# Worst. Comicbook. Ever. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 13, 2003, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976 "2003-11-13T04:48:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/1 "2003-11-13T04:48:08Z")
What’s the worst comic ever published? I submit to you: Tod Holton, Super Green Beret. [http://www.geocities.com/thoughtviper/holton/th.html](http://www.geocities.com/thoughtviper/holton/th.html) This has got to be the worst ever. Juvenile? Check Godawful art? Check. Horrible dialog? Check. Racist? Check. Stupid concept? Check. Jingoist? Check. Totally ignorant about the setting? Check. > [@](#): > > THE CURTAIN RISES! > > On a new war hero! Not a tough veteran sergeant…or a skilled career officer…or a daring enlistee! No, it is a TEEN-AGE BOY, too young to enlist who creates amazing legends as a SUPER SOLDIER by means of fantastic magic powers! An unofficial member of the proudest and most highly-trained fighting men who wear the U.S Army’s famed green berest, we give you… > > **SUPER GREEN BERET**. Follow the link, if you dare. If you can come up with a more ridiculous comic book, I for one would like to see it. But I believe it cannot be done. IT CANNOT BE DONE. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/2 "2003-11-13T05:18:26Z")
For all your Bad Comics needs: [http://www.ape-law.com/GAF/](http://www.ape-law.com/GAF/) ---
**Author:** ![Adamcomic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/977dab/32.png) [@Adamcomic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Adamcomic)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/3 "2003-11-13T05:19:50Z")
NFL SuperPro, from Marvel ---
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/4 "2003-11-13T05:47:18Z")
Hmmm…I’ll have to vote for _Regan’s Raiders_, a comic about President Regan and his cabinet acting as a team of heroic super-commandos. ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/5 "2003-11-13T06:07:56Z")
I didn’t know Donald Regan was president. Musta snuck into the Oval Office sometime when Ron, Nancy, and George Sr. was out of the country… ---
**Author:** ![Fibber\_McGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a6a055/32.png) [@Fibber\_McGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibber_McGee)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/6 "2003-11-13T13:35:08Z")
I’d have to say that I think [HANSI: The Girl Who Loved the Swastika](http://ape-law.com/GAF/Page01/index.html) gives Super Green Beret a run for its money. Magic Monkeys are goofy and surreal, but the scene where Russian soldiers refuse to rape Hansi because she’s too skinny, that’s pure retardation right there. ---
**Author:** ![Kantalooppi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a5b964/32.png) [@Kantalooppi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kantalooppi)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/7 "2003-11-13T14:00:13Z")
[I can’t imagine this could be very good.](http://faans.com/images/CAPCARROTHEADER1.jpg) You’ve got to love the look on Superman’s face, though. I guess he knows, in his heart, that there are tentacles and furries approaching and he’s a comic-book character. ---
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/8 "2003-11-13T14:21:45Z")
No, Captain Carrot was very good! Funny, funny-animals. ---
**Author:** ![Adamcomic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/977dab/32.png) [@Adamcomic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Adamcomic)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/9 "2003-11-13T14:34:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Leaper \* > \*\*I didn’t know Donald Regan was president. Musta snuck into the Oval Office sometime when Ron, Nancy, and George Sr. was out of the country… \*\* Not Donald, comedian Brian Regan. ---
**Author:** ![Mazikeen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a9a28c/32.png) [@Mazikeen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mazikeen)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/10 "2003-11-13T14:38:54Z")
Yeesh…and I thought Jack Chick was bad! Looks like Mr. Chick has some competition. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/11 "2003-11-13T15:35:46Z")
Spider-Man: Chapter One Super Green Beret is Shakespeare next to it. ---
**Author:** ![ddgryphon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8c91f0/32.png) [@ddgryphon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ddgryphon)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/12 "2003-11-13T15:45:00Z")
If you keep it among big comic publihsers, then nothing published was worse than “Brother Power, the Geek” Cite: [http://www.comicbookresources.com/columns/oddball/index.cgi?date=2003-09-29](http://www.comicbookresources.com/columns/oddball/index.cgi?date=2003-09-29) ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/13 "2003-11-13T16:42:56Z")
Maybe, but when Brother Power made an appearance in Swamp Thing years later, it was an excellent story. ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/14 "2003-11-13T16:46:40Z")
Oh my freaking God. Tod Holton has reduced me to a quivering lump of jelly. It wouldn’t be so bad except for that guy’s commentary. I just had to chew on my hand to keep from laughing really loud at work. Then I closed the window. I shall look at it later tonight. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/15 "2003-11-13T16:50:52Z")
I’m still convinced that the worst comic book title of all time was _Marvel Spotlight_. The characters, situations, and dialog were consistently atrocious. (Star Lord, with an “element gun” that shoots air, earth, fire, and water, in a setting about as subtle as _Galactica’s_ “War of the Gods”? Captain Universe, who posessed the Uni-power, and uttered such great curses as “Beans!”?) ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/16 "2003-11-13T17:19:46Z")
You take that back! _I_ was Captain Universe once and I saved this lousy planet and no one even realized it! Harumph. ---
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/17 "2003-11-13T17:59:32Z")
Max, tell me you didn’t actually send away for that comic…please… I should second _Spider-Man: Chapter One._ Atrocious. “Hey, the Sandman and Green Goblin must be related! They have the same hair!” ---
**Author:** ![Uvula\_Donor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e19adc/32.png) [@Uvula\_Donor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uvula_Donor)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/18 "2003-11-13T17:59:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > \*\*(Star Lord, with an “element gun” that shoots air, earth, fire, and water … ) \*\* What’s so special about _that_? Everyone I know can shoot air, earth, and water. And after eating at a cheap Mexican restaurant, I bet they can shoot fire, too. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Max Carnage \*\*\* > You take that back! I was Captain Universe once and I saved this lousy planet and no one even realized it! Harumph._\* Yeah, but what have you done for us _lately_? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/19 "2003-11-13T18:22:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ResIpsaLoquitor \* > \*\*Max, tell me you didn’t actually send away for that comic…please… > > I should second _Spider-Man: Chapter One._ Atrocious. “Hey, the Sandman and Green Goblin must be related! They have the same hair!” \*\* Ooooh, like the GI Joe figure that had your own stats? The did that for Captain Universe? I’d have soooo been there! I was just going by the tag line “The Hero Who Could Be You!” As far as you guys know, I was! Maybe I should post this over in this month’s “Is Anyone On the SDMB Really a Celebrity?” thread. ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976/20 "2003-11-13T18:42:38Z")
Did anyone get that GI Joe figure that had your own stats? I really wanted to, but my mom would never let me. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-comicbook-ever/212976.md?page=2)