Both cannabis and ethanol within the same amphitheatre? Surely you jest.
Did you call the constable upon them or just faint dead away?
I saw Honeymoon Suite in a bar in downtown Barrie, ON a few years ago. The bar had just renovated and changed it’s…vibe? atmosphere?..to try and make itself more “classy.” Haha. I was there to see a friend’s son’s band open for them. Oh and plus I love Honeymoon Suite. There was hardly anybody there. Johnny Dee and the boys were doing a great job but nobody was dancing, nobody was even kind of tapping their feet. It was surreal. I think a few songs in maybe 5 people got on the dance floor. I felt so bad for the band. To me it’s just disrespectful to go see a band and not at least act like you appreciate them.
In the liner notes for Supertramps’s live album “Paris”, they talk about the first time they played in Paris - it was some small club and only about a dozen people were in the audience. They found out later that their manager had actually gone out on the street and paid about half of them to come in for the show!
A friend of mine had a band that performed at a bar near me, so I attended. There was snow causing horrible driving conditions, plus the Penguins were playing the final game for the Stanley Cup (which they won).
There was the band, me, and the bartender.
I stayed and the band played one of their best nights ever, doing two sets and an encore. I had a great time, the band got paid, the bartender got a story to tell (he didn’t know what to make of the situation).
After the show we all (except the bartender) went to an all night restaurant.
I like some obscure bands, so I’ve seen some of them give concerts in some pretty strange places, like an art studio or a loading dock in an alley. These places could only support a few dozen at most, so when they drew a dozen or two, it wasn’t too much of a disappointment. I found it enjoyable that there were only a handful of us there, it seems to increase the intimacy of the occasion. I didn’t attend, but when I was in college, the Smithereens played a show at the basketball arena which drew an absurdly low amount (something like 50, most of which were comped).
When I was in high school, I was at a few movies where my group were the only ones in the theater. Most notable was going to see Madonna’s “Truth or Dare” on opening day. There were 4 people in the theater: besides my girlfriend and me, there was one other couple in there.
Heathen Haven. . . now there is a bar I would frequent.
…and an encore? Did you also bring roses to toss up on the stage and run around the room doing the wave?
Apart from some bar bands or not very famous acts, the worst attended concert I saw was probably David Bowie at the Meadowlands around 13 -15 years ago. The terrible thing was that the stadium was packed to the rafters during the opening act - Nine Inch Nails - but as soon as he was done, there began a gradual trickle of people out of the stadium. By the time Bowie took the stage, about a third of the people had left. By the end of his set, about half the people were gone.
It’s the Meadowlands however, so that still meant several thousand people were there, but the dramatic difference was impossible not to see. Pretty much everyone left in the audience was on the field and nobody was in the stands. I felt bad for Bowie - it must have been humiliating knowing that more than half your audience was just there to see your opening act.
When I saw the Police in ‘Boston’ (whatever that stadium is in Foxboro), Sting said that the first time they played Boston 6 people showed up, and the Police spent as much time sitting at the bar drinking with the ‘audience’ as playing.
I was really into alternative music in college, so I’ve seen plenty of bands just starting out with maybe 10 people in the audience.
Worst attended play? That’s tough. I’ve seen and performed lots of poorly attended improv, but obviously that’s not the same.
My wife insisted she wanted to see The Man with Two Brains. We went to the theater to see the matinee, and we were the only people there. This was a long time ago, before the modern movie multi-plex culture had arisen.
I once listened to this band. They were quite popular at the time so the arrangers had booked one of the largest halls in town and we were some 20-30 people in the audience, scattered all over the place. During a pause I asked one of them if it was inspiring, playing for such a large crowd and he couldn’t but agree.
The Man with Two Brains came out in 1983, and there were already many multiplex theaters. One with 21 screens opened up in 1981, for instance.
For a first date, I went with a girl to a matinee of “Mom & Dad Save The World”. We were the only ones in the theatre. Let me tell you, it can get a bit awkward when you’re the only in the theatre laughing at a joke.
For a theatrical event, my wife and I went to see the Moscow Cat Circus once. The 1000+ seat theatre was maybe 5% full.
For music, I went to a Run DMC show in Kitchener, Ontario at a bar. The bar was moderately busy, but that was still only about 300 people, I’m guessing.
They did an encore because we were having a great time, they were drinking free, and I was pounding my glass rhythmically demanding an encore. The entire night I behaved as I would if there were a packed house.
Years ago the band I was in had a gig at the rec hall at an army base. We played two hours for an audience of one. He was a new transfer and had only been on the base a couple of hours, so he didn’t know anyone yet. Apparently that type of event normally had no one attending. We also once played a four hour gig that had an audience of zero for the first hour. (Supper was being served in a different room. The place was packed after the first break.)
I was also once in a performance of a melodrama for an audience of two. It was Halloween. We thought it was a dumb evening to schedule a play, but they had performances the last weekend of every month without exception.
When I was unemployed for a year, my SO and I would go see movies during the week and a few times we would be the only two people to see a film that had been out for a couple weeks when we went to the first showing of the mid=week day.
Ages ago I was in NYC for the Gay Pride Festival and, at the very end of Christopher Street, there was a flatbed trailer set up and a band playing. A friend and I stood and listened to a band play - there were maybe 20 people there listening - and I said, “They are really good! What’s the name of the band?” My friend said, “They are called Blondie.” Yep, that was Deborah Harry up there and nobody knew them nor cared.
I worked at a legit theater in Beverly Hills that normally closed down in the summer, but two brothers had written a musical and paid to have it produced out of their own pocket. Opening night they had maybe 40 people (almost all comp tickets to friends and family) and for the next three weeks, attendance was dismal. I remember a couple of nights with no sold tickets and maybe three or four comps. I might add this show was truly wretched and didn’t deserve to see the light of day. Still, it was sad to see those two brothers coming out every night to check ticket sales. My guess is they lost at least $500,000 on that production.
I saw Ryan Gosling’s “Drive” in the theater last week. I was the only one there. It was kind of nice; I was able to switch seats in the middle, check for text messages, slurp my soda.
I saw the second off-Broadway preview of Avenue Q. There were thirteen people in the audience.
I saw the Producers on 9/13/2001. About 60 people in the audience for what was the hottest ticket on Broadway at the time.
Opening night of an operetta I was in a few years back. Approximately 20 cast members, 20 orchestra musicians, and a tech crew of about 20. We outnumbered our audience 6 to 1. Fortunately word got out, and our closing weekend performances were nearly sold out.
Mrs G and I went to a stage show of Waiting for Godot. The audience was 4 people, including us (and about 100 empty seats).