# World's Funniest Joke -- Update **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 3, 2010, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350 "2010-11-03T17:43:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/21 "2010-11-04T04:28:56Z")
Q. How many perverts does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. Just one. But it takes the whole hospital emergency team to get it back out. ---
**Author:** ![Angel\_of\_Doubt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7cd45c/32.png) [@Angel\_of\_Doubt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angel_of_Doubt)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/22 "2010-11-04T04:45:53Z")
Damn - never mind - it’s on one of the sites linked to already. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/23 "2010-11-04T10:53:05Z")
Q: Why does Mike Tyson cry after sex? A: The pepper-spray! My all-time favorite: Q: Who led the pedant’s revolt? A: Which Tyler! ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/24 "2010-11-04T11:00:41Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > Q: Who led the pedant’s revolt? > > A: Which Tyler! It took me a second, I confess, but then I did literally lol. I have a friend who is a professor of history who taught me to appreciate this kind of humor. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![bartleby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bartleby/32/10491_2.png) [@bartleby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bartleby)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/25 "2010-11-04T11:25:28Z")
What has 4 legs and goes “AAAAAAAAAAA” A sheep with no lips. ---
**Author:** ![grimpixie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecb155/32.png) [@grimpixie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grimpixie)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/26 "2010-11-04T11:31:26Z")
> [@Gedd](#): > > What’s brown and sticky? > A stick What’s brown and sounds like a bell? DUNG!! ---
**Author:** ![wolf-alice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/9e8a1a/32.png) [@wolf-alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf-alice)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/27 "2010-11-04T12:31:34Z")
This is how I heard the Gambling God joke, via B3ta I think - [SPOILER]A man is walking along a beach, sad and depressed, when he hears a booming voice from the heavens. “DIG!” says the voice. The man looks around, a little confused. “DIG!” Booms the voice again. The man thinks what the hell and starts digging at the sand in front of him. Suddenly he hits a wooden box. He picks it up and the voice shouts “OPEN!” He opens it to see hundreds of gold coins. He’s a little taken aback when the voice shouts again “CASINO!” What the hell, thinks the guy, so off he walks. He enters the casino door when he hears the voice shout “ROULETTE!” He walks over to the roulette table and awaits more instructions. “16 BLACK!” the voice says So the man puts the whole chest on 16 black, the wheel is spun and it lands on 5 red. “FUCK!” shouts the voice…[/SPOILER] You’re sick, **bartleby**. I like that. An my absolute favourite joke of all time is: Q. Why did the lion get lost? A. Because jungle is massive. … It has niche appeal. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/28 "2010-11-04T12:49:23Z")
From the link in Post #7: > [@](#): > > I can’t think of anything worse after a night of drinking than waking up next to someone and not being able to remember their name, or how you met, or why they’re dead. (Laura Kightlinger) I’ve seen her a few times on TV and like her style a lot. So I went looking for more of her stuff and ran across this: [http://www.cbc.ca/gfx/pix/dinoire\_isabelle\_CP\_9456222.jpg](http://www.cbc.ca/gfx/pix/dinoire_isabelle_CP_9456222.jpg) Does anybody know the story behind this? Is it for real? I must say it reminds me of: [http://www.comedywood.com/hof/msmith.jpg](http://www.comedywood.com/hof/msmith.jpg) who is another funny gal. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/29 "2010-11-04T13:23:38Z")
I remember some female comedian saying: “Yeah, I’m unmarried, no kids… at least (wink) none that I know about.” ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/30 "2010-11-04T13:29:47Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > It took me a second, I confess, but then I did literally lol. I’m having a blond moment here. Can someone spoiler me a clue? ---
**Author:** ![brewha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@brewha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brewha)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/31 "2010-11-04T13:57:58Z")
Smell Mop! that and the sheep one tickeled me. AAAAAA! When SCUBA diver goes SCUBA diving, why do they sit on the edge of the boat and fall backwards? Cause if they fell forward, they still be in the boat. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/32 "2010-11-04T13:58:17Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I’m having a blond moment here. Can someone spoiler me a clue? I need one as well. ETA: And while we’re at it, can somebody point to the thread and/or post where the punch line is either “YMCA” or “Village People.” It’s very recent but I can’t remember the theme or topic of the thread. ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/33 "2010-11-04T14:10:32Z")
What’s brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/34 "2010-11-04T14:23:33Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I’m having a blond moment here. Can someone spoiler me a clue? Check it out: [http://www.middle-ages.org.uk/the-peasants-revolt.htm](http://www.middle-ages.org.uk/the-peasants-revolt.htm) ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/35 "2010-11-04T14:40:43Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I’m having a blond moment here. Can someone spoiler me a clue? The _Peasant’s_ revolt was led by _Wat_ Tyler. “Wat” sounds like a British accent saying “what?” a pedant would say “which” when referring to people. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/36 "2010-11-04T14:49:10Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > The _Peasant’s_ revolt was led by _Wat_ Tyler. > > “Wat” sounds like a British accent saying “what?” > > a pedant would say “which” when referring to people. Thank you. Now that it’s been explained, I find it totally unfunny. Had I known a little more about medieval English history, I probably would have lol’d. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/37 "2010-11-04T16:03:14Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Thank you. Now that it’s been explained, I find it totally unfunny. Had I known a little more about medieval English history, I probably would have lol’d. Yeah, I know. It’s funny to only a few odd folks. Those who love obscure historical/grammatical laffs. I find it the funniest joke ever but there is no right or wrong in comedy, thank God. ---
**Author:** ![Gedd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gedd/32/4938_2.png) [@Gedd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gedd)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/38 "2010-11-04T17:36:55Z")
I had to look that one up too, but I’m weird and still found it funny. Here’s another for the pedants. (I hope it’s grammatically correct). Did you hear about the statistician who went to the prostitute’s house to do a survey on the household demographics? She would have offered him a good deal afterwards, but she knew you should never end a census with a proposition. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/39 "2010-11-04T17:49:09Z")
We’re the [Aristocrats](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Aristocrats_(joke))! ---
**Author:** ![pyromyte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d26b3c/32.png) [@pyromyte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pyromyte)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350/40 "2010-11-04T17:56:19Z")
“You know I work really hard for a living. I’m up before daylight, I toil all day, and when I came home to my wife, I’m really looking forward to a hearty home-cooked meal. So Monday, I open the front door, deep sniff…and… nothing. Tuesday, again, nothing. By third day I decide I’m going to have a talk with my old lady. Lay down the law, so to speak. Well, it must’ve really upset her, because I didn’t see her for two days after that. But after the third day I could see a little bit out of my left eye.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worlds-funniest-joke-update/559350.md?page=3)