# Worst corporate/product mascots **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 21, 2005, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873 "2005-05-21T14:21:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Cynical\_Optimist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Cynical\_Optimist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cynical_Optimist)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2005, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/41 "2005-05-23T02:13:31Z")
I’m suprised nobody nominated “Enzyte Bob” yet. As much as I get creeped out by the new Burger King I just can’t bring myself to hate him since getting Hootie (Darius, whatever) to sing about that chicken ranch. I want to try whatever they were smoking (I still haven’t tried the sandwich) when they came up with that commercial. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2005, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/42 "2005-05-23T02:18:52Z")
> [@Leaper](#): > > Not Herman, Hank. > > (o/~ I get bigger when you void, I’m Hank the Happy Hemmorrhoid! o/~) Right you are, **Leaper**. You know, my cat, Mr. Sphincter, goes crazy whenever he sees Hank on the TV. I’m not sure why. I think I’ll have to ask Guy one of these days- he knows something about cats. He always telss me after the show he’s hoping to find some pussy. Don’t get eliminated, A guy who got the reference ---
**Author:** ![Uvula\_Donor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e19adc/32.png) [@Uvula\_Donor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uvula_Donor)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2005, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/43 "2005-05-23T02:24:26Z")
I nominate [Bob](http://toastytech.com/guis/bobboot1.gif), the smiling mascot for what was perhaps the \*worst \*GUI ever developed for a computer. ---
**Author:** ![Diceman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Diceman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diceman)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2005, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/44 "2005-05-23T03:08:04Z")
Another vote for Burger King’s newest mascot. He’s beyond creepy. If I woke up one morning and found him in bed with me, I’d probably grab the heaviest object I could lay my hands on, and beat him until he stopped breathing. Ditto for if I found him staring in my window like a deranged stalker. Either of those incidents would cause me to run down to the Secretary of State’s office and apply for a Concealed Carry Permit. Sorry BK, but getting Hootie to hawk your food does not make up for the horrors of The King. ---
**Author:** ![Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a9a28c/32.png) [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2005, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/45 "2005-05-23T04:45:31Z")
> [@pasunejen](#): > > The damn Taco Bell chihuahua. Err, I loved him… ---
**Author:** ![pasunejen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/58956e/32.png) [@pasunejen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pasunejen)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2005, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/46 "2005-05-23T11:41:36Z")
> [@Oslo Ostragoth](#): > > Err, I loved him… I think I liked him for two commercials or something like that, but from then on I found him extremely annoying and just wanted him gone… ---
**Author:** ![Meeko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e495f1/32.png) [@Meeko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meeko)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/47 "2005-06-01T11:52:47Z")
> [@Cynical Optimist](#): > > I’m suprised nobody nominated “Enzyte Bob” yet. The Commercials are now self referencial and call him “Smiling Bob”. as in “Smiling Bob’s guide…” The jokes are juvenile at best, and get repeated. The “North pole” at Christmas, the sputtering water hose, the Golf club/putter. Then again, the entire subject can’t escape what it helps do. I guess its here to stay. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/48 "2005-06-01T13:00:15Z")
> [@Meeko](#): > > Then again, the entire subject can’t escape what it helps do. I guess its here to stay. Exactly. You have to be fair and at least give Enzyte Bob credit in that he does, at least, give you an idea what is product is and what it does. Unless you’d prefer to see more of Mike Ditka hawking boner pills. Personally, that’s something I can live without. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/49 "2005-06-01T13:55:38Z")
> [@Merijeek](#): > > Exactly. You have to be fair and at least give Enzyte Bob credit in that he does, at least, give you an idea what is product is and what it does. > > Unless you’d prefer to see more of Mike Ditka hawking boner pills. Personally, that’s something I can live without. > > -Joe Or Bob Dole. _shudder_ ---
**Author:** ![sj2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@sj2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sj2)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/50 "2005-06-01T17:20:35Z")
The caterpillar from [http://www.moneytreeinc.com/](http://www.moneytreeinc.com/) and Empire carpets 800-588-23 hundred…EMPIRE~! ---
**Author:** ![Lisa-go-Blind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7c8e57/32.png) [@Lisa-go-Blind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lisa-go-Blind)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/51 "2005-06-01T19:33:11Z")
> [@Uvula Donor](#): > > I nominate [Bob](http://toastytech.com/guis/bobboot1.gif), the smiling mascot for what was perhaps the \*worst \*GUI ever developed for a computer. Especially unfortunate, as his sunglasses seem to form two o’s between the first and last letters of his name. ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/52 "2005-06-01T19:38:51Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > [Herb](http://www.geocities.com/conspiracyprime/e2_wheresherb.htm), courtesy of Burger King. Holy crap. Now something’s that been bugging me for over 15 years about Bard’s Tale II suddenly makes sense. Weird how this sort of thing happens. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/53 "2005-06-01T22:05:18Z")
> [@pasunejen](#): > > The damn Taco Bell chihuahua. Old joke: FIRST KID: Boy, those chihuahuas sure must be smart dogs! SECOND KID: Why? FIRST KID: 'Cause my Dad says the Mexicans use them to make burritos! ---
**Author:** ![Backwater\_Under\_Duck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ba8739/32.png) [@Backwater\_Under\_Duck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Backwater_Under_Duck)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2005, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/54 "2005-06-02T01:17:10Z")
> [@Dewey Finn](#): > > It’s really sad to think that when [Pet.com](http://Pet.com) collapsed, the most valuable asset they had to sell in bankruptcy was the sock puppet Yeah, but when he was the [Pet.com](http://Pet.com) dog he was edgy and funny, and you could always see the guy’s hand which made the joke better. Now he’s just a stupid little dog with too high of a voice and no snide humor. And the Arby’s oven mitt. You know it used to be a cowboy’s lasso. A piece of rope. Then some ad guy must have noticed the shape was like an oven mitt and an annoying spokes-doofus was born. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2005, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873/55 "2005-06-02T02:48:56Z")
> [@Backwater Under\_Duck](#): > > And the Arby’s oven mitt. You know it used to be a cowboy’s lasso. A piece of rope. Then some ad guy must have noticed the shape was like an oven mitt and an annoying spokes-doofus was born. If you’re referring to the [Arby’s logo](http://www.arbys.com/arb01.html), I always thought it was a cowboy hat. It could be a lasso in the shape of a cowboy hat, now that I look at it again. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-corporate-product-mascots/304873.md?page=2)