# Worst Christmas presents ever! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 9, 2005, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853 "2005-12-09T09:19:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/21 "2005-12-09T17:26:23Z")
> [@ms.deanna](#): > > I’m not the kind of person who would bitch about getting any kind of gift. I’m touched that people would think enough of me to want to get me something. Me too…if they _thought_ enough. Problem is, some people just don’t _think._ They give because they’re \*supposed to \* and it’s obvious they didn’t want to do it. They did it for appearances. I vote for “don’t bother” in those cases. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/22 "2005-12-09T17:27:42Z")
> [@PrehensileRectum](#): > > One Christmas I got a three pack of lady’s Hanes underwear. Uh, thanks mom? > > Here’s the thread to post the worst/stupidest/weird/ lamest Christmas present you ever received. Was the problem that it was underwear, or that it was girl’s? 🙂 Now for the rectum question. :smack: Does your name have anything to do with the egg laying Alien queen? 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/23 "2005-12-09T17:29:17Z")
I got a _Pearl Harbor_ DVD from my SO and exchanged it for _Moulin Rouge!_. The only gift I ever exchanged, IIRC. ---
**Author:** ![dwc1970](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a183cd/32.png) [@dwc1970](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwc1970)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/24 "2005-12-09T17:40:55Z")
When I was in the eighth grade a friend gave me a _used_ cassette tape of Darryl Hall and John Oates “Big Bam Boom.” How did I know it was used? The scratches on the _cracked_ cassette case were a good indication for starters, plus the fact it still had the price sticker from the music store on it, and the case wasn’t shrink-wrapped or sealed. The tape was probably not wound all the way to the end, either, but since I never played it, I didn’t know this. Hell, someone could have recorded the audio from a porno movie over it and I wouldn’t have ever known it. When he asked me later if I liked such-and-such song off of it I just lied and said, “oh yeah, that’s a good song.” Oh, and just to make me think I was getting something bigger, he included a 5 pound weight from his weight set in the box he put the tape in. Gee, thanks! :rolleyes: And one more thing, I hated Hall and Oates with a passion (still don’t care for them now). He knew I was into metal (and I still am). ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/25 "2005-12-09T17:44:29Z")
My stories are in the other thread. My grandmother certainly did give me good stories to tell, even if she made my childhood quite difficult. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/26 "2005-12-09T17:45:35Z")
> [@DeVena](#): > > I’ve had a lifetime of christmas sweaters that my mom purposely bought two sizes too small. To \*encourage \* me. I’m 38 and roughly the size of a buick. And I hate sweaters. Not exactly the encouragement she intended. My mom hasn’t bought me sweaters since I was little. She saw me wearing a sweater one Christmas a couple years ago and told me the reason: she thought I hated them. No, ma, I just don’t like _woolen_ ones! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/27 "2005-12-09T17:59:55Z")
I’m going to sneak this in, even though it was really a birthday present. When I was 11 or 12 I asked for a Simon and Garfunkel tape. Dad claimed he couldn’t find one, (sure, Dad) so he bought me “something close” - a tape of Gregorian chants. I tried listening to it once, but I gave up. _Definitely_ not my thing. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/28 "2005-12-09T18:07:54Z")
My father was unable to buy something, that didn’t make you go “What!”. Now money was tight so family members wanted appliances. He would buy you some spatulas if you asked for a good electric mixer for baking. One year he bought a board game that needed 6 players minimum. There were 5 kids total in the family. We played a lot of board games, but that was just too many people needed to play at once. One year when we started drawing names for presents, and you were only getting the one present, I was very disappointed. I asked him to get me a good shovel or fork for my garden, when he went to another town that had a store with nice one’s. He went to that store every weekend for a month, and Christmas day my one present for the year was what? I was handed a white business envelope by him with a twenty dollar bill. “Here you can buy it when you go there.” I spent it on groceries. Mother asked about the shovel two weeks later, and I told her I didn’t get a present, and the money was spent on food. They came out two days later with the shovel. That’s why I posted that people that draw names had better get something, and not just money in an envelope. The last present I got from my father was a Walgreen bin item for about five bucks. A hand held vibrator massager that used 2 D sized batteries. It of coarse didn’t massage, it only vibrated, and made you want to itch the spot. He was definitely King of the “What’s That Presents” for our town. He being a carpenter, I had a nice toy barn the size of a big toy box as a kid. I had hand made kid’s table and chairs to eat at. He just couldn’t buy a present to save his life. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/29 "2005-12-09T18:10:36Z")
> [@ms.deanna](#): > > I’m not the kind of person who would bitch about getting any kind of gift. I’m touched that people would think enough of me to want to get me something. Oh, puleeeeeese. Cue the schmaltzy music for the life lesson learned. :rolleyes: There are gifts and there are gifts. My MIL gave me a pair of panty hose. Wanna know what my husband, their son, got that year? A leather coat, several mall certificates and some damn electronic gizmo that grown men like. My SIL? She got a Kitchen Aide mixer and a bread maker. gee-can anyone say Cinderella? These people are not poor, not suffering from any disability or even early dementia. My MIL felt like beng a bitch to me that year–and she did, loud and clear. She has given me nice things, at times–but I tend to look askance at her gifts at all times due to stuff like the above. Yes, I’m grateful for heartfelt gifts-no matter the price tag. But I find it highly disingenous to go all prim and prosey-preachy about gratitude when gifts can be loaded with meaning, for good or ill. A gift can be a real slap in the face sometimes. I almost always think hard about the gifts I’m giving–and the reasons/motives for them. Sometimes they are not as honorable as they seem. YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/30 "2005-12-09T18:11:46Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#): > > Me too…if they _thought_ enough. Problem is, some people just don’t _think._ They give because they’re \*supposed to \* and it’s obvious they didn’t want to do it. They did it for appearances. I vote for “don’t bother” in those cases. Me too. I think hubby’s grown stepdaughter (a teacher) must be a re-giver. She’s been in our house a hundred times and has never seen anything in the knick-knack category on any surface, but that’s what she gives us. Angels. Woodsy animals skating on a mirror – but wait! It’s also a music box! Huge Christmas decor things too. At least she has the grace not to ask “Where’s that thing I gave you?” when she visits. I’ve never gotten a “bad” gift though, nothing like the ones mentioned here and in the other thread. Just thoughtless ones. I just chuckle and put them in a closet. ---
**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/31 "2005-12-09T18:14:09Z")
My MIL got me a potato peeler. Now, we’re not talking about a fancy thingamabob that peels the potatoes _for_ you. It was a manual potato peeler. The only gift she ever gave me. Oh, and I almost never have occasion to peel potatoes, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/32 "2005-12-09T18:15:59Z")
My brother-in-law is a methamphetamine addict. The first year I was with **The Highwayman** , I got a used (very dogeared and waterdamaged) book of Candle Magic from him. I appreciated at the time that he thought of me, anyways. My husband though, got a book in the same condition on erotic massage. I think it was published somewhere in the 70s. That was ooky enough. But here’s the kicker. My BiL also gave my husband a guitar tuner. The same guitar tuner that had gone missing from my The Highwayman’s guitar case a few months previous. Complete with the rubber band that held the battery pack on. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/33 "2005-12-09T18:31:57Z")
> [@The Weird One](#): > > I’m going to sneak this in, even though it was really a birthday present. When I was 11 or 12 I asked for a Simon and Garfunkel tape. Dad claimed he couldn’t find one, (sure, Dad) so he bought me “something close” - a tape of Gregorian chants. I tried listening to it once, but I gave up. _Definitely_ not my thing. What are you complaining about? They were both in ghe “G” bin. It’s CLOSE!!! ---
**Author:** ![ms.deanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b3f665/32.png) [@ms.deanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ms.deanna)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/34 "2005-12-09T18:34:36Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > Oh, puleeeeeese. Cue the schmaltzy music for the life lesson learned. :rolleyes: > There are gifts and there are gifts. My MIL gave me a pair of panty hose. Wanna know what my husband, their son, got that year? A leather coat, several mall certificates and some damn electronic gizmo that grown men like. My SIL? She got a Kitchen Aide mixer and a bread maker. > > gee-can anyone say Cinderella? These people are not poor, not suffering from any disability or even early dementia. My MIL felt like beng a bitch to me that year–and she did, loud and clear. She has given me nice things, at times–but I tend to look askance at her gifts at all times due to stuff like the above. > Yes, I’m grateful for heartfelt gifts-no matter the price tag. But I find it highly disingenous to go all prim and prosey-preachy about gratitude when gifts can be loaded with meaning, for good or ill. A gift can be a real slap in the face sometimes. > > I almost always think hard about the gifts I’m giving–and the reasons/motives for them. Sometimes they are not as honorable as they seem. > > YMMV. ``` Are you done yet? ``` ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/35 "2005-12-09T18:52:21Z")
> [@ms.deanna](#): > > Are you done yet? Are you? WTH? IMO, your post came off as condescending and patronizing and not a little righteous. I gave the other side. ---
**Author:** ![NailBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecae2f/32.png) [@NailBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NailBunny)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/36 "2005-12-09T18:54:50Z")
Let’s see…one year my uncle, who’s a bit of an eccentric shut in and doesn’t really know kids very well, got me a plastic make-up kit full of garish blushes and eyeshadows and a unicorn statue. When I was 15. My ex-boyfriend one year made a huge deal out of what he was giving me for christmas, he said it was just going to blow my mind! The present? He installed my car stereo for me. It was a nice thing to do, don’t get me wrong, but I was expecting something fantastic and, you know, _tangible_. Not manual labour. ---
**Author:** ![Future\_Londonite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9dc877/32.png) [@Future\_Londonite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Future_Londonite)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/37 "2005-12-09T19:03:07Z")
Slight hijack kinda… This wasn’t a christmas present nor did I get it - it’s a birthday present and I gave it. Still for my friend it probably ranks as the worst/weirdest gift received ever. I decided to give my best friend a portrait of myself for his b-day. Had the photoportrait made, found a huge gilded picture frame in the attic (probably an antique but heck what did I know, this was all before “cash in the attic” and “Antique Roadshow”) and framed the photo… Portrait - 25 dutch guilders Frame - free B-day card - .50 dutch guilders Look on my best friend’s face - priceless ---
**Author:** ![Ludy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Ludy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludy)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/38 "2005-12-09T19:05:09Z")
Mine is more funny then bad, but I am going to post it anyway. My mother really likes buying stocking stuffers. Opening my stocking is always my favorite part of Christmas (except the breakfast, my Grandma makes the best Johnny Cake mmmm). Now my mom also likes to get funny things for the stockings too, example I have gotten more then one pair of musical underwear. The creepy thing was that the first pair I got wouldn’t turn off. My crotch was wishing everyone a Merry Christmas that year. But I digress. A few years ago I pull out this round plastic ball shaped like a Christmas tree ornament. It had a black gold sparkly thing in it. I pull it out and yup it was a black sparkly g-string. I burst out laughing and tossed them at my Mom. She turned bright red, apparently she had no idea she was buying her “little girl” sluttish undies 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/39 "2005-12-09T19:05:45Z")
Nobody’s being warned, but let’s leave the antagonistic posts out of this thread. If you’re going to say something mean or unnecessarily argumentative, wrap it up and send it to someone as a worst Christmas gift, ever. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853/40 "2005-12-09T19:12:17Z")
Point taken, **SkipMagic** …and bah humbug! 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-christmas-presents-ever/334853.md?page=3)