-the-hot-steel-pokers-in-my-eyes-please/261511.md?page=4)